In the shower, or just when I'm alone, I imagine having confrontations with people in my life and play out the entire conversation by myself, lip syncing the words with emotions and all.

when you are waiting for something to load, you go "please,please,pleas,please,please,please...." and the when it finally finishes you yell "YES!" OF COURSE, ONLY WHEN YOUR ALONE.

When I read something someone you know has written I read it in their voice.

After brushing my teeth I used to suck the water from it

Spell Checktells me I spelt something wrong even though I am certain it's right.

Sometimes, for no real reason, I'll make strange or funny noises when no one is around.

Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

Turning on the dryers in the bathroom so no one will hear you peeing

Sometime if I need to go I would go outside so I don't splash the seat

Waking up from a really bad dream that you thought was real and then thinking about it all day worried that it actually happened

Sittig on a table donating sperm to my friend gabe

Sometimes I look at security cameras and start to act suspiciously like I'm up to something... but really... I'm not.

I look at this site and wonder if the thumbs up are all from people who actually do the same thing, or just people who like that or think it's a funny thing to do.

Ladies ; wear the thin underwear with the really skinny jeans & pants , & save the thick underwear for the baggy jeans & sweatpants ..

I was the real Stig...

When I'm at the checkout and paying with my card, I try to put my PIN in the card machine before the cashier has a chance to tell me to do it.

Put my hand under the pillow in bed to get orgasm

Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

Locking your pet in the room and forcing it to spend time with you.

shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

Brake for tail-gaters

I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

Try and accomplish something before the timer on the microwave beeps :)

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.