Whenever I go to close the door to my room, I give the wall opposite me a hard, intimidating stare just in case an invisible person was watching me.

I read your stuff at the interwebs and think "sons, I am disappoint" Moral: Lol, I just might be your father you know... But that does not mean you disappoint me anymore, I kinda expect your worst? Best? I mean... Are you doing your worst on purpose? WOW!

Convince yourself that all of your friends are partying together without you when they dont respond to your text messages.

strt thinking about something spinning, then cant stop no matter how hard you try.

When I'm reading a book and I come to a word that is long or difficult to pronounce every time I come to that word again I pronounce it 'manamanam'.

Am I the only one that thinks of things, and force yourself to not to think about it, then you hear people laugh or go "OHHHH" so you think that you said your thoughts out loud and everyone heard?

When I watch porn,I sometimes pause the video and start looking something random. e.g. an unrelated article on Wikipedia.

Wait 2-3 seconds with anticipation whenever a baby falls for them to cry.

I wonder if old women enjoy sex?

When boarding the escalator, I select a specific step before getting on causing a slight queue.

Never write LOL on a text message, because you don't want to sound too extreme

i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

pull the poo out of my butt when im too impatient to push it out

Stop at traffic lights thinking it will close soon, when actually remains only 5s to close second and u run like crazy.

Look at a word long enough to not seem like a word anymore, then sounding weird.

Make jokes about yourself on the period: "dear god, this is the 5th day I`m bleeding and I`m sill not dead. What kind of monster am I?" ...not funny... :)

That feeling you get where you slip on something but you save yourself just in time and your just like "holy crap, i almost cracked my head and died," then two minutes later your legs are still shaking

masturbate... with condoms and gloves because male genitalia is gross and clean up takes just a few seconds rather than minutes

I want to trade bodies and thought processes with my crush, so we could understand each other better.

I see some one I have a crush on in the hallway and I walk towards them and brush my arm against them and be like OMG I TOUCHED HER!

Whenever I go to a new place, I look around and carefully plan my escape route in case of zombies.

wake up in the middle of the night and write your dream if you like it. Or just write all night and dont sleep all night for days at a time.

when you wave at a car thinking its someone you know and it ends up being some old lady.

Miss the bus, keep running pretending I was going somewhere else.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.