get really paranoid when you're in a shop's changing room and try and make sure the curtain is fully closed so nobody can see in

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Make a little song with tiny breaths out of your nose

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When listening to headphones, I automatically start lip syncing the lyrics... But stop doing it when people look at me funny..

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Put my finger over one pixel of my digital alarm clock, because I know that's the only one that will change in the next minute. Take it off. MAGIC.

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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when you're texting in class and you realize you are staring at your crotch and smiling.

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When you know your alone, you still have to check the whole house.

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Flexing your abs when you put on deodorant so you dont look fat

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i have my own way of eating every chocolate bar i eat, layer by layer

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When in the shower dread putting the shower gel on you chest as it is freezing!!!

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twirl your penis in a cirlce and make the woo woo sound

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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Get excited when your friends think your favorite song is cool.

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My daily agenda: wake up take a crap get out of bed...

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When a person tells you: Oh you like Lana Del Rey? Me:No,I like the wall

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Pretend my life is a videogame.

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Scratch my scalp and look around the place if there is someone watching me (if no one does) quickly smell my fingers

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When I walk past a homeless person asking for change, I avoid looking them in the eye and walk faster.

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If I have to put the garbage out at night I sprint back into the house so the monsters don't get me

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I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

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Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

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Watch scary movies even though your afraid of the dark.

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~When you turn around, somebody is already looking at you; something is probably on your face. (I know they look at you because you would look at anybody turning around, but I just hate it)

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Think your teacher is super hot and have a hard time concentrating in class . . . for the whole year.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.