Think that If I leave a big knife out on the counter- or a pair of tights/belt/scarf out in view, I believe that ultimately someone will break in and kill me via the aforementioned items.................and I will only have myself to blame.

thumb_up thumb_down -75

Having the tv on always, just for background noise. Doesn't work with a computer/laptop, must be the tv.

thumb_up thumb_down -93

Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

thumb_up thumb_down -117

after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

I sometimes put posts not just of things I do but also of things I know other people do

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Start thinking about my blinking and feel that I am blinking weird

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I don't like just killing bugs in my home so what I do is I would catch them in a tissue and flush them down my toilet

thumb_up thumb_down -20

think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

thumb_up thumb_down -22

When I take a shower, I screw with my iPod for a half an hour "Waiting for the water to warm up".

thumb_up thumb_down -22

When watching television, I give people I don't like the finger

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Sometimes when I'm watching a sitcom, I get distracted from the jokes because the characters are in a bedroom and I start focusing on the awesome stuff they have.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Think about having sex with the dog. You wouldn't, but what if you did?

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Archer's Pam poovey, Lana Kane and Malory makes me horny

thumb_up thumb_down -34

When reading something on the internet highlighting the words, they don't even have to be what you'r reading just highlighting large sections of the article at random.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

My dreams are almost always bizarre in some way - the only time they're ever normal is when they're the premonition type, and then they're about completely uneventful things but accurate down to the tiniest detail.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

thumb_up thumb_down -36

I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Really really happy that resisted getting a facebook or twitter account

thumb_up thumb_down -38

You like to think about how your favorite characters would react if you told them that they were fictional.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Search for blackheads on your arms for hours just because youre bored!

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.