For some reason, I smile whenever I'm telling someone bad news or a sad story. I always try to not smile, but it doesn't work and I feel like a terrible person.

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when the teacher is asking the class something and i have no idea I'm looking at the paper in front of me, pretending to still making notes and thinking to myself 'don't take me, don't take me...'

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I will look up the definition of a word in a text message before I use it just incase I'm using it in the wrong context.

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Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

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"Oh, that was a messed up thought, probably shouldn't think about it again or something worse because---GODDAMN IT."

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I stand under my ceiling fan, looking up while spinning around to make it look still...

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Feeling self conscious about breathing to loudly

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Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

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I used to pretent my legs didn't work and pulled myself up the stairs with just my hands.

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Whenever I leave a phone message, I feel like I'm leaving the last message I will every leave to my family in my life because I will somehow die soon. I've watched too much drama.

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i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

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I like to watch online videos of people and pause the video mid sentence to see the faces they make frozen mid speech

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I sometimes feel someone is watching me and speak towards it in a calming tone, only to again speak to myself telling myself im just being silly... only to turn my head and look behind me just in case.

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Say "what?" when you know what they said, then answer before they can respond. I do it because it takes me a second to figure out what they said and so my immediate response it "what?".

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While driving out in the country area, I am secretly looking for Squatch

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Walking down the toy isle in the store, and feeling a little sad that you're not a kid anymore.

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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I smell or rinse cups before I put water in them. Even if they are clean.

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penis

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Read through all these posts and get all excited when you see things that you thought only you did

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humiliating little girls

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When I wait for something to load, I right click and then quickly try to drag a box around the right click box before it disappears. Then I try to right click and drag and see if I can outline the right click box before it appears.

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Post one on this site thinking everyone will love you but then you realize you're the 2,833 person to post on this site and no one will ever see it. If this is still where it was when I posted it, then congratulations! You've read through 300 FUCKING PAGES! (that meant go get a job)

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Eat something to pass the time while I wait for my food in the microwave to be cooked.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.