When I am drinking coffee and I am nearly finished I swish the coffee to get the last of the sugar

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Wave my hand at automatic doors just as they open pretending that I have Jedi powers

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When realizing i'm being a little bitchy, I laugh and smile right after my sentence to make myself seem a little nicer.

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Thinking you can do parkour even when you cant and the have a friend over and try to show off

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make sure you hit every crack in the sidewalk evenly. slowly over time, you discover that you found an awkward walking pace to match the obsession.

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When I'm around people, I sometimes yell in my head "STOP READING MY MIND! I KNOW YOU'RE DOING IT, SO STOP!" just in case.

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moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

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When you sit down to use the toilet, start, and then realize that the window is open and people can hear you.You then either search for something to mask the sound or proceed to relieve yourself by making as little noise as possible (ultimately failing)

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When I meet someone random, and have a small conversation, and then when they leave, I feel sad because I think I am never going to see them again.

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Talks to yourself in your head then replies to yourself out loud nikki

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When alone at home turn on all the lights before it gets darker.

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Skip the first 3 minutes of "Free Bird" because it's too slow.

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I deeply pick my nose with tweezers. It's like the relief of pooping to me.

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When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

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When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

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Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

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Singing alone in the car and then stopping, scared that there is an audio recorder in the car recording you singing.

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see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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Trying not to fart when laughing is challenging.

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I like wet humping better than f*cking. but sometimes it slips in anyway, and it's that's pretty enjoyable too. and mt girlfriend is cool with. ... so it's actualy pretty whatevs either way. but wet humping is my jam.

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You feel like someone can read your mind so you try not to think about stupid stuff.

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Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.