i put a empty pack of cigarettes under my pillow and hoped the cigarette fairy would come when i was asleep

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Seeing someone gettin roasted for something and then making sure you dont do the same thing.

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Simultaneously apply pressure to my ears to make the surrounding noises sound weird Tristan J.

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Sometimes if I am by myself at the house or in the car I will act completely insane and absurd. This usually involves me screaming incoherent babble, whole body twitching, making absurd faces and doing this thing where I bite my tongue and shake my head violently. If any normal person saw me they would either think I am having a seizure or currently possessed by Satan.

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I am always SO sure the metal detector or store alarms will go off when I walk through them. –Ikka

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Trying not to fart when laughing is challenging.

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daydream/pretend i'm in a story. pretend to be a new person in a movie where all the cool main characters are my friends, add to the movie with my own story and add twists and make it my own.

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Before getting in the shower, staring at your naked body, thinking your sexy.

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when playing games like grand theft auto I drive normally like all the other people in the game when i'm bored

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When serving grilled steak, I always make sure I get the best one.

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Pretend animals talk to you!

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forget i left the light on somewhere in the house and when i see it on i think a ghost did it..

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Having the tv on always, just for background noise. Doesn't work with a computer/laptop, must be the tv.

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say "ow" when your character in a video game gets hurt

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while i'm doing something,i think a suitable soundtrack for it.

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I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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Having a deja vu, swearing you've seen something before.

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I pee in the shower. :3

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I save my files as "askjaskjaks" because I'm too lazy to give them a proper name.

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think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

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Almost every time someone tells me something sad I have to fight the urge to grin.

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Sometimes, I have a hard time looking people I know in the eyes but have no trouble looking strangers in the eyes. I wish I knew why. Help!

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If I have a top comment and I see someone else does, I upvote both of ours; friendly competition.

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When you know your alone, you still have to check the whole house.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.