- Things You Think Only You Do

Sit at your desk at work and think to yourself "is this it? I feel like I was meant for something bigger, like being an actor or a real life hero." then you look around you and feel bad because you feel like you dumped on everyone else who seem happy wih their lives. Then you go back to your boring desk job anyway.

Archer's Pam poovey, Lana Kane and Malory makes me horny

Touch something dirty with one hand then wash it but then wash the other hand cause it feels weird when it's not wet like your other hand.

Thinking of something but got distracted for a few seconds. After that, I forgot what was I thinking about.

I always feel like i have to eat something while watching a movie that I've seen so many times.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

think up the funniest jokes right before i go to sleep and cant think of them the next day

Simultaneously apply pressure to my ears to make the surrounding noises sound weird Tristan J.

Whenever I go to the toilet on an airplane I worry that during the time I'm there the plane will drop out the sky.

I'll imagine that I'm having a conversation with a celebrity, and either giving them advice or telling them why I hate them and calling them out on bullshit.

Showering with my uncle Jarrett <3

When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

When I hear something that I could make a great comeback to (if it was directed towards me), I saw it under my breath just to feel full fiilled

Go up/down the stairs in 10 steps exactly. Talk to an imaginary girlfriend when I'm guilty of something, and she helps me out and holds me till I fall asleep.

I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

I play out romantic scenarios with myself when I'm alone. We're talking full-blown just straight up talking out loud- to myself, of course. It's not that I'm lonely or anything since I did this when I had a boyfriend anyway (just to clarify, it didn't end because of this XD.) I really just feel like doing it because it's really friggin' entertaining. If you've never done it, well... it's basically like being in a really crappy, low budget soap opera, with a plot that doesn't make any damn sense, staring you as every character and the audience. That's basically the only way I could describe it lol.

YEET! TURN UP! KEEP IT ONEHUNNIT DADDY!! YAS GAGA YASS!! SIGN ME UP FOR THAT!! PU$$Y ON FLEEK!! PULLOUT GAME STRONG! LARRY IS REAL!! IMMA LET YOU FINISH!! IMMA REAL G! HOLYMOTHERFUCKINGSHIT!!!!!! I SAID HA! BITCH WHERE??? GIVE ME SOME ASS!! WHAT ARE THOOOSE!!! WHERE THEY AT THO?! BITCH BETTA HAVE MUH MONEY! FCK HER RIGHT IN THE PSSY! EAT THAT BOOTY LIKE GROCERIES!!!!! SURFBOARD! IM NOT GAY NO MORE! WHO'S YOUR DADDY? HOW YOU LIKE DEM APPLES?!! QUEEN! SLAY!

Normally I can do a specific task no problem but when someone is watching and I know that they are watching I screw up.

Think about all of the germs that are on restroom doors and water taps.

I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

Watching movies about couples with age gaps and woundering how it would feel like to be with somebody much older (or younger) than you. Would they use viagra or would you not even try to have sex with someone so old and delicate?

I think of doing something productive, but can't work up the motivation and end up on the internet instead.

When it is raining and a sad song comes on the radio, I look out the window and pretend I am in a movie. -Cocobear

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.