I pretend that I've caught the man in the walk/don't walk sign doing something bad and I stare at him accusingly

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Thinking your life is a movie...

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When reading a book where the main character has the same name as someone I know, I visualize that character in my head as that person.

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Smell a fart and don't react until someone else does.

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Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

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Checking out peoples cars to try and figure out what kind of driver they are.

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Sometimes i think i've been living a dream life, and one day im really gonna wake up in the middle of 9th grade math class and have to explain why i was sleeping on my desk and jerking off so much.

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Lightly touching your stomach or other body parts with your fingers to get that tickling sensation.

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Whenever I Iook into the mirror, I think there's a second evil dimension.

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My dreams are almost always bizarre in some way - the only time they're ever normal is when they're the premonition type, and then they're about completely uneventful things but accurate down to the tiniest detail.

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Search up google on bing or yahoo because i feel that google is so much better

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Play with my own boobs for no reason

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When I make croissants from the Pillsbury can, I'll take one of the little triangles and eat it, because I like the consistency of dough, and i like the fizzy feeling of the yeast on my tongue.

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Remember some homework I have to do... On the day that it's due.

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make food scream if i chop them up.

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make mini paper airoplanes in boring lessons and pretend you are flying them

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I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

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I'm so afraid of using words incorrectly that I look up any word I'm not sure that I'm using properly before typing it into wherever I'll use it. If the definition is too vague, I abandon the word and try something else.

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Sometimes I stay as still as I can and stare at myself in the mirror until it scares me and I freak out about who I am and why I'm living. I have to think of my family and memories to snap out of it.

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I carry more money in my wallet than it appears, I just tuck some away because I think that if I can't see it and have to go through the trouble to get it out- then I won't spend it.

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I have to check my closet for monsters so they don't get me while I sleep

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I sleep in the nude.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.