When I'm in a public place with a lot of people, I sometimes imagine myself being an epic hero saving everyone there from a monster or some sort of bad guy.

wipe the bottle lid before i drink because i dont whant to taste what the other person had in there mouth...

Every time i take a drink from a cup, i rotate the cup so i never drink from the same place.

Being from another country and always thinking in english.

Unable to be near my cat without petting her or talking to her.

Someone asks you "what's up" and you awkwardly reply "good".

On YouTube, if someone comments a time in the video (or in the description) I always click it for fun, even if it doesn't work. Like if someone comments "it's 4:12 right now" on a 2 minute video I click the link.

Take a dump in the dark... Anyone but me?

I sometimes feel the desire to grab something fragile and - not out of anger, just because it would be funny - hurl it across the room to watch it explode.

When you're chatting with a friend while you're walking around and not really paying attention then you turn around to took at your friend and you realise you've been talking to someone you don't even know the entire time.

When driving and a song come on about death I switch the station because i'm afraid its going to happen to me

How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

Clenching your teeth subconsciously, then wondering why your teeth hurt so much afterwards.

When I'm at the checkout and paying with my card, I try to put my PIN in the card machine before the cashier has a chance to tell me to do it.

When I first start dating or seeing someone I write down options for conversation starters before I phone them in case it goes silent.

I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

Read for hours... then hear a narrative for everything you do after you stop reading. for ex: "Jen gets out of the car, shutting it with a loud bang. She walks towards the house, noticing the dead squirrel in the road."

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

no magazine on toilet? read shampoo bottle

you forget your phone when going to the bathroom, so you search for a shampoo bottle or anything to read or play with in reach.

Sometimes when my mom is aking me something and then i tell her the truth i start smirking automatically as if i'd be lying because i don't know how to make a serious face

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.