Every time you use a vending machine you hope you get lucky and 2 things drop down.

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When I'm in the shower, you think of arguments that can occur, then think of good comebacks to say to your opponent. And when it actually does happen in real life, you don't have the courage to say it.

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When sitting with my laptop on the sofa, and a family member is watching TV in the same room, chuckle occasionally at the screen, just so they know you're not watching porn or something.

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Scared to flush the tolite at friends houses in fear that i will wake someone up of break the tolite.

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I never side with the majority (if given a choice.)

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When I was a little kid and something scared me (i.e. feel like being watched when I walked through the forest in the dark) I began to sing... and then I felt somehow protected. Weird, isn`t it?

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Think about breathing...

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you look at someone and they look toward you and you look away quickly then you look back to see if they are still looking.

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Not wanting to think about something but your brain thinks about it because you are trying not to think about it so much.

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Always coming up with a really great comeback in my head 5 seconds too late. And then playing out what would have happened if I had said it.

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I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

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when singing to music on my ipod, i sometimes pause the music to hear how loud I am singing.

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Try to imagine every couple I see having sex.

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in the morning the first thing I do is pick my nose n eat it n then I smell my discharge

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When you're having a discussion or an argument with someone and you are about to say something important then you completely forget what you were going to say.

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I replace every word of a song with the name of my pet

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My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

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Check an insane amount of times to see if the door is locked, then finally get back to jerking off.

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Open the microwave at 1 second left to pretend you're on a bomb squad.

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Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

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Create a post on this site, and then feel really depressed when I get a ton of thumbs down, even when I give MYSELF a thumbs up.

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Pretending I'm in a phone call when I don't want someone to talk to me.

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Stay up late on the weekdays and go to bed early on the weekends ..... What is wrong with me?

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jack off

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.