Try to acomplish getting the rest of your meal reaady before the microwave timer goes off.

Think it's awesome when I look at a clock and it reads the same numbers that my address starts with.

Moral: Damn I clicked on pointless super powers how did I get here! Moral: I wrote the "thing only I do" below :P

Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

Sitting next to a banana called James

sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

Reading a book and making the facial expressions it describes.

Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

when im lying in bed and fart i bring the blanket up to my nose and smell it. And nod in approval..

When I'm in the shower, you think of arguments that can occur, then think of good comebacks to say to your opponent. And when it actually does happen in real life, you don't have the courage to say it.

Get scared of the dark while in bed, so you make sure all limbs are tucked nice and tight under the covers. Once done, you now feel safe..

Fap and when you're done you feel ashamed and feel like you're wasting your life lol

Contract my gluteus maximus while sitting for a long time to feel more comfortable.

Read what other people do that you don't, and think how weird that person must be.

I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

I take receipts out of the ATM's disposal slot in order to see how much money people that I've never met have in their accounts.

Awkward moment... Pretend to send a text.

close the fridge door really slowly just so you can see the light turn off

When posting these, I'm rarely able to read the words/letters in the box that prove you're human and not some computer virus. Now I'm starting to think I'm not a human......

Scratch my ass/armpit and HAVE to smell it.

Pulling the same faces as the character you are reading currently is.

Sometimes I think ''Someone somewhere in the world just got slapped'' or ''Someone just took a nasty shit''.

wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.