When I'm waiting for someone who is late. I go-over in my head how I'm going to greet them. For example "Well, it's about damn time", or "Finally!".

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I like to food shop between midnight and 5 am

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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Will use delayed foot-to-ass insults on verbal bullies. You know, the kind that goes off in the persons head days or weeks after they thought they won an argument with me.

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Being all alone in your house and your mind starts to believe its haunted.

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Putting your bra on your dogs dead

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When I see that someone else is typing while I'm texting them, I try to quickly finish what I'm typing and send it so that I won't have to change my response.

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Domina Olga shows no mercy when she ride your dick

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Not get any thumb ups on a post. Turns out there really are some things only I do...

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I sometimes want to eat spaghetti with my hands, but for whatever reason have never done it...

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when dialing a number, i hear the number itself when it is dialed

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coughing when your having a poo so people know that your on the loo

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Fap and when you're done you feel ashamed and feel like you're wasting your life lol

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Take nibbles whenever you get to the last piece of your burger to make it last longer.

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Feel all cool and look suspiciously at everybody else while leaving the theater after a good dramatic movie.

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whenever i'm talking about someone, i constantly check my phone to make sure i haven't butt-dialed them and they're listening to everything i'm saying about them!

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Clench your butt super hard to slowly let out a fart thinking no one will know.

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wonder y nobody facebook likes or comments on these

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pretend celebrities are watching you then getting really freaked out.

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Think about all of the germs that are on restroom doors and water taps.

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masturbate quietly in my room.

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dont wash hands for the recommended 30 seconds

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I'm so used to pooping with my phone that everytime I forget it I take less than 5 minutes, versus the usual 26.

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When you fart in class but try to cover it up by moving around so other people think it was just the chair squeaking.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.