I split my gum in half so I can chew on both sides.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

When I'm alone I occasionally like to give a little hump to the air. Not for sexual reasons or anything, just because it feels right.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I cannot f***ing believe how many of these i do... and now i feel out of place

thumb_up thumb_down -21

interview yourself over some amazing accomplishment you achieved like becoming the youngest emmy winner and pretending you're really humble.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

While in the "try on" rooms of a clothing store, check myself out in the massive, wall mirror that's in there... and/or get nervous that someone is watching me.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Take everything out of the fridge, and climb in it, and pretend your in a time capsule.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

I have memorized most commercials and recite them when they come on the tv.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

I see some one I have a crush on in the hallway and I walk towards them and brush my arm against them and be like OMG I TOUCHED HER!

thumb_up thumb_down -37

When riding in a car I pump my arms to pretend I'm running at an incredible rate.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Fap and when you're done you feel ashamed and feel like you're wasting your life lol

thumb_up thumb_down -41

When someone is reading something I have to read it at sonic speed in my head before they get to the end and if i dont do it in time I get angry.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

When on long car rides through the mountains of Cali, look at a fence and pretend its a roller coaster and talk like im on it with a friend. And when the fence ends,name and rate it like it was real -Nirp

thumb_up thumb_down -41

When I do something stupid and people are around I hope that nobody saw me and I never tell anyone what I did. But if i do something stupid and I am alone I feel I have to tell somebody.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Coughing really loud to cover up the sound of your fart, then shitting your pants.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

When you're having a discussion or an argument with someone and you are about to say something important then you completely forget what you were going to say.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Showering with my uncle Jarrett <3

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Thinking you could bump into someone by the corner of a building (or a wall)

thumb_up thumb_down -53

in silences, freak, thinking someone can read your mind and tell them off in your head

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Think of something really hilarious to put on the internet, read the rest of a post, and then forget what you were going to write.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

i see almost everything as a sign

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Think about all of the germs that are on restroom doors and water taps.

thumb_up thumb_down -71

When I need to poop in a public toilet, I poop to the side so there's no plop.

thumb_up thumb_down -83

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.