When im blazed i like of all the stupid shit i did that day but always tell myself "its fine, i didnt feel dumb about those things sober"

I turn on the faucet or turn up the radio in the bathroom so maybe no one can hear me pee.

incognito mode on google chrome

All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

sometimes, i smell my own farts.

Totally piss myself off by thinking of future confrontations that probably won't happen.

Put toilet paper on the seat in my own house.

i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

Wonder if I have a twin across the world and he makes all the opposite decisions.

feel disappointed when i find out that a p0rn scene is just the actor's dream or imagination.

Lie in bed at night, imagining things I want to happen in my life while trying to fall asleep.

I give my own posts a thumbs up whenever I have the option and I know that it's anonymous.

Get annoyed when I'm working on something and someone who's looking at funny pictures wants to show me every single one. Then I do the same thing when I'm looking at funny pictures.

If someone tells me what I did when I was drinking and it's stupid or embarrassing I pretend I don't remember because I was too drunk.

I look at my phone screen when i'm in an uncomfortable situation, and five minutes later i have to look again cause somebody asks what time it is.

Pull the curtain right to the end so there are no gaps just in case some weirdo at night decides to look in my window.

I pretend that my pillow is the love of my life and kiss it and cuddle it before bed.

When you Sitting on the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

When the adverts come on I forget what I'm watching and so spend five minutes trying to remember.

If two cars towing boats were to crash into each other, Would that make it a boating accident?

When i talk i say i like how or i hate that.

I don't know why but I really wish I can ride a bike or drive a car through a shopping mall.

Sometimes I'll say quotes from movies or TV shows out loud to myself.

While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.