twirl your penis in a cirlce and make the woo woo sound

thumb_up thumb_down -36

I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

thumb_up thumb_down -36

When Im going to sleep , I try to think of good things so I wont think of scary things

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Only read the shortest sentences on "Things You Think Only You Do". More than 2 sentences I skip.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Sometimes if I am by myself at the house or in the car I will act completely insane and absurd. This usually involves me screaming incoherent babble, whole body twitching, making absurd faces and doing this thing where I bite my tongue and shake my head violently. If any normal person saw me they would either think I am having a seizure or currently possessed by Satan.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

When a person tells you: Oh you like Lana Del Rey? Me:No,I like the wall

thumb_up thumb_down -48

If I have to put the garbage out at night I sprint back into the house so the monsters don't get me

thumb_up thumb_down -50

google search random thoughts you have to see if they pop up.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

After brushing my teeth I used to suck the water from it

thumb_up thumb_down -54

When something says "I have read and agree to the terms of service" I quickly skim through it nd act like I read it.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Pretend my life is a videogame.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

I like to record the audio from TV shows and movies onto cassette tapes from my stereo, and listen to them on my Walkman while I'm working in the kitchen or around the house.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Listen to song and think of a great montage that would go with it.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

When I Was Little I Always Slept On My Stomach Even If I Wasn't Comfortable Because I Thought It Would Be Harder For Aliens To Abduct Me.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

When listening to music via headphones in public, I become paranoid that I am bothering everyone around me as my breathing becomes louder without me realising.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

When bored you watch the minute hand on a clock and try to see if you can see it move

thumb_up thumb_down -68

Watch scary movies even though your afraid of the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down -72

Am I not the one who created an imaginary BAE?

thumb_up thumb_down -76

Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

thumb_up thumb_down -88

skipping back to the start of the guitar solo over and over so I can pretend I'm playing it

thumb_up thumb_down +25

While listening to music, I take my headphones off to make sure nobody else can hear it.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

When bored in School, I like to imagine what I would do at that exact moment if a Zombie Apocalypse started.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.