When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

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Having to step on snails to hear the crunch

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Aim at shit stains whilst I pee.

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Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

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Can't stop tears from comeing to your eyes when singing

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Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

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Whenever I'm in the shower, I never close my eyes because I think someones gonna kill me

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Before drinking the actual soft drink, I drink the fizz as fast as I can.

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Count the amount of birthday wishes on your facebook page, and compare it to other friends birthdays.

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Act like your on a cooking tv show when your cooking

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I deeply pick my nose with tweezers. It's like the relief of pooping to me.

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When walking down a long hallway with someone else at the end, becoming self conscious that your eyes are watering up

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Post on this website, then give yourself the first thumbs up to kick-start your success.

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Pee while setting down even if your a dude.

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Get really annoyed when something interrupts your yawn... then try and force yourself to complete the yawn

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Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

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even though you know you turned the light off, you have to go check before you can get to sleep

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Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

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I sometimes feel like I am the only one like me in this world

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http://www.todayswhatsappstatus.com/

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When i'm in a classroom I think about all of the possible ways to save everyone if something bad happens.

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Feel the bed gets more comfortable the longer you put off getting into bed.

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I like to have a picture of my crush on my computer screen, and will walk around a room while he 'looks at me'.

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say to my friend do you ever think that someone else is thinking the same thing that they are thinking at this moment in time and then SHYT in there mouth. Normally they gurggle it in their throat, before swallowing it and making a pedo face, and sometimes i bike naked and shit on cars with diorrea so it explodes on the windows.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.