Sit down in a grass field... immediately start pulling up grass.

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I play video games with the controller under the covers.

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Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

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I cover the mirror on my bedroom door with a sheet at night, because I think the shadows casted in the mirror are gonna get me.

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think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

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when someone asks you to not listen to they conversation and your listening to music at the same time, in the same room and when they have that conversation, you pretend to listen to your music.

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Make a weird face when taking a picture with a friend, never see the picture, so you try to remake the face you did in a mirror to see how stupid you looked...

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Saying "ow" even though whatever happened did not actually hurt, but you thought that it would.

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when you are pooping you fart and it scares you a little bit.

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no magazine on toilet? read shampoo bottle

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I put morals on posts to get a thumbs up. Moral: Posts with morals get thumbs up.

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Sometimes I wonder if my whole life is a hallucination and I'm actually in some padded room somewhere, talking to myself and staring into space while my real family mourns the fact that their daughter will never be able to live a real life...

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Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

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I talk to my pet when no one is home.

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Saying an awkward word enough times so that it doesn't sound like a real word anymore

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Waking up at 4 am wondering where your pillow went.

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Eat pizza backwards because the crust isn't as good as the cheese part and I want to get that over with.

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Think you looked good the whole day, then come home and realize you were a hot mess and nobody told you

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Before I meet someone I've never met before, I think of stuff to say or do to prevent it from being awkward, but when I finally meet them I do none of the things I thought about doing.

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Thinking you could bump into someone by the corner of a building (or a wall)

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I set my alarm clock early just so I can get up snooze it.... One, two, three, maybe even four times.

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Seeing someone gettin roasted for something and then making sure you dont do the same thing.

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When I walk from one room to the next, I make believe that the room I just left exploded, and that I made it out just in time.

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I cannot f***ing believe how many of these i do... and now i feel out of place

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.