Text random people saying I'm pregnant

Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

I find it really hard to not respond a insulting youtube comment with a hopefully even bigger insult.

Watching movies about couples with age gaps and woundering how it would feel like to be with somebody much older (or younger) than you. Would they use viagra or would you not even try to have sex with someone so old and delicate?

When watching the news and see all those children and other innocent people die at wars, in my mind I shout at God and ask him why he doesn't give me the sign and my powers to save the world. J.C.

How many times is it okay to say "what" before just nodding and smiling?

Pull the curtain right to the end so there are no gaps just in case some weirdo at night decides to look in my window.

Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

I never side with the majority (if given a choice.)

When I was a kid and I misbehaved when my dad used to smack me I would put emphasis in my cries to let him think that I got the lesson.

Always fantasize about grabbing a cop's gun from his holster. Just because I am pretty sure I could.

freak out if poster or pictures eyes are looking at me and can't have pictures in my room of famous people, however if I'm out and scared i have to have the pictures on my phone look at me for safety.....really wondering if any one else has this

When I find a new song I like, I listen to it over and over and over; >>Until I run that sh*t into the ground.

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I daydream about what would happen if my phone rang in public and I had a ringtone of a cool song and what people think about the song and if they think I'm cool for it, or if they see some sort of symbolic meaning in the song. I do this while pacing around my room listening to the song. I think about what people I know would think about certain lyrics in the song. I do this all the time.

Imagine that other people can see what im doing, then try to act differently.

Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

When I'm fighting with someone and I've ran out of good points, I just start making random noises.

When laying in bed I put the covers over my head and act like I'm in different places..caves..tent..etc..

Look an ugly person up and down and try to think of ways that they can improve how they look. ( clothing, hair, and makeup)

When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

Eat a biscuit realise how nice it is and eat the whole packet

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.