When I Was Little I Always Slept On My Stomach Even If I Wasn't Comfortable Because I Thought It Would Be Harder For Aliens To Abduct Me.

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Sometimes I think about what I would do if I accidentally killed someone. I don't want to kill anyone, but if I did it accidentally. Would I call an ambulance, hide the body, confess to police, destroy evidence, etc?

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Take advantage of loud traffic to fart really hard.

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Am I not the one who created an imaginary BAE?

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Everytime I have ear buds in and I hear myself breathing, I think others can hear it too so I slow my breathing or hold my breath.

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when i piss in the toilet, i flush half way through and race the toilet to the finish.

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This is kind of embarrassing... after I watched "Truman Show" I went home and talked to my mirror like Jim Carrey does in the film.

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After eating a banana I leave the last bit that was in the bottom

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think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

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Pee in the shower

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Whenever I have to carry a heavy box with both hands a long distance, my nose decides it's going to itchy.

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when a sex scene comes on the tv i try make up an excuse to go somewhere like i need a drink or a pee.

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When I create a situation in my mind where someone is making me mad, then I actually get mad.

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I sometimes deliberately missed buses and trains even if I could easily board them.

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I really enjoy spending my birthday alone. I never told anyone that.

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Doing something private and think "What if my mom/dad/boss etc. saw me now?"

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I like to watch online videos of people and pause the video mid sentence to see the faces they make frozen mid speech

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When in a public bathroom and others are in there, pretend to fix your clothes/hair until everyone has left before you use it.

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Press cancel on your toaster before it finishes so that you can eat faster

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get really paranoid when you're in a shop's changing room and try and make sure the curtain is fully closed so nobody can see in

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When listening to headphones, I automatically start lip syncing the lyrics... But stop doing it when people look at me funny..

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A lot of times I'll make up reasons for why different things happen even though I really have absolutely no idea.

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When in the shower dread putting the shower gel on you chest as it is freezing!!!

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.