Sometimes hold a piece of chocolate between your fingers until it melts then lick the yummy gooeyness off your fingers

Go to get a drink and by the time you get there you already forgot what you were doing.

when i watch tv and it cuts to break, if i hear someone on the tv tell me not to change the chanel, ill say "u cant tell me what to do!" and then ill change it.

I have always belived that I invented calling Target " Tar- jhay"

When the T.V switches to commercial sometimes I forget what I was watching Noel

When I'm about to go to the bathroom, I think of a million things that I have to do and try to do them all before I pee my pants.

fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

Clenching your teeth subconsciously, then wondering why your teeth hurt so much afterwards.

Wonder why there are sites like this.

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Reading a book and making the facial expressions it describes.

I am wearing ear buds even though I'm not actually listening to anything.

i want to FAWK the SHYT out of that girl

Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

Sometimes I imagine how everyone would react if I died.

okay,So we bought a 1000 piece puzzle and made a point to put it together when it was done we found that it was missing a piece so we went back to the same store bought the same puzzle and went through it until we found the missing piece then returned it.

Picking your dogs booger for him/her

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

Turn on Fox News and wonder if I'm watching a bad comedy routine or news reporting.

I replace every word of a song with the name of my pet

Am i the only one who noticed that the title of this page has a grammatical error?

Pretending you don't know that much about something because other people might think it would be wierd if you did. Ex: if you you knew someone's exact birthdate and you were discussing it with some one and you where like ya he looks a little older he's probably in his mid 40s or early 50s instead of just admitting you know there exact age.

I actually get stuck watching those rediculous infomercials late at night... Yeah - you're not alone. But no, I don't buy anything either... Lol.

Eat a biscuit realise how nice it is and eat the whole packet

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.