I wear my boxers so I can poop through the pee hole

I always have to know exactly what time it is before I go to sleep, just so I can figure out exactly how many hours of sleep I will get.

when you have just ended a argument with someone and you think what else you could of said that would have been better to say

Cover up the webcam on my laptop because I think someone might be watching me through it.

I save my files as "askjaskjaks" because I'm too lazy to give them a proper name.

sometimes i poop in my pants and like the smell of my poop. Smells like whatever i just ate.

play my ipod all night till my eyes hurt

When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

Watching a movie with bugs in it and instantly feeling that shivery 'holy sh*t there are bugs on me' feeling.

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When your alone in the house you walk around naked even though there is no point

Flexing your abs when you put on deodorant so you dont look fat

I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.

Search for blackheads on your arms for hours just because youre bored!

When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

Pee while setting down even if your a dude.

i put a empty pack of cigarettes under my pillow and hoped the cigarette fairy would come when i was asleep

Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.

When I walk past a homeless person asking for change, I avoid looking them in the eye and walk faster.

Sometimes I would just be thinking to myself and then think of something funny and laugh but I don't share it with anyone else makes me look insane.

I no longer trust any of my local news because they appear to have an agenda

I HATE minecraft gift codes and the morons who post about them. I wish those morons would get off my planet.

Boinked my neighbor

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.