I have walked into a sliding glass door

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When i am home alone i think there are hidden cameras in my house and wave at objects that might conceal the camers to scare the people looking through them

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Agree with someones ridiculous political opinion just to avoid an argument.

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I stare at people to see if they have a innie or outtie belly button

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Thinking of something but got distracted for a few seconds. After that, I forgot what was I thinking about.

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I can read people's life's and figure out the truth about them with out them telling me how their life is

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On Youtube. Moving the mouse cursor over the video thumbnails thinking it will display different snap shots from the video. And realizing what a guy I am...

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When I hear a sound that I don't know what is, while I'm in an unfamiliar place, I wipe off and then touch as many surfaces as possible. It makes me think that if I'm taken by some scary person, my fingerprints will be easily found. I'm not sure why that would help in many cases, but it makes me feel better.

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When I'm listening to my ipod on a road trip I look out the window longingly and pretend to be in a music video

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Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

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Fap and when you're done you feel ashamed and feel like you're wasting your life lol

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use the restroom at a different floor/building when taking a dump at work.

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Have a fantasy where Jesus Christ is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole with a lawn dart while Garth Brooks gives birth to something resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus's tummy-tum.

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When I am at amusement parks I look and determine which guys I could beat up and which I couldn't.

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Whenever i hear myself in a video or something to me, it sounds way higher pitched than when I hear myself talking Is it just me?

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When posting these, I'm rarely able to read the words/letters in the box that prove you're human and not some computer virus. Now I'm starting to think I'm not a human......

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I chuckle whenever I hear the phase "Stark raving mad." I don't know why.

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I read the down voted posts

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Sometimes I look at a digital clock and try to force the numbers to change with the power of my mind.

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I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

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I'm constantly struck with this odd sensation that I didn't wipe my ass well enough.

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When I get photographed with a flash and afterwards there is that little greenish dot in my vision, I keep trying to look at it directly, although I know that it's impossible

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Picking your dogs booger for him/her

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Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.