arrange certain social situations with attractive girls just to make spank bank deposits.

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when walking i always count how many steps i have taken as i go

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When I woke up this morning I was asleep.

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Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

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when walking up to an automatic door, you sweep your hand towards to the door when it opens, you feel like the Force is with you.

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Put toilet paper on the seat in my own house.

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Sometimes I like to count the amount of steps it takes to get upstairs/downstairs. Then I realize that the number is never the same.

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Wondering how you look to other people and adjusting your clothes and posture so you don't feel as unatractive as you think you are, but aren't.

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Feel like you're the only one pressured into giving gum away by your friends.

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Sometimes I stop typing in the middle of a sen

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Go to the kitchen to eat, forget what I'm doing, go back to whatever I was doing, and realizing that I'm hungry.

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Food is always tastier the SECOND time you heat it up.

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Feel all cool and look suspiciously at everybody else while leaving the theater after a good dramatic movie.

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Sometimes I look at people and think, "They poop."

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Giving my dog a massage.

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Create scenarios when you are standing around/ waiting for someone in public (ie. pretending you are sending a text to someone), in fear of what people may think if they see you standing around doing nothing.

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I want to suck on your penis

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Being all alone in your house and your mind starts to believe its haunted.

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Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

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Develop a really weird sleeping pattern in the summer, for example going to bed a 5 A.M. and waking in the early afternoon.

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when someone asks you to not listen to they conversation and your listening to music at the same time, in the same room and when they have that conversation, you pretend to listen to your music.

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Try to fly by jumping and then discover you can't

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftcodes.info <

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When I am walking at night, I see a slight shadow behind me for a second, I walk faster, I see the shadow again, I think it is some kind of scary monster and then I decide to run for my life. When I get back home, I realize the shadow is my shadow.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.