Having small fingers and, regardless, still unable to click on the right thing when on the internet with a touch screen phone.

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Check your analog watch, wait for it to strike a minute, then look away and try to count 60 seconds out in your head before you look again. However many seconds you were away is your new record.

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I wipe the part of the glass or water bottle i drink from

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pull out a flies wings and let it go

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I ejaculate fire and glory

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When I'm in the shower i let the water run off my arms and fingers and pretend I'm a giant god of water sending torrents to the miniature people below.

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I will look up the definition of a word in a text message before I use it just incase I'm using it in the wrong context.

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Think of the best come-backs ever, a few seconds after the time to use them would be.

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feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

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I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

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Always think "what if ghosts really ARE everywhere?" when I'm naked in the shower, or getting dressed, or any other private and/or embarrassing moment. Then get really freaked out and picture 6 people from 1902 watching you.

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I pretend that my actions are perceived by a past self and they're always astounded by the change I've gone through.

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as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

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The last meal I have before I get on a plane - I think about how it is food in one city and will be crapped out in another.

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interview yourself over some amazing accomplishment you achieved like becoming the youngest emmy winner and pretending you're really humble.

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While listening to music, I imagine an insanely huge dance number to go along with it.

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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if your listening to music, move the volume up and down to experience the bass a lil better

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Walk into a public bathroom and go to the urinal, but then stop and think theres some guy who will perv on you and then go in the cubicle.

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i feel all weird and sad when i thing about my old belongings.

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I turn on the faucet or turn up the radio in the bathroom so maybe no one can hear me pee.

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There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

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I want to suck on your penis

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Happy April 28th everyone! Today is the first day of the rest of your lives, a time for new beginnings to run wild, a time to put a final ending to the past mistakes and troubling thoughts that may have been clouding your mind for far too long until now... The time is here, The time is now, Today is the day, Right here, right now, Right this moment, This is the right time... This, IS THE TIME TO DECIDE... To take time to make time, and let time pass by while you try to decide on how you wanna live your life? Falling into the same patterns as time before, and as will be, time after time? OR, simply, you can choose to LIVE... letting yourself have the time of YOUR LIFE!!! =) The choice is yours, what will you decide??? <3

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.