Whenever I switch sides on my bed, I feel like when I turn around some scary clown face is going to be RIGHT THERE in my face

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When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

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Try to use my "Brain Power" to pick up things when I am too lazy to get up and get them.

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Sing along to the radio in the car then stop at a red light when you realize other people can see you more easily.

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I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

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Put toilet paper in the toilet before i poop so the water dosent splash

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On Youtube. Moving the mouse cursor over the video thumbnails thinking it will display different snap shots from the video. And realizing what a guy I am...

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Stay up late on the weekdays and go to bed early on the weekends ..... What is wrong with me?

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Whenever I read creepy pastas and there is a picture after the story I get afraid to look at it than when I do I freak out thinking it's going to eat me. Than when I look at it I shout FUUUUUUU.. Than look at it some more and I burst out laughing seeing its a fucking dumb picture.

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Turning on the dryers in the bathroom so no one will hear you peeing

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When on a boring car ride, add up all the numbers on the licence plates I see.

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I never read the Terms of Service. I just click "OK"

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Before posting a comment when you need several consecutive tries to type the words in the box because the lettering is so damn hard to read. But your friend can do it in one try. He got the easy one.

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I constantly try to turn something I say into my catch phrase.

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I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

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i fap in the bathroom because its the only room i have a reason to lock the door in.

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Know you have enough milk in your cereal when you start to see it peek through the cracks

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Imagine flying things and epic battles when listening to music.

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When I fart I immediately go 'Eww. Who farted? That's gross'. And I blame it on someone else, always works :)

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I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

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sometimes when i fart i feel like i pooped a little in my underwear but tell myself ''no i didn't'' but feel poopy until i check.

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Wonder if life is just a dream then get a creepy feeling and immediately think happier thoughts.

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When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

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poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.