When you sit down to a great dinner with all your favorite foods and then the nanosecond your ass touches the chair you are instantly he most tired and uninterested in food than you have ever been before

Handing something to a friend or someone and all you can think is "...I've fapped with that hand. And they know I have" even though you clean up after you feel like your jizz is gonna be on what you gave them and theyll find out amd think you're disgusting.

even though you know you turned the light off, you have to go check before you can get to sleep

take 30 pictures and only find 1 where you dont look like shit

Has to cover up with a blanket, regardless of the temperature...

Think I'm going to fall down when I step onto an esculator that's not moving.

Buying a new song, listening to it on repeat for hours until it gets old, and then never listening to it again.

Throw mini celabration of clock says 11:11, 9:11 or anything ending in :00

Think about past screw ups, then cross my eyes thinking to myself "I'm such a F---ing retard."

Use more toilet paper than you need, just because you feel like it cleans your ass more.

feel that the horsehead network captchas can read my mind. kind of scary.

Can't stand it if something rubs against my knees up the way...if it happens i have to rub them down the way with my hands or they feel weird

When approaching a stoplight, I evaluate the vehicles in front of me to determine which ones I think will take off faster so I can get behind them.

get insulted when lazy people cheer you to work hard

Hate Skydoesminecraft.

trying to look cool when you're driving past other cars.

When ever I touch something a certain way I have to touch it again exactly like I did the first time

When Ive just intentionally committed some minor traffic offense (speeding, illegal U-turn) and suddenly worry a cop may have spotted me and act to myself in the car as if I was truly confused and have no idea what I did wrong, like moving my head around and saying, "Huh? Where's that house?"

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

become increasingly panicked when its dark and you cant find the door handle.

I trap my farts under the covers and sniff them all up or cup them in my hand and sniff real hard to get the smell.

Think to myself "If I would have stuck to my diet I would be at my goal weight by now"

Pee extra hard in a urinal when there's someone else in the bathroom so you don't seem weak

Sometimes I pee sitting down and act like i'm a girl.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.