I fantasize about my idol as I try to fall sleep at night. He's Michael Jackson.

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Think about what to say to the person you like and never actually say it .

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Sometimes I think ''Someone somewhere in the world just got slapped'' or ''Someone just took a nasty shit''.

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I think of unbelievably perverted things seconds before I am about to cum when masturbating.

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Sittig on a table donating sperm to my friend gabe

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When I was little and I saw disney's hercules I had no idea why Meg was working for Hades

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Write "my opinion thinking-aloud-sentences" on the "circle the answer" test as footnotes when I'm not sure about the answer.

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When you can feel yourself blushing so you pretend to be preoccupied with something else.

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Showering with my uncle Jarrett <3

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Thinking you could bump into someone by the corner of a building (or a wall)

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Buy tons of movies and only watch them once. Rarely buy books and reread them a million times.

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When I get the chance, I always nick a chip from my mum's or dad's dinner.

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Play Minecraft

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Whenever there is a volume button on something i have to make sure its on a number 5 ie: 0,5,10,15

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When I need to poop in a public toilet, I poop to the side so there's no plop.

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im going to kill that person and get away with it

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Learn how to say "I love you" in a different language, just to say it to the person you like and observe their dumbfounded expressions.

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Pretend to cough in class so other people could pretend to cough

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Talk to my cat.

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Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

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I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

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I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

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Writing/ Typing "wemon" to represent more than 1 women, but then realizing that it's not actually a word...

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If two cars towing boats were to crash into each other, Would that make it a boating accident?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.