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when looking for lost keys i return to the place they should be at least 5 times and look there

while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

when i listen to music in my earphones, i always pretend its me performing the song to an audience.

I bought a ps4 and really regret it.

Rereading a text message 25 times before you send it to make sure it makes sense.

I read your stuff at the interwebs and think "sons, I am disappoint" Moral: Lol, I just might be your father you know... But that does not mean you disappoint me anymore, I kinda expect your worst? Best? I mean... Are you doing your worst on purpose? WOW!

When I'm around people, I sometimes yell in my head "STOP READING MY MIND! I KNOW YOU'RE DOING IT, SO STOP!" just in case.

KICK THE CAN

Try to stop a stopwatch exactly on 1 second with no extra milliseconds

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

I sometimes feel the desire to grab something fragile and - not out of anger, just because it would be funny - hurl it across the room to watch it explode.

when i was a kid, i lookup dirty words in the english dictionary as substitute for porn :(

Play as both sides on fifa

Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

Check the time on my cell phone, put it back in my pocket. Dammit, didn't see the time. Check it again.

sit in the shower

When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

Whenever someone is making a speech, I imagine them being taken out by a sniper mid-speech...

check shower for murder then pee

I constantly talk to myself.

don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

When walking on the sidewalk, try to walk the same number of steps on each square without looking awkward. (now, this is sooo weird, I have no clue if ANYBODY has ever done this more than once)

You pause while walking around your house when you're home alone because you think you heard a noise, but then realize it was just you walking.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.