When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

Thinking you smell really bad and then putting to much deodorant/perfume/ect and you still think you smell bad. Is this just me?

When you get in trouble, think of what you could have said or done so you could've gotten away with it.

When listening to music I imagine myself and people in a movie scene that fits the music.

you know that when things have only one like on this site, the people who wrote it liked it

Tear up when I poop

Have to catch my significant other when they lie, not because I really care but to prove I'm smarter

Waking up at 4 am wondering where your pillow went.

Wonder if someone is ever doing the exact same thing you are at the moment.

Two minutes after I text the person I like, I check the message to see what time I sent it and what time the person received it, and estimate that it takes the adverage person about a minute to respond and then another minute for you to receive it. so really, if the person likes you, it would take them about 3 minutes to respond. if its five, you automatically assume they hate you.

Trying not to fart when laughing is challenging.

Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

Before getting in the shower, staring at your naked body, thinking your sexy.

Massive hang-over. Say out loud and promise I will never drink like that again. Next time drink atleast as much as the last time.

I fill my bathtub up with marinara and then sit curled up in it and pretend that I am a meatball.

Love the Twilight books, HATE the movies.

Always think good thoughts before I go to bed so that I have good dreams

i don't have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

Laugh harder when trying to explain what you are laughing about

Put my finger over one pixel of my digital alarm clock, because I know that's the only one that will change in the next minute. Take it off. MAGIC.

If a donkey and a angle fish where to pro create what would be the out come? They can't mate a donkeys a mammal and a angle fish is a fish

When I walk from one room to the next, I make believe that the room I just left exploded, and that I made it out just in time.

When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

pretend you died to see what your dog would do.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.