When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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sometimes i poop in my pants and like the smell of my poop. Smells like whatever i just ate.

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Trace the letters on the front of your textbooks with your finger.

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right before I go to sleep, I think about a certain situation. so I will dream about that

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While watching a movie, I hold my breath whenever there is a scene with the main character underwater just to see how long i would last in that situation.

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When I'm in the shower I act like I'm filming a music video.

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Trying on other people's clothes at the gym/laundromat when they ain't looking!! (^_^)

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Watching a movie with bugs in it and instantly feeling that shivery 'holy sh*t there are bugs on me' feeling.

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having cool friends, but all their other friends are nerds.

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I sometimes start moving my hands around "making them fight" pretending they are tiny fighters.

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I look behind me and out of my window every 10 minutes while I'm sitting at my desk because I'm scared something's gonna be there.

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I tell inanimate objects what to do.

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Wanting to be the Walmart baby model as a kid ^_^

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I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.

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Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

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i put a empty pack of cigarettes under my pillow and hoped the cigarette fairy would come when i was asleep

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when you get a runny nose suddenly checks for blood oh good its clear

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When a person tells you: Oh you like Lana Del Rey? Me:No,I like the wall

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When you can feel yourself blushing so you pretend to be preoccupied with something else.

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When I walk past a homeless person asking for change, I avoid looking them in the eye and walk faster.

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sing like a pro in da shower

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It is really difficult for me to lose control of myself

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Take advantage of loud traffic to fart really hard.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.