Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

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Wash my hands after i use the toilet.

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I can read people's life's and figure out the truth about them with out them telling me how their life is

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Try to use my "Brain Power" to pick up things when I am too lazy to get up and get them.

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Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

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I know it is pointless but still hope to get THUMBS UP

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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Cover up the webcam on my laptop because I think someone might be watching me through it.

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Raising your hand in class, and once you're called on, you say, "I forgot."

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After peeling an apple, I will put the apple in a zip-lock and hold it through the plastic so my hands won't get sticky while I eat it.

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talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

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Hearing a noise and turning around to see if theres a monster in the room, and when you see nothing you think "hmm, he hides everytime I turn my head around." and then for the next minute you try to suddenly look back to see if you can catch it off guard.

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pick nose in car and realize people can see you when stopped at a red light

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Sit at your desk at work and think to yourself "is this it? I feel like I was meant for something bigger, like being an actor or a real life hero." then you look around you and feel bad because you feel like you dumped on everyone else who seem happy wih their lives. Then you go back to your boring desk job anyway.

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When buying anything - a book, pint of milk, food, pen - will go to put down the first one you picked up to find a newer one.... Then feel really bad for the other one you put down and go back to that one so it doesn't feel hurt.

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Play as both sides on fifa

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Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

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Flexing your abs when you put on deodorant so you dont look fat

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Forget a seemingly simple word. Shout it out at random 3 days later...(don't tell me you don't do this)

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I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

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Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.

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Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

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Wanting to marry Tyler Joseph but then you remember he's married :(

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I am always SO sure the metal detector or store alarms will go off when I walk through them. –Ikka

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.