I lock the bathroom door even when I'm home alone.

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When in a room by myself and I hear someone coming to walk into the room I'm in, I feel an overwhelming urge to hide behind the door so they don't see me first.

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while i'm doing something,i think a suitable soundtrack for it.

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Skip the first 3 minutes of "Free Bird" because it's too slow.

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Waiting alone inside a public toilet for someone to come in and open the door.... so you don't have to touch the handle!

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In the summer when it's hot, I bring a fan into the bathroom when I take a crap.

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Never eat curry before school otherwise you will have a massive poo

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Everytime i take of my sweater i start singing "its getting hot in here"

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I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

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accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep

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sleep with your legs crossed like your meditating.

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Put my hand under the pillow in bed to get orgasm

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Refreshing captcha codes for five minutes straight until you find reasonably legible letters.

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jack off

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Go on this site to feel normal.

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I apologize, when i bump against things.

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Use a signature that automatically gets me hundreds of red thumbs... Yeah that moral crap...

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Use head & "Shoulders" for pubic hair

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Wash my hands after i use the toilet.

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think about what im gonna say abillon times in my head before i say it -jesse

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pull out a flies wings and let it go

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get so shitfaced you wake up in a closet with piss everywhere

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sometimes when im in the shower and i hear the slightest bump i look behind the curtains to see if anyone is about to scare me

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While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.