Pretend my life is a videogame.

Fantasize about taking over the world, and killing all religious people.

Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.

Hit the off button on the microwave three times to simulate the sound it makes when time is up.

When you can feel yourself blushing so you pretend to be preoccupied with something else.

when im alone and in a bad mood i make stupid faces with my eyes closed and try and figure out how stupid i looked. then i start laughing hysterically because i think that im an idiot. then i repeat this process until i have to pee from laughing so hard because im already in the bathroom so why not utilize the toilet, rather than waiting for a commercial and speed-peeing because im scared that i missed some of the show i was watching :D -Grace-

I HATE minecraft gift codes and the morons who post about them. I wish those morons would get off my planet.

Not wanting to think about something but your brain thinks about it because you are trying not to think about it so much.

Stepping on a LEGO block and instantly screaming and leap onto the bed.

forget i left the light on somewhere in the house and when i see it on i think a ghost did it..

Spend several minutes to write a comment on a website, only to decide not no submit it after all.

In public,try to make eye contact with most people.

speak proper english

text somebody something and if they don't reply quickly, resend that same text.

clean my ears with finger if they feel dirty...eat it.

if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

You pretend to fight imaginary people while no ones looking:/ But you look like the star wars kid...

I have the background on my computer a picture of some cartoon characters,and when I'm alone I talk to the screen like those characters are actually in the room. -Briarwoodninja

It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

I wonder if a blind person knows how colors look?

i always think people can hear my thoughts.

Having a deja vu, swearing you've seen something before.

Eat a biscuit realise how nice it is and eat the whole packet

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.