Hate to type Morals under each one of my posts Moral: A small chick in the hand is better than a huge C**K up your ass. I am pretty sure not even women nor homosexuals want birds up there...Then again, I havent searched for anything like that at the intern... they are eating her! And now they are gonna eat me! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD! (fly stuck on head)

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Having leg bounce up and down for no reason at all.

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Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

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Apologizing to things when I drop them and feeling stupid afterwards

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feel legitimately bad for Wile E Coyote whenever he does not get the road runner

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Am I the only one who wrote "free Candy" on the side of my van?

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When I stop thinking about about something it'll turn out that I've been staring at someone without meaning to.

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Whenever I leave a phone message, I feel like I'm leaving the last message I will every leave to my family in my life because I will somehow die soon. I've watched too much drama.

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Aim at shit stains whilst I pee.

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When I was little and I saw disney's hercules I had no idea why Meg was working for Hades

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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Sometimes when my mom is aking me something and then i tell her the truth i start smirking automatically as if i'd be lying because i don't know how to make a serious face

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Blow dry my dick and balls after getting out of the shower.

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I poke myself in the eye with a needle every Thursday.

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Say a word over and over until it sounds weird

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Wish that Mexicans would go fix things in their own country instead of coming here unwelcome and demanding things instead.

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I pee in the shower.

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Whenever I slurp from a straw I do it a little bit at a time, slowly and steadily so people don't turn at me and give me an annoyed face.

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Link gross things with porn i.e: Think of really gross things (or friends or family) when fapping to really hot stuff ( the porn becomes ruined)

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When I'm in the shower and I hear a noise I automatically think someone broke into my house and killed my family and that they're coming for me and I will have to fight off the killer naked.

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Change my name on Siri on iPhone to something hillarius and make it say my name

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I wonder if things are there because I see it and if I was not there to see it would it disappear?

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You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.