Always coming up with a really great comeback in my head 5 seconds too late. And then playing out what would have happened if I had said it.

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I gotta get down of Friday

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Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

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Counting the lines on the street as they pass the edge of your cars window.

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I make all the faces on my money face the same way.

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Sometimes I put on my running shoes to make myself feel like I worked out but I really didn't.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Saving some leftovers of your favorite food .... the next week its still there (:

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Fart at work when I'm pretty sure no one will come to that area soon.

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Cover up the webcam on my laptop because I think someone might be watching me through it.

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Think you looked good the whole day, then come home and realize you were a hot mess and nobody told you

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Skip peeing before bed because you dont feel like it, knowing that in about 15 minutes youre going to have to get back up because you wont be able to fall asleep until you go pee.

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Having that feeling of entering the wrong classroom or bus, even though you know it is the right one.

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When laying in bed I put the covers over my head and act like I'm in different places..caves..tent..etc..

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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having cool friends, but all their other friends are nerds.

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I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

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If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

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Find different ways to crack your knuckles when you're bored. (I have found 7 ways to crack a finger and I can crackj my hand back

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I wonder if we're actually just dolls and are being controlled by some little girl in her little doll house ....

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Pretending I'm in a phone call when I don't want someone to talk to me.

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I never find things funny unless I'm in a completely silent room, and it is then that I think or see something funny and begin to almost cry of laughter.

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when im lying in bed and fart i bring the blanket up to my nose and smell it. And nod in approval..

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I read your stuff at the interwebs and think "sons, I am disappoint" Moral: Lol, I just might be your father you know... But that does not mean you disappoint me anymore, I kinda expect your worst? Best? I mean... Are you doing your worst on purpose? WOW!

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.