Doing a little dance after having sex because your so proud you're a FATHER!!! - Uncle Jerrett

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Sometimes I worry that my life is just someones dream and that I'm not real.

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Click my teeth from side to side at the beat of songs

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Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

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Always run up the stairs as if someone was chasing you.

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I wonder if a blind person knows how colors look?

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Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

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Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

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Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

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going to bed at 10:30 pm realize i have to check Facebook go to YouTube randomly watch 2 hours of nothing, then find my self pulling an all nighter cause its 4 am and i got school.

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never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

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I fill my bathtub up with marinara and then sit curled up in it and pretend that I am a meatball.

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I know it is pointless but still hope to get THUMBS UP

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Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

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Smoking a cigarette on the toilet and then accidentally ashing directly into your panties. Everytime.

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i fap in the bathroom because its the only room i have a reason to lock the door in.

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sometimes i poop in my pants and like the smell of my poop. Smells like whatever i just ate.

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When you sit down to use the toilet, start, and then realize that the window is open and people can hear you.You then either search for something to mask the sound or proceed to relieve yourself by making as little noise as possible (ultimately failing)

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place all your achievements in your room to impress your friends

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Put my finger over one pixel of my digital alarm clock, because I know that's the only one that will change in the next minute. Take it off. MAGIC.

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Count how many steps there are in a stairwell I use often and then try to take it by same number each time... Eg if there are 16 then always go by twos and missing the others!?!?!?

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My daily agenda: wake up take a crap get out of bed...

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Talk out loud so my brother can hear me because no one ever wrote that they can read your minds. And i want him to know ineed him in my life still so I randomly say things out loud to him on accident. People always look at me with hidden shock wide eyed.

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jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.