Roll my eyes with them closed when I am annoyed with someone

I used to be the third most useless invention in the world, and now I am so sad, I mean I lost to a square wheel! Moral: On the bright side, ill never be as useless as Rustin Beaver.

Being afraid to close your eyes when you're washing your hair in the shower because you think a murderer will be right there when you open your eyes again. That or Scared to shower when your home alone at night.

How is it that celebrities no one likes keep popping up on shows everyone likes

if your behind glass or a window and you see a group outside, imagine their conversation.

Wave my hand at automatic doors just as they open pretending that I have Jedi powers

spank it during my commute if I am in traffic

When I use the bathroom at school, I keep the door open with the kickstand and use the stall. It's because I fear that one day, when I'm all alone in the bathroom with the door closed, the fire alarm will go off and scare the living crap out of me. This trick backfires when someone comes in without closing the door and uses the urinal.

I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

Decide to think about important things in the shower, but continually lose the train of thought and eventually give up.

I always have to know exactly what time it is before I go to sleep, just so I can figure out exactly how many hours of sleep I will get.

When I was younger I used to challenge myself with touching the roof I would first jump and see if I could touch it then I would try and see how long I can touch it and now every once in a while I just touch it and think of how far I have come.

Make a little song with tiny breaths out of your nose

When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

when going through this website only read post that have 2 or more thumbs up

Imagine that other people can see what im doing, then try to act differently.

Playing with a tiny piece of loose skin in the middle of my upper lip.

Pour the cheap shampoo I can only afford these days into the empty expensive bottle to trick myself I'm still using the good stuff.

Smelling food to see if its spicy.

When Im going to sleep , I try to think of good things so I wont think of scary things

I look behind me and out of my window every 10 minutes while I'm sitting at my desk because I'm scared something's gonna be there.

It's hot but I still have on covers

Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.