Playing with your phone or remote throwinng it up and down until it hits your face

thumb_up thumb_down +202

Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Look at my poop before flushing

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Sex scene comes on TV while you are watching with your parents... Try to act normal... Fail.

thumb_up thumb_down +163

Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

thumb_up thumb_down -33

When in bed, I fold a small section of the covers in my hand to make a point and poke my fingers with it.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

When I walk into the bathroom and the lid of toilet is closed, I always get slightly nervous to lift it up and see into the toilet. I'm always thinking there'll be something disgusting or scary in there.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Someone asks you "what's up" and you awkwardly reply "good".

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Whenever I am in a conversation with someone, be it a family member, close friend, or stranger, I nearly always imagine either starting a random brawl with them for no reason (i.e. punching them in the face) or making out with them or something, neither of which I would ever consider doing. Am I alone?

thumb_up thumb_down +176

I am sure that no one else has the same mental slowness as me and my brother. When I say mauve he says maeve and we continue like this for hours. It is certainly an exciting way of eating up those motorway miles:)

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Change the channel during commercials when you have the remote, when you don't you go insane and say "TURN IT BACK WE'LL MISS THE START!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down +596

I dip my pizza crust in soda

thumb_up thumb_down +129

Give a 'thumbs up' or a 'thumbs down' based strictly on how much you like the number it will change it to.

thumb_up thumb_down +269

After learning a new word, I hear it used and written EVERYWHERE for the next week.

thumb_up thumb_down +2,155

When I'm opening my locker lock, I try to beat the person next to me.

thumb_up thumb_down +305

Wonder what random strangers look like or noises and such they make while having sex. Everyone literally. People you interact with at work , customers, your boss, the married couple. Except for people who are like dirty looking af. Our just straight up ugly. Then your like grossed out by those thoughts your having and start getting that home sickfeeling in your stomach. Almost like butterflies but like dead ones or something. Hard to explain.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

When I'm walking I pretend that I'm staying in the same place and moving the world beneath me.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Moving my bottom jaw around slightly makes me feel like I have dog-like ears and I'm moving them around.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Yell at game shows when the people are stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -8

when looking for lost keys i return to the place they should be at least 5 times and look there

thumb_up thumb_down +235

I eat spoons of dry hot chocolate powder when nobody is around.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.