Laugh harder when trying to explain what you are laughing about

When I was younger, I would always try to construct some type of car by using the plastic things from Push-Ups as wheels.

Sometimes I find myself staring at the television only to realize its off.

Even if it's something as innocent as a simple google search, I'm still inexplicably terrified when my parents draw near and could potentially see it. I silently flip out and frantically hide it like it's porn or something. ..And I don't even look at porn :I

when u start laughing then start clapping and look like a seal

accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep

Reach my hand inside the room to turn the light on before I go in.

Check this site often to see if anyone liked my comment or not...

Feeling sorry for objects to throw away!! Haha anyone els?

Think about awesome stuff that you could do (e.g beating up someone who steals your gf's purse or something) when listening to music

Think something you shouldn't about someone, stop thinking about it in case they read your mind, and then, as an added precaution, think "I know you listening".

When ever I'm walking up or down stairs, i always have to step on the last step with my left foot.

Invented a special password for yourself in order to recognize yourself if travel through time.

I used to be the third most useless invention in the world, and now I am so sad, I mean I lost to a square wheel! Moral: On the bright side, ill never be as useless as Rustin Beaver.

taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

Sit down in a grass field... immediately start pulling up grass.

I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

get really confused

When i feel the back of my right hand starting to itch. in a few days, i get some money. When the back of my left hand itches.Some money goes.

I'm so afraid of using words incorrectly that I look up any word I'm not sure that I'm using properly before typing it into wherever I'll use it. If the definition is too vague, I abandon the word and try something else.

When I hear the doorbell ringing and I'm not expecting anyone, I turn off the tv/music and try not to make any sound, so they think there's no one home.

i always think people can hear my thoughts.

I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.