After watching a movie, always walk out the theatre feeling like a total bad ass

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I cover the mirror on my bedroom door with a sheet at night, because I think the shadows casted in the mirror are gonna get me.

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I try to accomplish things while waiting for the timer on the microwave can go off.

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Watching tv with family/friends and laughing at something on the show, and then feeling awkward because no one else laughed.

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I am 23 and I still wish the stalk will take back my younger brother

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when u get something right and do a victory dance and the person to u is just like "da hell?"

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whenever i'm talking about someone, i constantly check my phone to make sure i haven't butt-dialed them and they're listening to everything i'm saying about them!

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Not eat French fries because I don't like the taste rather than because they are unhealthy?

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when on long car rides look out the window imagineing stick figures running

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start planning Halloween costumes on November first.

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Sometimes I look at security cameras and start to act suspiciously like I'm up to something... but really... I'm not.

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Cough and shift my feet a lot when someone comes into the public bathroom so they know someone is in the stall and won't walk in on me.

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I stare at people to see if they have a innie or outtie belly button

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Play with my own boobs for no reason

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Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

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I wear my boxers so I can poop through the pee hole

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I brush my teeth while im in the shower

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I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

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Think of something really hilarious to put on the internet, read the rest of a post, and then forget what you were going to write.

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Get excited when the captcha says something related to whatever you're posting

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Feel the bed gets more comfortable the longer you put off getting into bed.

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fap

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I imagine that there are lines coming out from things and I don't step on the lines (columns, buildings, walls, corners, etc.)

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When you are in a car and a sad song comes on look out the window and pretend you are in a movie.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.