Make a screeching noise with my mouth as I go around corners in my car too fast.

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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Think about having sex with the dog. You wouldn't, but what if you did?

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Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

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A lot of times I'll make up reasons for why different things happen even though I really have absolutely no idea.

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Try to make a sound described in a book or text (like a gasp or a gargle)

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Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

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Try to use my "Brain Power" to pick up things when I am too lazy to get up and get them.

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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I hate people who shows-off their SLR Cameras. I mean, so you're a human now because of that?

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sometimes when im in the shower and i hear the slightest bump i look behind the curtains to see if anyone is about to scare me

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When I see interactive ads on webpages ( "Shoot 5 iPhones And Get One Free!" type of windows ), I feel compelled to finish the task, even though I KNOW it's going to open a pop-up and waste 10 seconds of my life.

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When taking a shower, and standing in the opposite direction where the water is coming fromY

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Use my phone to see what time it is

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When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

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You pause while walking around your house when you're home alone because you think you heard a noise, but then realize it was just you walking.

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Wondering how you look to other people and adjusting your clothes and posture so you don't feel as unatractive as you think you are, but aren't.

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When on long car rides, I always look out the window and imagine a little man running alongside the car.

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Can't seem to manage not throwing rocks into sea/river

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Write my own music without literally writing it on something even though I'm only grade 3

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get home from work and masturbate instantly

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I don't read the terms of service.

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Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

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Fart when i'm alone RIGHT before someone walks in... try to talk over the smell...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.