Shit in the shower and pushing it down the drain with your feet

thumb_up thumb_down -147

when i use omegle u usually say im a girl, when a guy says how long is his thing, i say 'mine too' :D

thumb_up thumb_down +1

1.Open the fridge...nothing to eat :/ 2.Open the cabinet...nothing to eat :/ 3.Lower expectations..and then repeat :)

thumb_up thumb_down +193

Realizing that when you look behind a shower curtain before using the bathroom and actually see a Serial killer, you have no plan...

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whenever i am watching TV my parents always walk by at the worst part like a sex scene or a dirty joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

When you try to blur eyes and keep them like that when you look around the room.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Pretending you're in a tribute band when you listen to a song.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I always twist my washcloth into a cone shape, so when I take my next shower it is dry and hardened. Then I pretend stab it into my stomach and say "MY LIFE FOR AIUR!" before getting it wet again.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

SOMETIMES I SHIT ON MY HAND.... IN THE SHOWER

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Sometimes I wipe my butt so violently that my finger goes through the toilet paper and into my butt hole. I enjoy it and question my sexuality. ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I pretend that my actions are perceived by a past self and they're always astounded by the change I've gone through.

thumb_up thumb_down +117

Stuff 13 chips in my mouth when no one is looking, bite 1 chip in half and chew it for 30 seconds when someone is looking.

thumb_up thumb_down -76

Fear that the CIA is secretly wathing you.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

When I'm on Facebook, I flip between someone's most recent profile picture and their first one, just to see how much they've changed.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Think that a movie is shorter after you watch it once or twice

thumb_up thumb_down +14

run inside after taking out the trash because a monster might be hiding in the big trash can

thumb_up thumb_down +87

Look at a word and count the letters by 2's - continue counting the letters over and over by 2's until it comes out even at the end of the word.

thumb_up thumb_down -138

While waiting on someone I check my phone and if there is no new message I just read old ones, just to be occupied and don't look stupid or lost

thumb_up thumb_down -87

instinctively thumb down long posts without reading them.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

When I am listening to my ipod in the car or on a bus, i always remove an earphone to check if i am breathing really loudly.

thumb_up thumb_down +141

Think "When are we ever going to use this in our life?" while sitting bored in school.

thumb_up thumb_down +128

Receiving or finding something cool in your dream, then waking up thinking you have it and realize you don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +156

I plant my feet firmly when the subway approaches in case a random stranger tries to kill me by pushing me in front of the train.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

you know how everyone talks about making life decisions in the shower and thinking about life?.....yeah thats me on the toilet

thumb_up thumb_down -131

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.