Take everything out of the fridge, and climb in it, and pretend your in a time capsule.

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I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

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Run up the stairs like a gorilla because it's easier that way.

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I never read the terms and conditions but I say I have

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A lot of times I'll make up reasons for why different things happen even though I really have absolutely no idea.

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Go up stairs two steps at a time. Avoid those stairs forever if there are an odd number and I have to end in a single step.

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When I'm walking and I step on a crack with my left food, the next time I step on a crack it has to be my right foot and vise versa. I can't step on a crack twice in a row with the same foot. But I don't have to step on every crack.

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Food is always tastier the SECOND time you heat it up.

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when I take a big dump I turn around to see how big it is

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Pick my scabs off and then lick the blood off.

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I scrape the scum off my teeth with my fingernail and then I eat it.

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Turn on Fox News and wonder if I'm watching a bad comedy routine or news reporting.

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Lick my cell phone screen to clean it.

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Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

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I eat something and read book/newspaper/magazine at the same time. Then i take food crumbs off the book and eat them too.

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misread dig bick

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Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

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Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

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When you have a stuffy nose, and you put tissue in one nostril so you can breathe.

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when someone goes underwater in a movie I like to hold my breath and see if I would have survived in that situation, I almost died during Finding Nemo

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I always feel chinese accents are unintelligent.

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when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

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when u start laughing then start clapping and look like a seal

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when i wake up from a dream and it was an amazing dream. then i try to fall back asleep to have it again...it doesn't work

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.