Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

I feel like my blanket is an indestructible shield against any monsters that might try to get me at night. If any part of you is out of the covers, you're screwed. lol -ML

after ive done something, or experienced something. when i think back on the days events, i think to myself. "i think ive done that before somewere". i must have a boring existance. its always de ja vu with me.

I'm so afraid of using words incorrectly that I look up any word I'm not sure that I'm using properly before typing it into wherever I'll use it. If the definition is too vague, I abandon the word and try something else.

Sit down in a grass field... immediately start pulling up grass.

Run into a wall and say "I'm sorry" and then realize that it's just a wall.

When I create a situation in my mind where someone is making me mad, then I actually get mad.

Seeing a cartoon character eat something makes me hungry for it even though it may not taste good in real life and I know that.

I don't cut a conversation on the phone short just because I have to use the "facilities". I've mastered the art of being as far away from the toilet while flushing and sprinting out of the bathroom.

I put morals on posts to get a thumbs up. Moral: Posts with morals get thumbs up.

Taking the little rings off the top of my bottles.

turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

When a teacher at school leaves a line of pen on the big whiteboard, my attention can NOT be drawn from it.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

I pretend that my pillow is the love of my life and kiss it and cuddle it before bed.

Try to balance the light switch between on and off.

I don't like being told what I will do or how I will feel.

When I walking the same direction as other people, I secretly race them and do the sports commentry in my head

when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

not eating the ends of a hotdog.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually in a coma and that everything is just a dream and my parents are standing over me watching me and wishing their daughter was awake

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.