think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Lay down in bed and close my eyes and pretend that the bed is slowly levitating towards the ceiling. When I open my eyes, the bed is back on the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

I think Lois Griffin on Family Guy is hot!

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Not wanting to think about something but your brain thinks about it because you are trying not to think about it so much.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Stepping on a LEGO block and instantly screaming and leap onto the bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -61

Before posting a comment when you need several consecutive tries to type the words in the box because the lettering is so damn hard to read. But your friend can do it in one try. He got the easy one.

thumb_up thumb_down -61

Make jokes about yourself on the period: "dear god, this is the 5th day I`m bleeding and I`m sill not dead. What kind of monster am I?" ...not funny... :)

thumb_up thumb_down -63

Go up/down the stairs in 10 steps exactly. Talk to an imaginary girlfriend when I'm guilty of something, and she helps me out and holds me till I fall asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -63

Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

thumb_up thumb_down -67

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -79

When I make croissants from the Pillsbury can, I'll take one of the little triangles and eat it, because I like the consistency of dough, and i like the fizzy feeling of the yeast on my tongue.

thumb_up thumb_down -93

when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.

thumb_up thumb_down -95

Pick your dead skin then eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -105

I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Wave my hand at automatic doors just as they open pretending that I have Jedi powers

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Wash my hands after i use the toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I can read people's life's and figure out the truth about them with out them telling me how their life is

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I always have to know exactly what time it is before I go to sleep, just so I can figure out exactly how many hours of sleep I will get.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I wonder do females have morning wood equivalent?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

I use my mobile as a torch and keep hitting random buttons to keep it alight.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

thinking about how you will never understand who in the world thought it was a good idea to spell "Wednesday" like that

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I wonder if old women enjoy sex?

thumb_up thumb_down -24

sometimes i poop in my pants and like the smell of my poop. Smells like whatever i just ate.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.