when you kill a bug you act like a god and yell something before you kill it

I kick my shoes off, sending them flying to various parts of the room. I then pick them up and place them neatly beside each other

Convince yourself that all of your friends are partying together without you when they dont respond to your text messages.

always hurt urself and blame the object for hurting u

I refuse to forward chain letters

Stop at traffic lights thinking it will close soon, when actually remains only 5s to close second and u run like crazy.

I have memorized most commercials and recite them when they come on the tv.

Here's a fun game I play if I wake up in the middle of the night: I look over at the alarm clock and see what numbers are displayed. Then I shut my eyes tightly and wait a few seconds before opening them again. If I open my eyes and see that the numbers on the alarm clock have changed, I win. If I open my eyes and they didn't, I lose.

Look to the right, and see nothing. Look to the left, and see nothing. Look to the right again, and see the chick from the ring (or some scary shit) standing there.

I think of unbelievably perverted things seconds before I am about to cum when masturbating.

I can't trill my R's

I rub the ends of my hair because it feels awesome.

I eat ass

Shutting the fridge door slowly just to see the light shut off.

When I'm bored in school I always imagine the teacher asks me something and my response is starting to sing a song. Somewhen some of my friends sing along with me. Then the whole class sings this song. We run out of classroom into the hallways and every other pupil comes out their classroom to see what's happening. Then They all sing along with me. We run out of school and sing and dance like in a musical. Then I actually remind myself, its impossible that every student knows the lyrics of the song I'm just thinking of and get depressed again.

when walking i always count how many steps i have taken as i go

When you fart in class but try to cover it up by moving around so other people think it was just the chair squeaking.

Check behind the shower curtain for a killer.

Talk to my cat.

I sometimes feel someone is watching me and speak towards it in a calming tone, only to again speak to myself telling myself im just being silly... only to turn my head and look behind me just in case.

I sit in my sink and pretend that I am water.

When light goes off and cant see digital clock numbers when you are trying to sleep/wake up, i scream and get terrified because i think i got blind

When on a long car ride, i tend to look out the window and imagine that i am running on the side of the car and doing flips and other types of parkour to keep up with my car...

When taking a dump in a public restroom, if someone else walks in, I wait until they leave the restroom before finishing up and leaving the stall, just to make sure they don't see who I am.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.