I don't read the terms of service.

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Burp, and then automatically say burp afterwards.

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touching something (like a crack in a wall) and then thinking to yourself that your the only person thats ever touched it..

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When my soap is running low, I add water to it.

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Make hand gestures when talking on phone

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I plant my feet firmly when the subway approaches in case a random stranger tries to kill me by pushing me in front of the train.

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For some reason, I smile whenever I'm telling someone bad news or a sad story. I always try to not smile, but it doesn't work and I feel like a terrible person.

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Guessing how many people are listening to the same song at the same moment as you

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Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

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Not clicking the Facebook 'like' button on "pee in the side of the toilet so its not as loud", because it will show up on your profile, and you think other people will think you're strange.

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eat chicken, lamb anything with bones with a knife and fork while avoiding using your hands because it makes them dirty

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I brush my teeth while im in the shower

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I have never disliked any video on YouTube with not many views ( no matter how bad it is ) because I feel bad for the uploader.

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Think it's awesome when I look at a clock and it reads the same numbers that my address starts with.

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When I poop I pretend to make my wiener talk.

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Think of something really hilarious to put on the internet, read the rest of a post, and then forget what you were going to write.

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I brush my teeth with the tap on because it sounds weird brushing in silence.

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While making yourself something to eat that takes more than 5 minuets to make. Pretending that you have your own show on a cooking station and talk like your talking to the audience the whole time.

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get embarrassed when someone is in the public bathroom, and your shit makes a splash in the toilet

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Find something you dislike about your face/body and instantly compare it with every person you meet from then on

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Think about blinking, and then realize that when you think about blinking, you can't stop thinking about blinking, and thus a 3-4 minute awkward blinking-fest begins.

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When I'm about to get in bed, I turn my light off and then run and jump into bed so that nothing gets me.

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.don't congratulate someone on facebook until someone other does, because maybe it's a fail.

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When I look at a digital clock, i try to rearrange the number to make them a math equation

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.