the time where you sit behind a person that smells like BO badly!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -53

sometime i poop in my hand, then put it in the toilet so it makes less noise and the water doesn't splash up my butt.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

I am sure that no one else has the same mental slowness as me and my brother. When I say mauve he says maeve and we continue like this for hours. It is certainly an exciting way of eating up those motorway miles:)

thumb_up thumb_down -59

When I woke up this morning I was asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -73

Doing a little dance after having sex because your so proud you're a FATHER!!! - Uncle Jerrett

thumb_up thumb_down -81

Read what other people do that you don't, and think how weird that person must be.

thumb_up thumb_down -91

ur parents never pay attention to u but when they do they r yelling at u

thumb_up thumb_down -111

Putting your bra on your dogs dead

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I look really handsome in my mirror, only to find myself looking weird in other mirrors, and like a total retard at photographies.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Pretend to be texting to look popular in public

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I sometimes watch entire movies with the sound off and a good album playing.

thumb_up thumb_down

I split my gum in half so I can chew on both sides.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Imagine the perfect video game and wonder why nobody made it yet.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

feed a gecko worms every day, not the good worms though...

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

thumb_up thumb_down -26

going to bed at 10:30 pm realize i have to check Facebook go to YouTube randomly watch 2 hours of nothing, then find my self pulling an all nighter cause its 4 am and i got school.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Ladies ; wear the thin underwear with the really skinny jeans & pants , & save the thick underwear for the baggy jeans & sweatpants ..

thumb_up thumb_down -52

When I post something on this site, I always do the thumb up at my own post.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

pretend celebrities are watching you then getting really freaked out.

thumb_up thumb_down -74

laziness .... its all in the mind

thumb_up thumb_down -82

i see almost everything as a sign

thumb_up thumb_down -84

When I make croissants from the Pillsbury can, I'll take one of the little triangles and eat it, because I like the consistency of dough, and i like the fizzy feeling of the yeast on my tongue.

thumb_up thumb_down -98

I'm so used to pooping with my phone that everytime I forget it I take less than 5 minutes, versus the usual 26.

thumb_up thumb_down -116

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.