Realizes there is less toilet paper than first thought. Hobbles across bathroom to find more. Failure. Take shower.

In a meeting at work, you imagine throwing coffee into your boss's face, just to see what he would do.

Wonder if I have a twin across the world and he makes all the opposite decisions.

When I'm in a public place with a lot of people, I sometimes imagine myself being an epic hero saving everyone there from a monster or some sort of bad guy.

when i'm at the computer i say out of loud what i'm typing

Refreshing captcha codes for five minutes straight until you find reasonably legible letters.

Sometimes I stop typing in the middle of a sen

stare at someones face until they distort and then wonder why they are asking me why I'm smiling.

When on a sidewalk I always try to make my last step on the block with my left foot.

When climbing onto an escalator, I cannot just step on it and go, I have to mentally prepare myself and time my steps to get on, especially if it's going down, cause I'm terrified I will fall off... I usually end up irritating the people behind me trying to get on, as it takes me almost 10 to 15 seconds to find the right step.. And also, I cannot touch the escalator's sides.

Make the water from your shower shoot from your finger and pretend to be a water-bender.

when you kill a bug you act like a god and yell something before you kill it

I fantasize about my idol as I try to fall sleep at night. He's Michael Jackson.

Stop at traffic lights thinking it will close soon, when actually remains only 5s to close second and u run like crazy.

Naming every pet you've ever owned Peter Jankins

I have memorized most commercials and recite them when they come on the tv.

I refuse to forward chain letters

I always paranoidly think that someone else might see what I see through my eyes he can't hear what I hear and he can't smell what I smell he can only see and if I close my eyes he falls asleep automatically I try to avoid thinking this but that's impossible

Here's a fun game I play if I wake up in the middle of the night: I look over at the alarm clock and see what numbers are displayed. Then I shut my eyes tightly and wait a few seconds before opening them again. If I open my eyes and see that the numbers on the alarm clock have changed, I win. If I open my eyes and they didn't, I lose.

being super bored at shool

I eat ass

When you're the youngest child, you never quit feeling like a little kids, even in your 20s.

I always get paranoid when I go to take a shit because I leave the computer on and somebody comes in the room where the computer is.

I think source beggars are lazy pest that should be groin kicked

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.