Archer's Pam poovey, Lana Kane and Malory makes me horny

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Forget a seemingly simple word. Shout it out at random 3 days later...(don't tell me you don't do this)

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While lying in the tub the water gets cold so u turn back on the hot water with ur feet bc u are too lazy to get up and turn it on with your hands

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If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

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Whenever i do something bad to someone I can't stop smiling even though i never wanted to smile in the first place and i feel like people think I'm a terrible person

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Sometimes at night, I find myself imagining people I know saying my name, trying to get my attention in my head. They won't stop until I respond out loud.

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Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

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When at a red you watch the light real close and as soon as it turns green you try to beat the other cars to the other side of intersection

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When I was a little kid and something scared me (i.e. feel like being watched when I walked through the forest in the dark) I began to sing... and then I felt somehow protected. Weird, isn`t it?

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When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

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Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

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I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When I am talking about someone, I check my phone to make sure it hasn't dialed them and to make sure they aren't listening.

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Tried to suck ur own penis

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When looking at these comments, don't like the ones with lots of comments on because you think they have too many and the others deserve your liking as they might feel left out.

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I cover my webcam on my when I fap in fear that someone/something is watching.

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choose which piece of cereal in the cereal bowl i should eat last.

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I know how to type a ¿

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Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

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try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

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Try to think of as many as my female friends as literally possible while masturbating. Rapid Fire envisioning each one I can think of - regardless of their attractiveness - taking my load in one place or another, until I actually cum.

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when looking at a reflection of myself, i try to do it as fast as i can before the reflection does something i didnt

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Get scared of the dark while in bed, so you make sure all limbs are tucked nice and tight under the covers. Once done, you now feel safe..

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.