Convince yourself that all of your friends are partying together without you when they dont respond to your text messages.

always hurt urself and blame the object for hurting u

Point your finger to the sky When your favorite comes on in the club or on the radio

when I have an itch on my hand I scratch it with my stubble

Am i the only one who noticed that the title of this page has a grammatical error?

Think of something really hilarious to put on the internet, read the rest of a post, and then forget what you were going to write.

Listen to the same songs for years on end without ever knowing the lyrics because they've been the soundtracks for your daydreams.

I only used to eat McCoys Salt & Vinegar crisps when it was raining, because I thought they tasted better when it rains. Anyone else?

Realizes there is less toilet paper than first thought. Hobbles across bathroom to find more. Failure. Take shower.

Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

Think about all of the germs that are on restroom doors and water taps.

imagine shooting lasers out from the car and bouncing them of walls and back to the car

Read what other people do that you don't, and think how weird that person must be.

when i was i kid i use to do the balloon trick where you rubit on your head then when there is enough put it on a wooden floor and while it's followin me i put my hands out and pretended that i was controlling it

When you fart in class but try to cover it up by moving around so other people think it was just the chair squeaking.

Domina Olga shows no mercy when she ride your dick

When I am surfing the web and i go to another website i see an ad that was about something i just viewed from previous website I wonder if a little man is inside my pc keeping catalog of every website that i visit.

When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

Cuss my ass off in the morning - jd

I kick my shoes off, sending them flying to various parts of the room. I then pick them up and place them neatly beside each other

Stop at traffic lights thinking it will close soon, when actually remains only 5s to close second and u run like crazy.

Take everything out of the fridge, and climb in it, and pretend your in a time capsule.

Take nibbles whenever you get to the last piece of your burger to make it last longer.

Sometimes I look at people and think, "They poop."

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.