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when looking for lost keys i return to the place they should be at least 5 times and look there

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while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

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when i listen to music in my earphones, i always pretend its me performing the song to an audience.

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I bought a ps4 and really regret it.

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Rereading a text message 25 times before you send it to make sure it makes sense.

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I read your stuff at the interwebs and think "sons, I am disappoint" Moral: Lol, I just might be your father you know... But that does not mean you disappoint me anymore, I kinda expect your worst? Best? I mean... Are you doing your worst on purpose? WOW!

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When I'm around people, I sometimes yell in my head "STOP READING MY MIND! I KNOW YOU'RE DOING IT, SO STOP!" just in case.

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KICK THE CAN

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Try to stop a stopwatch exactly on 1 second with no extra milliseconds

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I sometimes feel the desire to grab something fragile and - not out of anger, just because it would be funny - hurl it across the room to watch it explode.

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when i was a kid, i lookup dirty words in the english dictionary as substitute for porn :(

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Play as both sides on fifa

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Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

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Check the time on my cell phone, put it back in my pocket. Dammit, didn't see the time. Check it again.

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sit in the shower

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When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

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Whenever someone is making a speech, I imagine them being taken out by a sniper mid-speech...

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check shower for murder then pee

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I constantly talk to myself.

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don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

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When walking on the sidewalk, try to walk the same number of steps on each square without looking awkward. (now, this is sooo weird, I have no clue if ANYBODY has ever done this more than once)

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You pause while walking around your house when you're home alone because you think you heard a noise, but then realize it was just you walking.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.