I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

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Moving my bottom jaw around slightly makes me feel like I have dog-like ears and I'm moving them around.

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Take advantage of loud traffic to fart really hard.

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Am I not the one who created an imaginary BAE?

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Roll my eyes with them closed when I am annoyed with someone

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Think your teacher is super hot and have a hard time concentrating in class . . . for the whole year.

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At school I go along with the norm even though inside I HATE it!!!!

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say "ow" when your character in a video game gets hurt

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How is it that celebrities no one likes keep popping up on shows everyone likes

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Text random people saying I'm pregnant

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Consume skin around finger nails. Cuticle too.

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This is kind of embarrassing... after I watched "Truman Show" I went home and talked to my mirror like Jim Carrey does in the film.

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Sometimes I try to solve a math problem using my finger and my thigh, and when I make a mistake a erase it with my hand.

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Having a deja vu, swearing you've seen something before.

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if your behind glass or a window and you see a group outside, imagine their conversation.

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Putting salt on dry toast, yum!

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Cover up the webcam on my laptop because I think someone might be watching me through it.

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Stepping on a concrete sidewalk square the exact amount of times as the others.

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thinking about how you will never understand who in the world thought it was a good idea to spell "Wednesday" like that

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Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.

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moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

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Press cancel on your toaster before it finishes so that you can eat faster

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Trying on other people's clothes at the gym/laundromat when they ain't looking!! (^_^)

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.