I always have to know exactly what time it is before I go to sleep, just so I can figure out exactly how many hours of sleep I will get.

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when in the car with just one parent i get very cautious about what im thinking cuz i feel like they r reading my mind

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Always check the other side of the shower curtain when showering out of fear that someone is on the other side

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I don't like to answer the phone because it is never for me.

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Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

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I like to watch online videos of people and pause the video mid sentence to see the faces they make frozen mid speech

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I really enjoy spending my birthday alone. I never told anyone that.

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When I take a shower, I screw with my iPod for a half an hour "Waiting for the water to warm up".

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Raising your hand in class, and once you're called on, you say, "I forgot."

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thinking about how you will never understand who in the world thought it was a good idea to spell "Wednesday" like that

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When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

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Tally mark everytime I take a shit.

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when you kill a bug you act like a god and yell something before you kill it

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Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie)

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While going to sleep, you turn the pillow downside-up several times to find a cooler surface.

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My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

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Sometimes I won't do something just to see how long it takes before someone else does it (dishes, throw something away, fill the ice cube tray, etc.).

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When reading something on the internet highlighting the words, they don't even have to be what you'r reading just highlighting large sections of the article at random.

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Questioning why they make the Captcha's(spamblocker) SO hard to read

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Play as both sides on fifa

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When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

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Forget a seemingly simple word. Shout it out at random 3 days later...(don't tell me you don't do this)

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Seeing someone gettin roasted for something and then making sure you dont do the same thing.

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call someone by a siblings name.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.