sometimes if I am going on a flight to another country I will hold a small pocket of air in my mouth before getting on the plane and then I would let it out after we land

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Try to give my download speed moral support: "You can do it! YES, just stay there!" For anyone out there struggling with slow internet.. I feel your pain

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Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

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Sometimes, I have a hard time looking people I know in the eyes but have no trouble looking strangers in the eyes. I wish I knew why. Help!

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When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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Make a screeching noise with my mouth as I go around corners in my car too fast.

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Waking up @ 4 AM wondering where your pillow went

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I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

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I constantly talk to myself.

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Pick my nose with my elbow, that way I keep my nails clean.

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sing like a pro in da shower

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Pull your headphones away from your ear when you're listening to music to see if it's too loud.

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Accidentally make a weird noise and quickly turn around frantically to see if anyone else hear it.

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Wonder if I have a twin across the world and he makes all the opposite decisions.

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Try and accomplish something before the timer on the microwave beeps :)

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Having gay sex

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outside in the dark see a face in the tree thinks its bigfoot come to get me!

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become increasingly panicked when its dark and you cant find the door handle.

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Coughing really loud to cover up the sound of your fart, then shitting your pants.

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When I eat M&Ms, Skittles or Froot Loops, I always make sure to leave one of every color for the end so I could eat them all at once. #rainbowinmymouth

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Take advantage of loud traffic to fart really hard.

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When I am drinking coffee and I am nearly finished I swish the coffee to get the last of the sugar

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Eat or drink something tpretending it's some sort of fuel that'll give you powers.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.