Post one on this site thinking everyone will love you but then you realize you're the 2,833 person to post on this site and no one will ever see it. If this is still where it was when I posted it, then congratulations! You've read through 300 FUCKING PAGES! (that meant go get a job)

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go on a diet, buy a lot of healthy food, eat it all the same day. 2 weeks later repeat.

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Hang something small in front of the webcam, in case someone is secretly watching me.

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when bored, i imagine my EXACT plan for the zombie apocalypse, down to what would look cool if i was walking down a desolate street ( i am legend style) :D

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Sitting on toilet after pooping without wiping for longer than a minute because your in your phone.

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Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

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On the train, try and mathematically make (add,subtract,multiply,divide etc.) the carriage number to get to ten

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Sometimes I unintentionally mouth the words being spoken on TV.

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put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

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Cough and shift my feet a lot when someone comes into the public bathroom so they know someone is in the stall and won't walk in on me.

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Close all the windows on my computer when parents walk in.

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Put my finger over one pixel of my digital alarm clock, because I know that's the only one that will change in the next minute. Take it off. MAGIC.

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Look into your neighbor's house and halucinate someone watching back

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think that the whole world is a dollhouse and we are being controlled by giant people above who live in a whole differnt world

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(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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Invented a special password for yourself in order to recognize yourself if travel through time.

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If some makes you mad you do things alot better than you would if you were not mad

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I see something glittery, someone tells me not to pick it up because I'll glitter all over myself, I pick it up anyway and glitter all over myself.

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Sunday's are making me feel depressed.

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only drink milk from a freshly opened carton

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use tweezers to pull out leg hair or armpit hair out of sheer boredom.

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When the hero of a movie is drowning I hold my breath to see if I would survive.

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Say what even when u heard someone

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Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.