Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

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make food scream if i chop them up.

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to wake up from a nice dream than try to sleep again to finish it

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Create a little story/scenario in your head abbout someone you like or want to meet, while lying to go to sleep.

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Pretend I'm much more popular than I am with people who don't know my social life.

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I hum the MLP:FIM theme and hope no one recognizes the tune.

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When in a public bathroom and others are in there, pretend to fix your clothes/hair until everyone has left before you use it.

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I refuse to take dump with the shower curtain closed. I know someone's behind it...

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When I see someone with similar hair to mine, I stare at them from behind and try to figure out if that's what I look like from the back.

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Change the channel during commercials when you have the remote, when you don't you go insane and say "TURN IT BACK WE'LL MISS THE START!!!"

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I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

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I get more creeped out the more I read the comments here, especially as the comments start getting really low thumbs ups.

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Try to acomplish getting the rest of your meal reaady before the microwave timer goes off.

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Freak out at sudden noises when home alone at night.

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when my parents are gone i shout random stuff

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Sometimes i think i've been living a dream life, and one day im really gonna wake up in the middle of 9th grade math class and have to explain why i was sleeping on my desk and jerking off so much.

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When I walk from one room to the next, I make believe that the room I just left exploded, and that I made it out just in time.

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Open the microwave at 1 second left to pretend you're on a bomb squad.

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whale sperm

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I vote thumb dlown the ones that i dong like

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Abuse your pet when nobody's looking

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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Lick my cell phone screen to clean it.

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See a ridiculously hot girl and wonder to myself "who is the guy who gets to have sex with her. And why does she like him?" As if that can help me bag an equally hotter girl.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.