When you're bored or alone, you think of an argument you had with a friend recently, then think of all the things you should've said and get all powered up inside, but then you realise it's too late -_-

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do math problems in my head while having sex to keep from coming

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because fuck the NSA.

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thinking your pants are wet when you only just sat down for a long time

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Walk next to someone so you don't look too lonely.

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when u get something right and do a victory dance and the person to u is just like "da hell?"

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When I create a situation in my mind where someone is making me mad, then I actually get mad.

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sometimes i poop in my pants and like the smell of my poop. Smells like whatever i just ate.

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Say "what?" when you know what they said, then answer before they can respond. I do it because it takes me a second to figure out what they said and so my immediate response it "what?".

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Pick out an object ahead of me on the footpath and guess which foot will step closest to it

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Put a few bits of toilet paper in the toilet before having a poo so there is no splash!

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Raising your hand in class, and once you're called on, you say, "I forgot."

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Smelling food to see if its spicy.

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

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See a sexy girl, wanna go up and talk to her....cant think of anything cool to say and afraid of denial. Just me?

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When the font allows it, try to hide the cursor in capital I's.

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I read these not only for fun, but to feel in touch with my humanity.

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Remove all the stupid gobbldegook words that the captchas from this site add to my predictive text.

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When i was little i used to see people's cars shaking and wondered why they were listening to a song that just goes "BOOM BOOM BOOM"

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When a person tells you: Oh you like Lana Del Rey? Me:No,I like the wall

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Sometimes if I am by myself at the house or in the car I will act completely insane and absurd. This usually involves me screaming incoherent babble, whole body twitching, making absurd faces and doing this thing where I bite my tongue and shake my head violently. If any normal person saw me they would either think I am having a seizure or currently possessed by Satan.

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pull out a flies wings and let it go

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Spend countless hours looking at cars online I know I'll never be able to afford

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.