When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

I violate and then kill people, all ages and kinds... ..:But everyone does that right? I mean... Lol, I just type that because I am insecure now, and I kill when I am insecure... ...Excuse me.

Whenever I'm scared at night in my room I turn on music. Because the music will keep away people trying to get me. Obviously.

When I am bored, usually in class, I simulate what I would do if the zombie apocalypse was occurring right now.

Reading a book and making the facial expressions it describes.

Whenever I'm throwing trash down the garbage chute or into a dumpster, I all of the sudden am terrified that I accidentally threw out a valuable ring/my cell phone with the trash.

When I climb into bed every night, I always say, "Bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed," while shifting until I am comfortablely settled.

Hold your breath when you go in bridge tunnels and compete against your friends to see who can last longer.

Love the natural smell of my dog's paws.

sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

When you get out of the shower and you're too lazy to get dressed, so you just hang around in a towel.

When I'm in a room with other people, no matter who they are, I make myself choose the person I would tolerate the best having sex with just in case of a disaster and we need to procreate.

To my comment below... Rest im peace MJ... Shhh! Mary Jane is resting!

Sometimes when I'm sitting next to someone I start thinking stuff about him/her, making fun of their clothes in my mind or something. Then I have a feeling that maybe that person can read thoughts and immediately start thinking about something else, and avoid eye contact until one of use leaves

I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

Whenever I'm in the shower, I never close my eyes because I think someones gonna kill me

Go to get a drink and by the time you get there you already forgot what you were doing.

I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

clean specks of sh*t in the toilet by peeing on it.

Things I did when I was little: Slowly close the fridge door to see the light go out before it is closed all of the way. Put the light switch in between "OFF" and "ON". Walked in to a room and forgot why, walked out then remembered. (STILL DO!) Drew the sun in the corner of the paper. Put a flashlight in your mouth to see yourself, "blush".

Having the tv on always, just for background noise. Doesn't work with a computer/laptop, must be the tv.

Looking at this naked with a cat on you're lap.

I have seen a UFO

When im blazed i like of all the stupid shit i did that day but always tell myself "its fine, i didnt feel dumb about those things sober"

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.