When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

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I tell inanimate objects what to do.

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I make different scenarios for different songs I listen to. I pretend the walls and couches are people. I talk to them.

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Every time I open a door, I shout out "Alohamora!" and then I open it.

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I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

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I hate it whenever i hear Manny Paquiao saying "you know" in every interviews he make. Am i the only one who notice it?

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Rubbing your scalp and watching your dandruff fall like snowflakes

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pick nose in car and realize people can see you when stopped at a red light

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I always write b as d or d as b since I've learned the alphabet, and i hate my keyboarb cuz its on lower case every time.

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Feeling self conscious about breathing to loudly

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as soon as i put some mint gum in my mouth, i sneeze countless times.

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Cover up the webcam on my laptop because I think someone might be watching me through it.

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draw pictures on the mirror from the shower steam

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I sometimes deliberately missed buses and trains even if I could easily board them.

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Sometimes when I'm all alone, I like to rub vasceline on myself and pretend I'm a slug.

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Sometimes I stop typing in the middle of a sen

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Read this site's posts, think of something awesome to write but then forget it because you decided to read more and finish the page rather than write it immediately.

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When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...

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when i was i kid i use to do the balloon trick where you rubit on your head then when there is enough put it on a wooden floor and while it's followin me i put my hands out and pretended that i was controlling it

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Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

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Feel like you're the only one pressured into giving gum away by your friends.

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having cool friends, but all of their other friends are nerds.

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Realizes there is less toilet paper than first thought. Hobbles across bathroom to find more. Failure. Take shower.

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On true/false sections of tests, I get paranoid if there are not the same amount of trues and falses.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.