When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

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Open a new google tab when someone walks in the room, even if I wasn't looking at anything bad.

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to wake up from a nice dream than try to sleep again to finish it

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Laughing at a joke that you dont think is funny but everybody else does

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while i'm doing something,i think a suitable soundtrack for it.

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When no one's looking, I run up stairs on hands and feet.

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When no one is around I make sound effects for everything I do.

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I hold my boobs if I'm running upstairs and not wearing a bra.

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When you are outside, you see a small shadow moving across the ground. You think it's a ball someone threw, so you look up to catch it, only to realize it is a bird.

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Hate when I can't sleep and the sun starts to come up and I hear birds chirping and i get worried and just realize that I should be happy that it's a new day and to relax.

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I always have to google the name of this website, because I always put the words in the wrong consecution.

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Go to bed with my left nostril clogged, wake up with my right nostril clogged.

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pull the poo out of my butt when im too impatient to push it out

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sometimes, i smell my own farts.

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I sometimes wonder if im the only living person on earth and everyone else is just there in order to affect my existance -Henry

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When something you're sat on makes a noise that sounds like a FART. So you try and do the noise again, to make sure people are aware that the noise was the chair and not you!

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When I aak someone out it takes me 3-6 attempts to get the words out

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hate Justin Bieber

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Sometimes I think the whole world is set up, and I feel like I'm living in some kind of Truman Show. I even sometimes say "I know you're there" to the moon.

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fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

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I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

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When nobodys home, stay as quiet as possible just in case an intrudor is hiding somewhere

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If I read that someone said something a certain way in a book I try to mimic their voice.

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Give a 'thumbs up' or a 'thumbs down' based strictly on how much you like the number it will change it to.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.