Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie)

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Tally mark everytime I take a shit.

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Think about having sex with the dog. You wouldn't, but what if you did?

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I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

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A lot of times I'll make up reasons for why different things happen even though I really have absolutely no idea.

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When i close the refrigiator door, i re-open it and give it a good shove to make sure it tight.

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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Every time I see people's bare feet I'm automatically counting their toes to make sure if they have an extra toe or two.

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When your at your friends house and they run out of toilet paper, so you sit there like "what do i do now?"

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When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

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smile when you find out that the things you only do is right.

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See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

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Normally I can do a specific task no problem but when someone is watching and I know that they are watching I screw up.

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Pretend animals talk to you!

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Think that If I leave a big knife out on the counter- or a pair of tights/belt/scarf out in view, I believe that ultimately someone will break in and kill me via the aforementioned items.................and I will only have myself to blame.

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Think your teacher is super hot and have a hard time concentrating in class . . . for the whole year.

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I chew around the center of carrots.

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Sick the top of you fingers in your pants when you are doing something that requires one hand, like watching t.v

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Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

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When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

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Always run up the stairs as if someone was chasing you.

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Consume skin around finger nails. Cuticle too.

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worry about other people hearing you pee when your in the bathroom.

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Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.