I am 23 and I still wish the stalk will take back my younger brother

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Rapidly click the mouse when your computer is frozen, even though you know it won't do anything to help whatsoever.

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Playing hide-and-seek and finding the best spot ever, only to realize you have to pee

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When i close the refrigiator door, i re-open it and give it a good shove to make sure it tight.

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Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

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Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

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After watching a movie, always walk out the theatre feeling like a total bad ass

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I peel tiny strings off of cheese sticks because it's more fun and tastes better.

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Wiggle my foot befor u go sleep in bed!!??

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When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

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Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

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fap

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I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

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When talking to someone you sometimes start with the middle of a story through the end, complete with random details that seem totally unrelated to them, and THEN you remember to tell the beginning (which is the part that actually relates to what they were talking about).

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Hang something small in front of the webcam, in case someone is secretly watching me.

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(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

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Never write LOL on a text message, because you don't want to sound too extreme

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singing along to a song that you think you know the words to.. but you dont

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Pretend to be texting to look popular in public

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Drink a huge amount of water only for the pleasure of having your stomach filled with it.

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Whenever i am watching TV my parents always walk by at the worst part like a sex scene or a dirty joke.

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I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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Find something on this site that you actually do not do, and think how weird the person who wrote that must be.

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I can't help spitting into the toilet when I piss, let it drop out my mouth and hit the water to see if I can get it in the center.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.