I really like the day I was born even though there is nothing special about it like Dec 25 or May 20 (Christmas or Independence day)

Pee sitting down so I dont have to aim

Thinking your life is a movie...

Lay down in bed and close my eyes and pretend that the bed is slowly levitating towards the ceiling. When I open my eyes, the bed is back on the ground.

Doing something, and someone asks you what you're doing, and you realize you can't remember. Then they walk off and the instant they're gone, you remember.

Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

Make jokes about yourself on the period: "dear god, this is the 5th day I`m bleeding and I`m sill not dead. What kind of monster am I?" ...not funny... :)

As im about to fall asleep sometimes i feel like im falling and then i have a muscle spasem and wake up.

Think about when im old and im dying and under what circumstances,and think will i remember this day when i thought of it and think,shit that was fast,almost like sending myself a message to the future...if that makes any sense lol

HEY! YOU! Yeah you! I can speak you only, NO! Nobody else here! Yeah you only you, by the way you are a dirty piece of s**t you mothe* F**ker! YEAH ITS YOU! I HATE YOU! EVERYBODY HATES YOU YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! *end of special message just for you*

Fall asleep at night fantasizing about how you wish life situations would play out.

Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

Boring car ride? Read every food & drinks rapper you can find .

I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!

Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

My goal is to get as much as possible thumbs down at this post.

when you bleed you suck your own blood

Talk to my cat.

when your professor describes their wife or husband you imagine their wife or husband.

squezzing moisturisure/tooth paste really hard cos the top is all dry and then a shit load comes out all at once

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.