When I'm walking on the sidewalks, I make a game of how to walk on the pavement squares so I don't step on a line.

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Waking up @ 4 AM wondering where your pillow went

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Yelling my cats name in my mind to see if i can get him to look at me using the power of my mind

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Wonder what random strangers look like or noises and such they make while having sex. Everyone literally. People you interact with at work , customers, your boss, the married couple. Except for people who are like dirty looking af. Our just straight up ugly. Then your like grossed out by those thoughts your having and start getting that home sickfeeling in your stomach. Almost like butterflies but like dead ones or something. Hard to explain.

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draw little triangles while coulouring in to make it seem that theres not so much work -jesse

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When you get lost while driving, the first thing you do is turn down the radio.

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When calling someone you hang up after 3 or 4 rings because you're tired of waiting rather than it being time to leave a message.

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I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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I always poke myself in the eye when I put on mascara, then have a wild hand spasm so it gets all over my face.

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I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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Read the time on your watch, then after a few minutes, read it again because you forgot it.

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i always wipe the ketchup off my face with the bread of my sandwich

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Wanting something so much. Getting it then wondering what to do next

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I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

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Reading your facebook posts that you wrote a year ago or more, and think of how stupid you were at that time.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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On an one night if I come too fast .je persuade the girl that I have to forget my cellular in my automobile and I get out

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Everytime I have ear buds in and I hear myself breathing, I think others can hear it too so I slow my breathing or hold my breath.

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Masturbate while waiting for a game to load.

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Live in a house my whole life and still not know what switch does which

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See the person you like at school, have a quick random sexual thought about them, le random boner appears, and you flip out in your mind

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Pretend my ski pole is a gun while I'm on the chair lift. Or just any object around when I'm not skiing.

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Hatch an escape plan as soon as my date starts to complain about anything.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.