Smoking in the shower.

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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Skip peeing before bed because you dont feel like it, knowing that in about 15 minutes youre going to have to get back up because you wont be able to fall asleep until you go pee.

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I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.

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my solve media says spare is big but it was space is big

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Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.

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I sometimes have bad dreams that for some reason I don't want to wake up from because I just want to see what happens next

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I have memorized most commercials and recite them when they come on the tv.

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Coughing really loud to cover up the sound of your fart, then shitting your pants.

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When in the shower, try to cross your arms and keep them as high up to your head as you can. Fill them with water and drink from it.

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watch cartoons even though most of my friends don't

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get annoyed by people singing a song only to show off their brilliant voice and automatically think that they cannot sing as good as they think they can

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Get distracted during fap dreams and thinking of your mom and then going OMG GROSS OH GOD IM A PERV!!

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I seriously contemplate what my theme song would be. I imagine it would have no words and a slight Mission Impossible influence.

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I can't get out of bed in the mornings unless the alarm clock reads 0 or 5.

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Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

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I constantly try to turn something I say into my catch phrase.

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After watching a movie, always walk out the theatre feeling like a total bad ass

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Eating a crunchy food while watching tv and turning up the volume little by little until its around 80% because you can't hear over the sound of your own chewing. Then later when you turn back on the tv you scare yourself because it's still at 80% and frantically try to turn it down with super speed before anyone hears you.

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Takes playful flirting way to seriouse.

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Right after moving to a new place I check my room for hidden cameras.

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I imagine myself dying in the worst possible way more than once a day. I don't know...today, I was driving on a bridge and all I could picture was it collapsing and falling onto me, When I'm lying in bed, I imagine my ceiling fan toppling me.

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I think about other women when having sex

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.