- Things You Think Only You Do

If I'm walking across a road and a car stops to allow me to pass, I say 'Thank you' even though I know full well they cannot hear me.

Check the toilet paper after every wipe.

When no one's at home, the house turns into an action movie set. Going to my room turns into sprinting up the stairs and purposely stumbling to give the effect that bombs are going off. And always make it to the room in time to hop on the last helicopter out of the jungle.

When taking a dump in a public restroom, if someone else walks in, I wait until they leave the restroom before finishing up and leaving the stall, just to make sure they don't see who I am.

When you're bored or alone, you think of an argument you had with a friend recently, then think of all the things you should've said and get all powered up inside, but then you realise it's too late -_-

Think something you shouldn't about someone, stop thinking about it in case they read your mind, and then, as an added precaution, think "I know you listening".

Never tell her who I was talking to on the phone and watch her nosy butt get upset

I never even met you! Why do you care who I'm talking to?

sometimes when i fart i feel like i pooped a little in my underwear but tell myself ''no i didn't'' but feel poopy until i check.

Think you looked good the whole day, then come home and realize you were a hot mess and nobody told you

Aim at shit stains whilst I pee.

Stare at something long enough thinking it will eventually move.

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

Feeling guilty for something you haven't done.

I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.

Know you have enough milk in your cereal when you start to see it peek through the cracks

Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

feel disappointed when i find out that a p0rn scene is just the actor's dream or imagination.

Give vocal commentary on the song I just played when I'm the only one in the car.

Help my dogs eat their dinner....I think the whole time, "If they only had thumbs".....

When someone close to me sadly passes on and later when I am listening to the radio if I hear a song that sounds suitable to that moment I kind of make that our song if that makes sense to any of you

Burp, and then automatically say burp afterwards.

Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

Read posts on this website and realize there are a lot of weirdos in the world.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.