whenever i'm talking about someone, i constantly check my phone to make sure i haven't butt-dialed them and they're listening to everything i'm saying about them!

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Turn the fan and/or sink on in the bathroom to drown out the noise from masturbating.

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Take baths

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I have had a dream where my teeth fall out.

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hate Justin Bieber

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Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'horse-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

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Try to balance on and off on the light switch.

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Try to fly by jumping and then discover you can't

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coughing when your having a poo so people know that your on the loo

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I replace every word of a song with the name of my pet

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When I step on something pokey, I don't say the quick "OW" that is expected, I go the extra syllable and a say "JOW!"

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try to find this website, but type in "thingsonlyyouthinkyoudo" or "thingsyouonlythinkyoudo" .. give up.. then google it instead.

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I make a conversation with myself when looking at mirrors !

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I have seen a UFO

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When I have an argument with someone and they're correcting my grammar over a word that I obviously made up but they're grammar/slash spelling skills suck I want to end them.

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Use head & "Shoulders" for pubic hair

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"????????? ???? ?????! ??? ?? ???????? UH1 HUEY!!! ??? ?? ???????? ??????? ??????????? ?????, ????????? ?? ??????? ? ??????????????? ???????!!! ?????? ????, ???????????????? ?? ???????, ?? ?????? ??????? ?? ????! ???? ???????????? ???????, ????? ??????? ???? ??? ?????????, ? ??????????? ?????, ??? ????????? ??????? ??????????? ?????!!! ? ??? ?? ????? ???? ??????? ??????????? ??????????. ???????? ????????,???? ????, ??? ??????? ?????? ??? ????? ??? ????? ???? ? ??????. "

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pretend celebrities are watching you then getting really freaked out.

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arrange certain social situations with attractive girls just to make spank bank deposits.

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When I woke up this morning I was asleep.

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Develop a really weird sleeping pattern in the summer, for example going to bed a 5 A.M. and waking in the early afternoon.

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When walking into a smelly bathroom, hold your breath so you don't have to breathe in the poo air.

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Wondering how you look to other people and adjusting your clothes and posture so you don't feel as unatractive as you think you are, but aren't.

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When you say something you think is funny but it turns out that it's only funny in your head so once you say it there's this moment of awkwardness and everyone else probably just forgets about it but it haunts you for the rest of your life. ~

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.