Clicking the thumbs up or down when two of the submissions have the same number of thumbs up and think i'm the chosen one.

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say to my friend do you ever think that someone else is thinking the same thing that they are thinking at this moment in time and then SHYT in there mouth. Normally they gurggle it in their throat, before swallowing it and making a pedo face, and sometimes i bike naked and shit on cars with diorrea so it explodes on the windows.

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When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

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I set my alarm clock early just so I can get up snooze it.... One, two, three, maybe even four times.

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Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

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feel disappointed when i find out that a p0rn scene is just the actor's dream or imagination.

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Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

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Sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if I never did certain things like move to a new house or attended a certain school or college. I wonder if I still would have met the people who are in my life now. I think about If I never met my best friends, people who are like family to me. Then I get really sad because it's something I never want to imagine. Afterwards, I talk to them to cheer myself up.

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Thinking, "What is wrong with this generation"

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Masturbate while waiting for a game to load.

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Whenever I think of something creative or weird, I always wonder if someone thought of the same thing.

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Show up for a blind date and say DAMN, WTF! When they open the door.

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When I'm stressed, I pick at the skin on my head and pull white flakes out of my hair. There's nothing more satisfying to me than that.

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Know you have enough milk in your cereal when you start to see it peek through the cracks

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If there's leaves on the ground and the wind picks it up and makes like swirls I put my arms out to make it seem I'm controlling the swirls.

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Thinking about what other poeple are doing right now... Like someone solving world hunger and your sitting there playing games and having fun with friends that are nice and healthy.

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I light my pubes on fire instead of shaving them because they aren't as itchy that way.

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Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

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I stare at people to see if they have a innie or outtie belly button

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(2) When listening to someone I maintain eye contact, but don't actually hear a word they say, just thinking about the eye contact...

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I have to stop the Microwave on 0 but before it beeps or I'm not going to get what I want in life. OCD MUCH

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I really enjoy self-pity.

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Making "X's" with your fingernail on bug bites to get rid of them.

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Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.