turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

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Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

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The ability to go one hour back in time by concentrating really hard for two hours.

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When you're alone in a room and you have to turn on the TV so it's not as silent...

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play my ipod all night till my eyes hurt

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suddenly get stage fright when in a public bathroom stall and break the awkward silence by pretending you just went in there to get loo paper to blow your nose.

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I kick my shoes off, sending them flying to various parts of the room. I then pick them up and place them neatly beside each other

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Make jokes about yourself on the period: "dear god, this is the 5th day I`m bleeding and I`m sill not dead. What kind of monster am I?" ...not funny... :)

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Whenever I fall over I always seem to think coherently throughout the fall about what can I do to make this less painful

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when looking at a reflection of myself, i try to do it as fast as i can before the reflection does something i didnt

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Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

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Run back into your room when your microwaving something

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whenever I see those commercials where there is two people talking to each other but they constantly look at me it really irritates me

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When I do something stupid and people are around I hope that nobody saw me and I never tell anyone what I did. But if i do something stupid and I am alone I feel I have to tell somebody.

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I tend to stand in front of mirrors and stare at myself to the point of my face changing to a more evil look than normal and freaking myself out, and forcing myself to either look away, or down.

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think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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Spend several minutes to write a comment on a website, only to decide not no submit it after all.

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Likes that girggle sound you make after a burp.

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i put a empty pack of cigarettes under my pillow and hoped the cigarette fairy would come when i was asleep

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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Get excited when your friends think your favorite song is cool.

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because fuck the NSA.

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Typing what you want to put in a message, then deleting it because you daren't send it

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.