Judge a stranger in your mind (God, they're ugly/fat etc.) then wonder if they heard you thinking it.

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When walking on stairs, always counting how many of them there are.

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Whenever there is a volume button on something i have to make sure its on a number 5 ie: 0,5,10,15

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Trying to preform oral on yourself.... And failing.

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Assume that on another planet or galaxy there are people just like humans that look exactly like me. Like an alternate universe.

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Go to someone's house and go and ask where something is and the person you ask just tells you without getting up (I know it doesn't go with the theme of this site but its just something annoying)

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sometimes i wonder how it would be to think in another language and i try but cant

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I fill my bathtub up with marinara and then sit curled up in it and pretend that I am a meatball.

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wonder if the strange thing you're doing right now will pop up on this website

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sometimes when i fart i feel like i pooped a little in my underwear but tell myself ''no i didn't'' but feel poopy until i check.

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Sometimes I'll say quotes from movies or TV shows out loud to myself.

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I have to put the radio volume in multiples of three and my daughter has to put it in multiples of five so when we are together it either has to be on 15 or 30.

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Check the toilet paper after every wipe.

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when you kill a bug you act like a god and yell something before you kill it

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When I'm running a bath I sometimes sit and look at myself in the mirror and act out conversations with people I've never talked to or celebrities, and when I say something that sounds good I'll repeat it over and over again until I nail huge emotions on my face.

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Think about what to say to the person you like and never actually say it .

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Remember some homework I have to do... On the day that it's due.

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Sometimes I think ''Someone somewhere in the world just got slapped'' or ''Someone just took a nasty shit''.

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Look to the right, and see nothing. Look to the left, and see nothing. Look to the right again, and see the chick from the ring (or some scary shit) standing there.

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Use é instead of e to spell Pokémon

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Whenever I see a girl, I always do the math for how good they would be for banging

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Whenever I send or receive texts, I always make it a point to have more received texts than sent ones. It makes me feel popular.

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Shutting the fridge door slowly just to see the light shut off.

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Not wanting to think about something but your brain thinks about it because you are trying not to think about it so much.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.