Look at my poop before flushing

Raising your hand in class, and once you're called on, you say, "I forgot."

Imagine that other people can see what im doing, then try to act differently.

Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

A lot of times I'll make up reasons for why different things happen even though I really have absolutely no idea.

I always feel chinese accents are unintelligent.

Find that the kettle has recently been used and still contains hot water so decide to have a cup of tea just so that boiling that water wasn't a waste. Think that it might have cooled down by now. Reboil the water.

When reading something on the internet highlighting the words, they don't even have to be what you'r reading just highlighting large sections of the article at random.

Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

You like to think about how your favorite characters would react if you told them that they were fictional.

When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

Whenever someone dies I try to guess who will die next so I wont be as shocked

When I'm laying in bed and I feel my heartbeat, I turn around so I can't feel it because it makes me feel sick.

Pass wind after i ate lasagna.

Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.

smile when you find out that the things you only do is right.

When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

collect kleenex boxes for the cool designs

Pretend animals talk to you!

Think that If I leave a big knife out on the counter- or a pair of tights/belt/scarf out in view, I believe that ultimately someone will break in and kill me via the aforementioned items.................and I will only have myself to blame.

Leave coins on the floor in the corner when I have a party to see if there is a petty thief around

Having the tv on always, just for background noise. Doesn't work with a computer/laptop, must be the tv.

When the toilet paper falls to the floor, I quickly roll it again so nobody notices it.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.