I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

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Sitting on a table at school and looking at the things u only think i do website

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Try to see nipples through body paint.

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When I'm riding in the car, I'll spot a tree, make it my goal and try to beat the car on the opposite side of the road to it. (Seriously I don't think anyone else does this!)

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Wonder if anyone doesn't actually talk to themselves for some reason or another at some point in their life. (If so, how can talking to yourself be the first sign of madness? So many people do it...)

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Look to the right, and see nothing. Look to the left, and see nothing. Look to the right again, and see the chick from the ring (or some scary shit) standing there.

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i feel relived after i prick and see that hard-white thinggy that oozes outside my annoying acne.

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When you accidentally like get something on your hand so you go to wash it off but feel compelled to wash your other hand too even if it's not dirty

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Coughing really loud to cover up the sound of your fart, then shitting your pants.

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I rub the ends of my hair because it feels awesome.

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Thinking you could bump into someone by the corner of a building (or a wall)

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When I'm in the shower, I talk to myself, usually about my plans for video game procedures.

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being super bored at shool

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Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

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in silences, freak, thinking someone can read your mind and tell them off in your head

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When something weird happens I nod in agreement.

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Call the ninja turtles by their full names.

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Trying to preform oral on yourself.... And failing.

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Talk to my cat.

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I split my gum in half so I can chew on both sides.

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I sit in my sink and pretend that I am water.

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When on a sidewalk I always try to make my last step on the block with my left foot.

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Avoid as many television commercials as I can

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When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.