when you dont know what someone said so you just awkwardly start laughing and it turns out not to be funny.

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When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

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When taking a dump in a public restroom, if someone else walks in, I wait until they leave the restroom before finishing up and leaving the stall, just to make sure they don't see who I am.

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I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

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I cannot f***ing believe how many of these i do... and now i feel out of place

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when watching a movie or tv show, i think i am the main character and when it does somthing stupid i become embaressed

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when my mum buys way too much of something I imagine were one of those 'doomsday preppers' families, with mounds of supplies in our basement.

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Take everything out of the fridge, and climb in it, and pretend your in a time capsule.

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I see some one I have a crush on in the hallway and I walk towards them and brush my arm against them and be like OMG I TOUCHED HER!

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Think about the things you could do with you had the power to stop the time.

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Take nibbles whenever you get to the last piece of your burger to make it last longer.

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Watch the same movies over and over

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repeat what you just said 2 seconds ago in a group conversation thinking no one heard you

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Set Fire to the Rain

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in silences, freak, thinking someone can read your mind and tell them off in your head

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When you're the youngest child, you never quit feeling like a little kids, even in your 20s.

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Buy tons of movies and only watch them once. Rarely buy books and reread them a million times.

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When something weird happens I nod in agreement.

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Waste time looking all over for something and notice it is right where it should be.

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imagine shooting lasers out from the car and bouncing them of walls and back to the car

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Will use delayed foot-to-ass insults on verbal bullies. You know, the kind that goes off in the persons head days or weeks after they thought they won an argument with me.

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I'm so used to pooping with my phone that everytime I forget it I take less than 5 minutes, versus the usual 26.

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Wonder if I have a twin across the world and he makes all the opposite decisions.

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get really confused

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.