I push the door open with my stomach

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You try to tell a joke to impress everyone and then you mess it up.

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Hope that one day your closet will have a secret world like Narnia...

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when in the car with just one parent i get very cautious about what im thinking cuz i feel like they r reading my mind

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When I take a shower, I screw with my iPod for a half an hour "Waiting for the water to warm up".

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Always check the other side of the shower curtain when showering out of fear that someone is on the other side

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i wonder why someone decided to spell words unusually for example why couldn't because be spelt becuz the way it sounds?!

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When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

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When I drive I cut corners even at low speeds so that the people behind me think I am experienced race car driver.

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When Im going to sleep , I try to think of good things so I wont think of scary things

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I look behind me and out of my window every 10 minutes while I'm sitting at my desk because I'm scared something's gonna be there.

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Play as both sides on fifa

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Skip the first 3 minutes of "Free Bird" because it's too slow.

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i put a empty pack of cigarettes under my pillow and hoped the cigarette fairy would come when i was asleep

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I have won so many competitions online for things like being the 99, 999th visitor on the site

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See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

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Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

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I am always SO sure the metal detector or store alarms will go off when I walk through them. –Ikka

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Whilst passing a mega dump or room clearer as my brother calls them I come up with songs...sometimes in spanish

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I HATE minecraft gift codes and the morons who post about them. I wish those morons would get off my planet.

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Sick the top of you fingers in your pants when you are doing something that requires one hand, like watching t.v

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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My brother (who is 2 years younger) and I have our own language, consisting of movie quotes and silly stuff we made up when we were little. We speak it with abandon when we're alone, and try as hard as we can to suppress it when we're with a friend. But sometimes some of it slips out, and the friend looks at us like he's the guy who isn't in on the joke; I always get the feeling he or she thinks the two of us are crazy. By the way, if you're the third person in company with two close siblings who are speaking their own secret language, don't ask them to explain or look at them like they're crazy. They're not nuts, and you won't understand, even if they try to explain. Just let it pass.

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thinking your pants are wet when you only just sat down for a long time

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.