When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

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Randomly flexing random muscles after long time of sitting at the computer

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worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

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Pretend to talk on the phone when you see someone you don't want to say hello.

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I pretend that I've caught the man in the walk/don't walk sign doing something bad and I stare at him accusingly

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Suck up stuff with the vacuum you know you shouldn't because your too lazy to pick it up.

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When you buy a car you then see that make/model everywhere.

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do a fake cough when my shit is falling in the toilet

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Eat a biscuit realise how nice it is and eat the whole packet

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Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

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close left eye, then right eye to see how things move....

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Attempting to start phychic conversations with people in public

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Playing TV in bed because if I don't I jump at every noise in the house and don't sleep.

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

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Imagine that other people can see what im doing, then try to act differently.

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Whenever people dare accuse me of being too full off myself I tell them. Moral: I cant get to full of myself, the more me, the less you, ALL THE BETTER FOR EVERYONE! WE ARE VICTORY! (except you)

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I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

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When I have a bottle in my hand and nothing to do in class. I read the nutrition facts and ingredients 2 to 4 times until the teacher says something.

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There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

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pinch your nostrils in between your finger and thumb and rub them back and forth in order to smell the inside of your nose.

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Turning on the dryers in the bathroom so no one will hear you peeing

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play on your game for ten minutes before you realise why you stoppedd the last time

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When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.