Not laughing at funny things on T.V. because nobody is around.

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Taking the little rings off the top of my bottles.

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Mentally preparing yourself to step on a crunchy-looking leaf, only to discover it is in fact soggy, soft and unsatisfactory.

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I set my alarm clock early just so I can get up snooze it.... One, two, three, maybe even four times.

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Act like your on a cooking tv show when your cooking

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I get into a massive fight with my parents, and then do the thing i was told not to just so i can tick them off.

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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Attempting to silently sneak a fart, then it erupts from your anus.

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When taking a shit, I get freaked out in case I get teleported to a place with lots of people by a scientist from the future or something.

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Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

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Whenever i am watching TV my parents always walk by at the worst part like a sex scene or a dirty joke.

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Courtesy flush.

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When no one's at home, the house turns into an action movie set. Going to my room turns into sprinting up the stairs and purposely stumbling to give the effect that bombs are going off. And always make it to the room in time to hop on the last helicopter out of the jungle.

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Sick the top of you fingers in your pants when you are doing something that requires one hand, like watching t.v

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when dialing a number, i hear the number itself when it is dialed

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to wake up from a nice dream than try to sleep again to finish it

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Try to talk to my pet telepathically. - sky

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Click an invisible pen I think is in my hand but is not constantly everyday.

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Every time I go in a bathroom I have to look behind the shower curtain.

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Wheneveri brush my teeth, I make a snarling face.

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I stick one foot out of my blanket so I'm not hot or cold.

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When in a public bathroom, flush the toilet right before your shit falls into the water, so no one will hear.

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If I have a top comment and I see someone else does, I upvote both of ours; friendly competition.

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Try to time the traffic light so that when I snap, my light turns green. Always so so close.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.