When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

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I lift my butt when I'm farting

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I suck my shirt without realizing im doing it until people tell me.

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Put ear buds in nose, open mouth, instant speaker. If you don't do it try it.

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Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

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I used to be the third most useless invention in the world, and now I am so sad, I mean I lost to a square wheel! Moral: On the bright side, ill never be as useless as Rustin Beaver.

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I meow when my cat meows.

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Doing something private and think "What if my mom/dad/boss etc. saw me now?"

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mindlessly touch my laptop or desktop PC's screen after having just used a tablet.

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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Sometimes when walking, accidently fart and then try to squeak my to sound like my shoes squeaked instead of me farting.

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I make a mental note NOT to buy the product or service if I feel they are trying to brainwash me with their ads.

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coughing when your having a poo so people know that your on the loo

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Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

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Picking my nose.

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go to the bathroom, turn on the hot water, get undressed so that the water has time to heat up

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When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...

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Sometime if I need to go I would go outside so I don't splash the seat

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Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

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Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

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forget i left the light on somewhere in the house and when i see it on i think a ghost did it..

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while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.