Poop naked.

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When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

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I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

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When an awkward situation arises, pull out my phone and aimlessly flip through the apps to pretend I'm busy doing something

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When I'm in the shower I act like I'm filming a music video.

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Sometimes I'll say quotes from movies or TV shows out loud to myself.

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sometimes i poop in my pants and like the smell of my poop. Smells like whatever i just ate.

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When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

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If I have a top comment and I see someone else does, I upvote both of ours; friendly competition.

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having cool friends, but all their other friends are nerds.

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There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

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Just ocassionally stand up and pontlessly walk around the house when using the computer. Anyone?

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You feel compelled to stab someone in the face... But you don't since you know its wrong. Instead you play violent video games to get it off your mind.

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check for spiders under the toilet seat before taking a dump

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Saving my cash this year and not buying into the shopping hype

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interview yourself over some amazing accomplishment you achieved like becoming the youngest emmy winner and pretending you're really humble.

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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Feel uncomfortable with the TV volume on an odd number

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Avoid as many television commercials as I can

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I have walked into a sliding glass door

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Think of the most awkward or dreadful thing you could possibly do in any given situation and be almost compelled to do it but then realising that you could never show your face anywhere ever again if you did.

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Try to keep a balloon in the air with out touching the ground, using anything but my hands -Noel

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Drum on the chair between your legs and wonder if people think that you're playing with yourself.

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When a book is boring, i will think of my favouite song and then i will start singing the book, like i will look at the words and ligit, start singing them in my favourite tune~im so weird

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.