Apply hand sanitizer after fapping.

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I piss excellence, shit suppority and whip myself with greatness.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When on a sidewalk I always try to make my last step on the block with my left foot.

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Talks to yourself in your head then replies to yourself out loud nikki

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When you get out of the shower and you're too lazy to get dressed, so you just hang around in a towel.

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I only make the tv volume in multiples of 5.

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On Youtube, while reading comments notice that many people reply angrily to the same person. Wonder what they said that pissed so many people off. Try to find them in earlier posts, but fail. Live the rest of the night in depressive state.

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Sometimes I look at people and think, "They poop."

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Whenever I'm in the shower, I never close my eyes because I think someones gonna kill me

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Type in 'things you thought only you did' and find this site. Then smile stupidly and click thumbs up everytime you read something you thought only you did.

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Ask someone "what" when they tell you something even though you heard them clearly

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my solve media says spare is big but it was space is big

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Cough and shift my feet a lot when someone comes into the public bathroom so they know someone is in the stall and won't walk in on me.

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I wet toilet paper before I use it to wipe.

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When talking to someone you sometimes start with the middle of a story through the end, complete with random details that seem totally unrelated to them, and THEN you remember to tell the beginning (which is the part that actually relates to what they were talking about).

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Not doing any work Feel guilty about it Then still do no work

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run up the stairs when its night so that the monsters dont catch you

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lie in bed, stare at the ceiling fan, focus on only one blade, and see how long your eyesight can follow it.

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Questioning why they make the Captcha's(spamblocker) SO hard to read

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pretend you have a fishing pole and are reeling in cars to pass them when your in the passengers seat going down the freeway.

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Pour cereal. Realize there is no milk. You really want cereal so you try it with water. Realize that was a bad idea.

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Seeing an acquaintance who you would feel awkward talking to in a public place, knowing they see you as well, and pretending not to see them, while hoping they pretend not to see you as well.

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When your the only one home and you hear a slight creak be like I HEARD THAT to scare of any serial killers.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.