Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

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When ever i watch a movie with my parents i hope to god there is no nudity or awkward sex talk

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I sometimes try to summon things with the force of my thoughts...I would be so useful...but no way, nothing ever moves.

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If someone uses a term thats like, in the know, and they ask if i know what it means, ill act like, of course ido, even if i dont, and then ill go home and look it up.

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When I was little and I saw disney's hercules I had no idea why Meg was working for Hades

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Pour cereal. Realize there is no milk. You really want cereal so you try it with water. Realize that was a bad idea.

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use my phone as an alarm clock for waking up. but sets the time in PM instead of AM.

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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Fear that the CIA is secretly wathing you.

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See a ridiculously hot girl and wonder to myself "who is the guy who gets to have sex with her. And why does she like him?" As if that can help me bag an equally hotter girl.

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Hum up and down in pitch because it makes LED displays dance around.

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Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

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Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

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Masturbate while waiting for a game to load.

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Close my eyes and squeeze them so I can see colorful stars and galaxies.

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make sure you hit every crack in the sidewalk evenly. slowly over time, you discover that you found an awkward walking pace to match the obsession.

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Sitting on toilet after pooping without wiping for longer than a minute because your in your phone.

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(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

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Sometimes I become paranoid that the ceiling is going to randomly come crashing down and kill me.

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RAPE CHILDREN

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Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

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If there's a mirror i look if there's people around looking at me, and if there aren't it's ok to stare at my reflection.

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Go to someone's house and go and ask where something is and the person you ask just tells you without getting up (I know it doesn't go with the theme of this site but its just something annoying)

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after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.