When I woke up this morning I was asleep.

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I want to suck on your penis

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Everytime I look at the clock it see so say 4 20 9 11 or 11 11

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when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.

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When I'm sleeping, I turn and my bed shakes, and I wake up thinking it's an earthquake.

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For some reason I really love to be hated on horsehead network, no idea why, stopped questioning it moments ago... Moral: Know what I mean?

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when you wave at a car thinking its someone you know and it ends up being some old lady.

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when im alone and in a bad mood i make stupid faces with my eyes closed and try and figure out how stupid i looked. then i start laughing hysterically because i think that im an idiot. then i repeat this process until i have to pee from laughing so hard because im already in the bathroom so why not utilize the toilet, rather than waiting for a commercial and speed-peeing because im scared that i missed some of the show i was watching :D -Grace-

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Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

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I wonder if a blind person knows how colors look?

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I worry because I keep wondering why I worry.

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Vote up your own websites posts, to make them look more popular!

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When I was younger I used to challenge myself with touching the roof I would first jump and see if I could touch it then I would try and see how long I can touch it and now every once in a while I just touch it and think of how far I have come.

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Lying in be and pretending you are in a tv show, the characters best friend, playing it out in your mind. Or you dream while awake, and you control it, and you fly to Hollywood and become your faborite celebrities best friend.

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only feel the need to click one of the related sites that draws you after youve clicked 'next page'

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When I'm in the shower I act like I'm filming a music video.

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Whenever I see a girl, I always do the math for how good they would be for banging

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Here's a fun game I play if I wake up in the middle of the night: I look over at the alarm clock and see what numbers are displayed. Then I shut my eyes tightly and wait a few seconds before opening them again. If I open my eyes and see that the numbers on the alarm clock have changed, I win. If I open my eyes and they didn't, I lose.

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When watching the news and see all those children and other innocent people die at wars, in my mind I shout at God and ask him why he doesn't give me the sign and my powers to save the world. J.C.

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when looking at a reflection of myself, i try to do it as fast as i can before the reflection does something i didnt

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sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

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Read what other people do that you don't, and think how weird that person must be.

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When you think thoughts, you think them in complete sentences as if you were saying them and in your accent.

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Pretend to be texting to look popular in public

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.