Dutch oven myself when I'm lying in bed trying to sleep

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When I'm about to fart, I close my butthole with cupped hand to smell my own fart. Sometimes after I fart, I bend down just to smell the scent.

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I get mad at characters on tv and i shoot the screen with my Nerf gun

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Really really happy that resisted getting a facebook or twitter account

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you collect best whatsapp status for your whatsapp and facebook at techcloud7.org

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(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

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Skip the first 3 minutes of "Free Bird" because it's too slow.

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Before I sing in the car, I always have to make sure I haven’t accidently butt-dialed anyone. –Ikka

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Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

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You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

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Walking around on the streets wondering if you are really walking in place, and the earth is spinning according to how you walk, like a treadmill.

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I like to think I'm a Lion or cat.

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I eat ass

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If im eating food i shouldnt and i dont want anybody to know i jump if anyone comes in and catches me.

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So has anyone else ever been in the middle of doing something and at the exact moment something happens and you sort of wonder if it happened because of what you did.

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When I'm alone with my pet, sometimes we just sit down and stare at each each other for a minute or two

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Start browsing a list of pics at the back, so I can see the order they were posted.

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My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

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When I'm in the shower, I talk to myself, usually about my plans for video game procedures.

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Tells a joke only you thought was funny and still laughs then laughs harder because your the only one laughing nikki

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Smelling your armpits to see if you smell and then disguising at as yawn/stretch

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Pubic hair wishes... While on the toilet you try to pull out a hair... If it comes out close your eyes and make a wish....and throw it into the toilet... Flush... Repeat!

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Pick your dead skin then eat it.

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Randomly think odd scenarios in your head and say if that happened this is what i would do and then forget about it the next day

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.