- Things You Think Only You Do

sometimes when i fart i feel like i pooped a little in my underwear but tell myself ''no i didn't'' but feel poopy until i check.

I combine every item on my plate in all the possible ways, then i eat the worst part of the meal and save the best part til last.

I try to sympathize when some celebrity butthole has problems but, I can't.

When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

Walking around on the streets wondering if you are really walking in place, and the earth is spinning according to how you walk, like a treadmill.

Just ocassionally stand up and pontlessly walk around the house when using the computer. Anyone?

sometimes i poop in my pants and like the smell of my poop. Smells like whatever i just ate.

Thinking something embarrassing, then having to talk to someone and suddenly getting worried you are about to blurt out your thoughts

When alone at home turn on all the lights before it gets darker.

Smoking a cigarette on the toilet and then accidentally ashing directly into your panties. Everytime.

Sometimes I'll say quotes from movies or TV shows out loud to myself.

I always feel like i have to eat something while watching a movie that I've seen so many times.

in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

While in bed, I cover my head with my bed sheets because it makes me feel safe from monsters.

I rearrange books, movies, etc. in the correct alphabetical order in the fiction section of my public library, other people's houses, classrooms at school, etc. Sometimes this process takes a very long time.

I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

Saying an awkward word enough times so that it doesn't sound like a real word anymore

Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

if I see submissions above mine get thumbs up but not mine I will put them down

Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

Lay down in bed and close my eyes and pretend that the bed is slowly levitating towards the ceiling. When I open my eyes, the bed is back on the ground.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.