Smell your hands to see if there dirty.

Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

Change my name on Siri on iPhone to something hillarius and make it say my name

I like to have a picture of my crush on my computer screen, and will walk around a room while he 'looks at me'.

Wonder what I would have said to my dad if I knew he was going to die

blow nose. look at kleenex.

When you sit down to a great dinner with all your favorite foods and then the nanosecond your ass touches the chair you are instantly he most tired and uninterested in food than you have ever been before

I worry because I keep wondering why I worry.

When I'm getting shouted out i blur my eyes and think of something else :3

Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

say to my friend do you ever think that someone else is thinking the same thing that they are thinking at this moment in time and then SHYT in there mouth. Normally they gurggle it in their throat, before swallowing it and making a pedo face, and sometimes i bike naked and shit on cars with diorrea so it explodes on the windows.

I often think about how I am a thing inside of a body

I lift my butt when I'm farting

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When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

when I have an itch on my hand I scratch it with my stubble

After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

I sit in my sink and pretend that I am water.

Stand on the first floor and look up through the 2nd story railing just to look up women's skirts.

I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

Solving your problems in bed before sleeping and then forgetting all of the solutions when you wake up. This applies to games, homework, and world hunger.

Whenever I am in a dark room at night, and there is a window with blinds with a light shining through, I stand in front of it and pretend I am wearing a striped prison jumpsuit.

Try to think of as many as my female friends as literally possible while masturbating. Rapid Fire envisioning each one I can think of - regardless of their attractiveness - taking my load in one place or another, until I actually cum.

Look at pictures of people who lived a long time ago and wonder how they lived without television and the Internet.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.