pee in the side of the toilet so its not as loud.

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I Masturbate Daily.

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Wonder if I have a twin across the world and he makes all the opposite decisions.

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If I'm in my room and I need to fart, I walk into someone else's room and fart in there so that my room doesn't stink up.

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while taking a bath, I imagine my knees, belly, arms etc poking out of the water are islands, and i imagine little people running around on them

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masturbate... with condoms and gloves because male genitalia is gross and clean up takes just a few seconds rather than minutes

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Wish you could delete a post if it gets thumbs down

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I plant my feet firmly when the subway approaches in case a random stranger tries to kill me by pushing me in front of the train.

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Get soo scared in the shower when your home alone that you are scared to open the curtain just incase somebody is out tthere

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When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge

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Waste time looking all over for something and notice it is right where it should be.

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I have mixed emotions when I drop a piece of food on the ground, like a chicken nugget, M&M, scoop of ice cream, etc - because part of me thinks it is sad because its only goal in life was to be eaten... but then the other part of me is happy for it, because it is possible that it *didn't* want to be eaten and has just made a successful escape. O_o

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I get creeped out if I haven't looked at a clock in a while and when I finally do it reads 9:11

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When walking along, I try to race someone walking towards me. For example, a letter box is ahead of me and there is someone walking towards me. I will try and reach the letter box before the other person without looking awkward.. then feel like God if I manage to do it.

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Never tell her who I was talking to on the phone and watch her nosy butt get upset

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A bee flies into your classroom and you're too terrified to focus on anything else.

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When at someone else's house, trying to use the bathroom, keep a very close eye on the door just to make sure nobody's gonna walk in on you...

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Get random feelings of nausea and/or dizziness for no apparent reason.

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If two cars towing boats were to crash into each other, Would that make it a boating accident?

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I really enjoy self-pity.

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Read the time on your watch, then after a few minutes, read it again because you forgot it.

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When taking a shit, I get freaked out in case I get teleported to a place with lots of people by a scientist from the future or something.

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when you say something and they go what? so you repeat it and they still didn't hear but once you say "forget it" they suddenly understood you perfectly.

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When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.