I pick a green crayon from crayon box but it's one of those yellow-greens that look yellow and now my clover will be half yellow forever.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

If I see a shriveled, dried leaf while walking along the sidewalk I am compelled to step on it and make it crunch.

thumb_up thumb_down +1,627

Run faster down hotel corridors.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

imagine a bunch of girls are watching you at home, so you don't look like a dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Use more toilet paper than you need, just because you feel like it cleans your ass more.

thumb_up thumb_down -79

if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

thumb_up thumb_down -100

Walking down the toy isle in the store, and feeling a little sad that you're not a kid anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

thumb_up thumb_down -9

When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Think the "D" in the Disney logo was actually a "G", and realized that thought process at an age to embarassing to divulge to complete strangers on the internet.

thumb_up thumb_down +846

You try to tell a joke to impress everyone and then you mess it up.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

When I poop I pretend to make my wiener talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +995

OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Sometimes, I skim through the Terms of Service just to make sure I'm not selling my soul or promising my first-born.

thumb_up thumb_down +606

When walking outside by myselff and listening to music, I mouth the words and pretend im the singer of the song in their music video.

thumb_up thumb_down +921

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -83

You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

thumb_up thumb_down -77

Fart after someone else farts sop that no one will know you did too.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Reading a book and making the facial expressions it describes.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

I wonder what a baby is laughing about when they are apparently being entertained by something in the room I can't see

thumb_up thumb_down

Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

thumb_up thumb_down -61

If I'm in my room and I need to fart, I walk into someone else's room and fart in there so that my room doesn't stink up.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

I sometimes wonder if im a baby and my whole life is just a big dream

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Watch the same movies over and over

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.