When Im going to sleep , I try to think of good things so I wont think of scary things

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Archer's Pam poovey, Lana Kane and Malory makes me horny

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When reading something on the internet highlighting the words, they don't even have to be what you'r reading just highlighting large sections of the article at random.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

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After waking up from being extremely intoxicated the night before, i check my phone and ALL my accounts on the internet to make sure i didnt make an ass of myself.

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When a person tells you: Oh you like Lana Del Rey? Me:No,I like the wall

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Sometimes if I am by myself at the house or in the car I will act completely insane and absurd. This usually involves me screaming incoherent babble, whole body twitching, making absurd faces and doing this thing where I bite my tongue and shake my head violently. If any normal person saw me they would either think I am having a seizure or currently possessed by Satan.

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When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

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Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

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Vote for the other guy

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I am always SO sure the metal detector or store alarms will go off when I walk through them. –Ikka

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Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

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Lay down in bed and close my eyes and pretend that the bed is slowly levitating towards the ceiling. When I open my eyes, the bed is back on the ground.

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When someones talking to a group of people that I'm in and says something bad that I do but think nobody else does, I stand perfectly still and don't blink and breath as quietly as possible until the next subject arrives.

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Think about breathing...

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Whenever I'm in the shower, I never close my eyes because I think someones gonna kill me

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Think about Facebook chats when your offline!? P.S Am I the only one, REALLY!

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I hate when people say for example,if something is $3.99 they say its four dollars.

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I'm not a pessimist I'm a realist.

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collect kleenex boxes for the cool designs

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When serving grilled steak, I always make sure I get the best one.

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When I go to the shops I like to park my car next to a specific coloured car so I can find it afterwards.

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Leave coins on the floor in the corner when I have a party to see if there is a petty thief around

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.