Whenever I'm in the shower, I never close my eyes because I think someones gonna kill me

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laziness .... its all in the mind

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I want to suck on your penis

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Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

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Start thinking about how your walking, and then worry that you may lose control of your legs and fall.

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when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

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Wondering how you look to other people and adjusting your clothes and posture so you don't feel as unatractive as you think you are, but aren't.

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Try to fly by jumping and then discover you can't

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You come across a movie on network television, you own it, you can see the DVD on the shelf, it would take you less then 30 seconds to put the DVD on, instead you watch it on that station, commercials and all.

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I feel that getting a 98 on a test is better than getting a 99.

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I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

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Thinking you smell really bad and then putting to much deodorant/perfume/ect and you still think you smell bad. Is this just me?

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misread dig bick

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When ever my boyfriend doesn't reply to a text for a few hours I always imagine a worse case scenario and end up crying hystaricaly.

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being super bored at shool

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i see almost everything as a sign

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When boarding the escalator, I select a specific step before getting on causing a slight queue.

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when i piss in the toilet, i flush half way through and race the toilet to the finish.

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Admit, that most of your saved files on you´re computer have titles like: sdfdshleh / sjjs87 / sjflekeh

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When doing your hair or makeup you pretend your doing a tutourial when nones around

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There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

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When you accidentally like get something on your hand so you go to wash it off but feel compelled to wash your other hand too even if it's not dirty

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Shutting the fridge door slowly just to see the light shut off.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.