I always have excellent manners when eating around others, but when I'm alone I eat like a pig and have no manners.

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Doing something, and someone asks you what you're doing, and you realize you can't remember. Then they walk off and the instant they're gone, you remember.

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Reherse jokes/phrases to say to friends in school tomorrow

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sneeze without closing my eyes

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Mares really turn me on, so I download "bad stuff" Ironically though, I worked at a farm last summer and realized there is nothing more disgusting than reality. Still mares turn me on... If on video.

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Has anyone else ever wondered why the women in shows and movies lie with the blanket covering them after apparently having sex with the other person.

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Left alone Big noise, people aren't expected back as soon so grab baseball bat and charge only to find them back early...."what you doing?" "batting my socks around practising my baseball skills"

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Change my music to something cooler than the song im listening to when i pass by other kids my age

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Check the toilet paper after every wipe.

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At the gym, I always try to do 5 pounds more than the previous person.

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Wondering how you look to other people and adjusting your clothes and posture so you don't feel as unatractive as you think you are, but aren't.

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Suck up stuff with the vacuum you know you shouldn't because your too lazy to pick it up.

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Everytime I get new magazines or brochures in the mail I like to open them and smell them. Same with new electronics, I love that new smell.

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It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

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Take nibbles whenever you get to the last piece of your burger to make it last longer.

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Trying to figure out what form of suicide would hurt the least.

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when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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Say "ow" when I drop something or before I get hurt

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Think that some minutes feel shorter than others

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I chew on anything plastic. I don't think there's a pen that I haven't chewed on or a plastic cap I haven't put in my mouth. It's a horrible habit but it feels so DAMN GOOD TO CHEW!

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I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

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I feel like people next to me can read my mind so if I start thinking about something sexual it feels super awkward

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Rapidly click the mouse when your computer is frozen, even though you know it won't do anything to help whatsoever.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.