I sometimes want to eat spaghetti with my hands, but for whatever reason have never done it...

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setting your alarm early so that when you wake up you see you still have time to sleep and you're like YES!!!

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When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

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Walk out of movie thinking that I would be like them some day.

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Hum up and down in pitch because it makes LED displays dance around.

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Thinking you could be in a "Truman Show" style scenario and scanning areas of your house and possessions for tiny little cameras and microphones.

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Sometimes I think that I'm a character in The Sims 3 and someone is controlling everything I do.

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When you get lost while driving, the first thing you do is turn down the radio.

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Run up all stairs two at a time, and memorize all the staircases with odd number of steps. On those, I start with one step so I can end on a two.

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Whenever I'm holding two round objects, I try to juggle them.

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I tell inanimate objects what to do.

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when making thing only you think you do you never read the terms of service

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I replace every word of a song with the name of my pet

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When reading something you have different voices for the characters/people.

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Whenever I send or receive texts, I always make it a point to have more received texts than sent ones. It makes me feel popular.

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When you're in your late teens, you blare the car stereo when driving near girls that are walking. When you grow up, you turn the radio down in fear that you look like a tool bag.

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Hatch an escape plan as soon as my date starts to complain about anything.

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when i was i kid i use to do the balloon trick where you rubit on your head then when there is enough put it on a wooden floor and while it's followin me i put my hands out and pretended that i was controlling it

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I want to suck on your penis

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You pretend to fight imaginary people while no ones looking:/ But you look like the star wars kid...

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Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

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push a fart out really slow so you think nobody will hear it

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In elementary school whenever it was supposed to be mental math I never did it mentally.

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Smell your hands to see if there dirty.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.