I have memorized my drivers license registration number

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Think of someone you love while trying to fall asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

toilet:a place for reading and going on fb shower:place for singing school:place for sleeping and fuck others.internet:place for shitting brixs.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

When no one is home, I poop with the door open, just because I can.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Solving your problems in bed before sleeping and then forgetting all of the solutions when you wake up. This applies to games, homework, and world hunger.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I can't drink while I'm walking I have to stop.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Open a new google tab when someone walks in the room, even if I wasn't looking at anything bad.

thumb_up thumb_down +822

Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

thumb_up thumb_down -34

When watching a video or listening to music, take earbuds out four or five times in repetition to make sure that no one can hear the audio but you, then check them again when someone comes within twenty feet of you. Then, spend the rest of the time feeling awkward and expecting someone to jump out of the bushes and take a video of that idiot with the defective headphones.

thumb_up thumb_down -61

after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A bee flies into your classroom and you're too terrified to focus on anything else.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Stand really close to the mirror and look myself in the eyes. Try to scare myself or make a really fast movement, hoping my reflection can't keep up.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

When the good guy in a movie is in a bad situation, I imagine myself doing something different that seems more legit.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Remember some homework I have to do... On the day that it's due.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Turning on the TV for background noise when I'm on my computer.

thumb_up thumb_down +316

My hoodie/jacket strings HAVE to be equal in length, or I pull them then restretch the hood out to make them even.

thumb_up thumb_down +463

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

thumb_up thumb_down -41

After eating a banana I leave the last bit that was in the bottom

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

When telemarketers call I speak Afrikaans to them until they hang up

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Keep trying to defend your point even after you've realized you're wrong in an argument

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.