I light my pubes on fire instead of shaving them because they aren't as itchy that way.

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Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

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I stare at people to see if they have a innie or outtie belly button

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(2) When listening to someone I maintain eye contact, but don't actually hear a word they say, just thinking about the eye contact...

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I have to stop the Microwave on 0 but before it beeps or I'm not going to get what I want in life. OCD MUCH

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I really enjoy self-pity.

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Making "X's" with your fingernail on bug bites to get rid of them.

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Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

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Dramatically narrate everything I do in my head as I do it.

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Whenever you shave, you make sure you cut both ends of your moustache, leaving a small patch in the middle above your lips. Then you pretend to be Hitler ;)

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When you can't be bothered to go to the toilet so you stay watching tv or going on your laptop while trying to hold it in.

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After learning a new word, I hear it used and written EVERYWHERE for the next week.

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I can't help spitting into the toilet when I piss, let it drop out my mouth and hit the water to see if I can get it in the center.

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i don't have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

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look for old friends on facebook to see what they are up to now

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Any time I hear someone speaking with an accent, I start mimicking that accident. –Ikka

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After using the restroom at someone's house I turn on the water and proceed to check myself in the mirror while the water runs and sounds like I'm washing my hands then I turn off the water and walk out.

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I always twist my washcloth into a cone shape, so when I take my next shower it is dry and hardened. Then I pretend stab it into my stomach and say "MY LIFE FOR AIUR!" before getting it wet again.

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get really freaked out when your in a parking lot and the car next to you starts backing up and you think your moving forward.

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Peeing in the shower

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Always fantasize about grabbing a cop's gun from his holster. Just because I am pretty sure I could.

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I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

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When you're all alone, practice for an interview you're bound to have when you're rich and famous and say other people's responses when they are asked about working with you.

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having cool friends, but all their other friends are nerds.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.