find a nice photograph of food from the web and post it on fb just to watch my retard friends make a big deal out of it.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

When you sit down to a great dinner with all your favorite foods and then the nanosecond your ass touches the chair you are instantly he most tired and uninterested in food than you have ever been before

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Change my name on Siri on iPhone to something hillarius and make it say my name

thumb_up thumb_down -25

When I'm in the shower and I hear a noise I automatically think someone broke into my house and killed my family and that they're coming for me and I will have to fight off the killer naked.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

I have to check my closet for monsters so they don't get me while I sleep

thumb_up thumb_down +20

You keep going through pages of "Things You Think Only You Do" clicking the button until you realize that your on like page 50.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Every once in a while I think 'I know you're reading my mind...' and look about the classroom. See if anyone looks at me.

thumb_up thumb_down -65

When at a friend's or another person's house, I pee while standing up. But at home, I always sit down when i pee.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

put my headphones in but don't listen to any music so people don't bother me.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

Not wanting to think about something but your brain thinks about it because you are trying not to think about it so much.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Looking at these in school when it's dead silent and trying so hard not to laugh so you won't get yelled at.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Seperate your food on you dinner plate

thumb_up thumb_down -49

When watching a video or listening to music, take earbuds out four or five times in repetition to make sure that no one can hear the audio but you, then check them again when someone comes within twenty feet of you. Then, spend the rest of the time feeling awkward and expecting someone to jump out of the bushes and take a video of that idiot with the defective headphones.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

I very carefully smell what I'm about to eat before I eat it, but I'd most likely eat it, even if I hadn't smelled it first.

thumb_up thumb_down +82

Saying "ouch!" when someone throws something and it hits an inanimate object.. -Sarah

thumb_up thumb_down -4

when u start laughing then start clapping and look like a seal

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Liking the smell of your fart and Poo and denying it to people.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Whenever I look in the bathroom mirror, I fear that I will see a terrible bloody monster standing behind me. I convince myself of this so completely that I panic and rush out right after I pee.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Not doing any work Feel guilty about it Then still do no work

thumb_up thumb_down -108

When I stop thinking about about something it'll turn out that I've been staring at someone without meaning to.

thumb_up thumb_down -75

hallo

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I stick one foot out of my blanket so I'm not hot or cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -135

masturbate... with condoms and gloves because male genitalia is gross and clean up takes just a few seconds rather than minutes

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Sometimes I make awkward eye contact with strangers. And I quickly look away. And then I look back. And then look away again. And I keep being compelled to stare awkwardly at the random stranger for no reason.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.