Rereading a text message 25 times before you send it to make sure it makes sense.

I read your stuff at the interwebs and think "sons, I am disappoint" Moral: Lol, I just might be your father you know... But that does not mean you disappoint me anymore, I kinda expect your worst? Best? I mean... Are you doing your worst on purpose? WOW!

I pee in the water of the toilet to make bubbles

When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

When I'm over at my friends house and they get in a fight with their sibling, I just pet their dog.

Go to bed with my left nostril clogged, wake up with my right nostril clogged.

On Youtube. Moving the mouse cursor over the video thumbnails thinking it will display different snap shots from the video. And realizing what a guy I am...

Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

Watching tv with family/friends and laughing at something on the show, and then feeling awkward because no one else laughed.

My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

think about what im gonna say abillon times in my head before i say it -jesse

I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

Making "X's" with your fingernail on bug bites to get rid of them.

in my mind, traffic cones are called VLC.

Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

Take baths

Not expecting anyone to come over, some one knocks on the front door, mute the TV and hope they just go away.

masturbate quietly in my room.

Had a dream within a dream, just like Inception. You woke up and it felt so real you were sure of it. Then a bit later you wake up again.

I yawn on command… and hate it. –Ikka

Daydream about doing unspeakable things(killing, raping, beating, cutting, shooting, ect.) to the person you hate

strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

Think about what you're going to tell your kids about your childhood when you grow-up.

Sometimes when im lost in thought I twirl a piece of my bangs and stare off in a daze.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.