When I let water out the bath I swish the water so it makes a little whirlpool

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Never tell her who I was talking to on the phone and watch her nosy butt get upset

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I sometimes deliberately missed buses and trains even if I could easily board them.

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When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

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Sleep with pillow between legs

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Believing in the kindness of strangers

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Know you have enough milk in your cereal when you start to see it peek through the cracks

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I eat something and read book/newspaper/magazine at the same time. Then i take food crumbs off the book and eat them too.

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Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

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Open blinds when taking a poop to look outside, then realize that someone could be watching you.

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I open the shower curtain when I get in the bathroom to make sure no ones there.

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Waiting alone inside a public toilet for someone to come in and open the door.... so you don't have to touch the handle!

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okay,So we bought a 1000 piece puzzle and made a point to put it together when it was done we found that it was missing a piece so we went back to the same store bought the same puzzle and went through it until we found the missing piece then returned it.

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Whenever I'm doing my makeup I pretend I'm doing a makeup tutorial on Youtube.

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browse the internet at school and look at shit brix and the dog with the jesus butthole appears and the teacher saw and said what are you looking at? i was banned for the rest of the term. jesse footter

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imagine killing someone by accident and feeling really guilty about it.

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use tweezers to pull out leg hair or armpit hair out of sheer boredom.

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Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

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when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

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Sometimes I worry that my life is just someones dream and that I'm not real.

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Whenever we watch a movie or stupid educational film in school, I sleep.

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Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

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Help my dogs eat their dinner....I think the whole time, "If they only had thumbs".....

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.