I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

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Playing a sad song that talks about your current situation and then looking in the mirror or out the window pretending you are in a sad music video.

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When on long car rides through the mountains of Cali, look at a fence and pretend its a roller coaster and talk like im on it with a friend. And when the fence ends,name and rate it like it was real -Nirp

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Only use the left earphone.

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When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

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Smile like an idiot while reading this site.

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I flush the toilet if the water's green and I'm going to have a poo, so it doesn't splash me.

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If I read that someone said something a certain way in a book I try to mimic their voice.

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When the car ride is silent, I wink with my right eye when I pass a sign on the right, and the opposite for the left. And then when there's a double yellow line, I close my eyes.

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before going to a party, i rehearse the conversations i expect to have with the people who will be there (even though those conversations never actually happent)

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When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

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Whenever we watch a movie or stupid educational film in school, I sleep.

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smoke marijuana

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"Turn the tv volume with my feet" "Take a wood stick and think it's a sword"

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sometime i poop in my hand, then put it in the toilet so it makes less noise and the water doesn't splash up my butt.

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pissing really fast to remove shit stains in the toilet

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When I'm listening to a sad song that relates to my life while I'm walking all alone, I mouth the words and pretend I'm in a music video.

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I used to be the third most useless invention in the world, and now I am so sad, I mean I lost to a square wheel! Moral: On the bright side, ill never be as useless as Rustin Beaver.

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When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

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Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

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You know how there is that sound that gives you the shiver? Whenever you here it you shiver and tell that sound maker to shut up, but then can't stop thinking about that sound and find people looking at you and saying "Is it really that cold?" And then you stop thinking about the sound. P.S. I would like to say I have never relized how weird I am! This site has revealed my inner weirdness! -Astrid

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I sit in a chair upside down and pretend like i'm walking on the ceiling.

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Look at my poo before I flush it.

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Sometimes when walking, accidently fart and then try to squeak my to sound like my shoes squeaked instead of me farting.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.