I never read the Terms of Service. I just click "OK"

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When I watch a movie that terrifies me, I usually find myself sitting on the sofa with a kitchen knife in my hand at the end of the movie.

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Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

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When I'm in a place with two different colored tiles, I only step on the colored ones and pretend the white ones are lava or off-limits.

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Massive hang-over. Say out loud and promise I will never drink like that again. Next time drink atleast as much as the last time.

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Lay in bed , and think what i could of said while i was talking to my crush or what could of happen.

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Reach my hand inside the room to turn the light on before I go in.

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I have tons of imaginary conversations in my head with people I know, but they never happen. It's worse when something funny happens in the imaginary conversation and I laugh to myself, and if someone notices I can't even say that I was remembering something because I wasn't, it had never happened...

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sit in the shower

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Looking around in disgust at your messy room and then doing nothing about it.

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Pee in my work garbage can.

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Think that when you're reading something or watching tv some people somewhere are knowing what your watching or whether or not you understand what you just read so you don't wanna reread it to risk looking stupid.

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Put toilet paper on the seat in my own house.

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Totally piss myself off by thinking of future confrontations that probably won't happen.

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Count the amount of birthday wishes on your facebook page, and compare it to other friends birthdays.

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Close the Facebook page, after not having a single message in hours, and re open it in a minute, expecting numerous new messages......

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Look at a word long enough to not seem like a word anymore, then sounding weird.

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Sometimes I put on my running shoes to make myself feel like I worked out but I really didn't.

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I act as though I've had movie cameras placed in my eyes and a bunch of people will watch my life as a movie at some point. And so I do a narration voice for them.

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If I see a shriveled, dried leaf while walking along the sidewalk I am compelled to step on it and make it crunch.

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When I'm alone I occasionally like to give a little hump to the air. Not for sexual reasons or anything, just because it feels right.

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Looking up 'How to tell if your crush likes you' to get assurance that he/she loves you

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I will look up the definition of a word in a text message before I use it just incase I'm using it in the wrong context.

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when i was a kid, i lookup dirty words in the english dictionary as substitute for porn :(

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.