when my mum buys way too much of something I imagine were one of those 'doomsday preppers' families, with mounds of supplies in our basement.

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I hate other people's mirrors, they make me look different

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While waiting for my food ot cook, I'll wash the dirty dishes that I used so that I don't need to wash lots of dishes after I eat.

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Not buying a product you might have otherwise been interested in simply because you think their TV ad is stupid.

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When I'm in the shower, I'm afraid something might try to kill me so I shower with my glasses on.

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Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'whores-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

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When I'm bored in school I always imagine the teacher asks me something and my response is starting to sing a song. Somewhen some of my friends sing along with me. Then the whole class sings this song. We run out of classroom into the hallways and every other pupil comes out their classroom to see what's happening. Then They all sing along with me. We run out of school and sing and dance like in a musical. Then I actually remind myself, its impossible that every student knows the lyrics of the song I'm just thinking of and get depressed again.

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When someones talking to a group of people that I'm in and says something bad that I do but think nobody else does, I stand perfectly still and don't blink and breath as quietly as possible until the next subject arrives.

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Mix up "I'm starving," "I'm freezing," and "I have to pee," in my head, and then say them out loud the wrong way, in times of extreme starving/freezing/needing-to-pee desperation.

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Waste time looking all over for something and notice it is right where it should be.

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Will use delayed foot-to-ass insults on verbal bullies. You know, the kind that goes off in the persons head days or weeks after they thought they won an argument with me.

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when you mouth words (but saying them out loud) when someone can't hear you

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Trying to recreate all facial expressions of people on television, even animated ones!

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Assume that on another planet or galaxy there are people just like humans that look exactly like me. Like an alternate universe.

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Check behind the shower curtain for a killer.

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Start thinking about how your walking, and then worry that you may lose control of your legs and fall.

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Wonder if I have a twin across the world and he makes all the opposite decisions.

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turn the colour down on your tv and pretend what you are watching is an old movie

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You come across a movie on network television, you own it, you can see the DVD on the shelf, it would take you less then 30 seconds to put the DVD on, instead you watch it on that station, commercials and all.

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When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

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Sometimes I'll say quotes from movies or TV shows out loud to myself.

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When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

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Constantly look at all clocks when the minute hand/digit reads '11'

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The ability to go one hour back in time by concentrating really hard for two hours.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.