Think about my life as a book when I'm in public, for example "I then walked over to my friend to say hello to him."

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Skip lines to read faster then get confused by everything for the next 10 pages.

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I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

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When I'm in the shower, you think of arguments that can occur, then think of good comebacks to say to your opponent. And when it actually does happen in real life, you don't have the courage to say it.

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Have arguments with yourself about what to wear, where you put that other shoe, whether to get out of bed, etc. Just get up! No, you do it! You're the one who set the alarm! Ughhhhh I hate you!!

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When I'm around people, I sometimes yell in my head "STOP READING MY MIND! I KNOW YOU'RE DOING IT, SO STOP!" just in case.

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I love the We'll Be Right Back jingle on the Eric Andre show.

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I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

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Why are the rich so friggin unhappy?

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CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

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I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Look at every individual line on my hands and see if they are identicle

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Brake for tail-gaters

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Start to pray at night, but get bored and stop in 2 min.

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look at bins as i walk past them

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I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

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Use an entirely different vocabulary in your head than everyday life.

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When the wind is blowing like crazy, I pretend I am the god who controls it.

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Hope that one day your closet will have a secret world like Narnia...

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I never feel bored

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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When in the shower dread putting the shower gel on you chest as it is freezing!!!

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See a sexy girl, wanna go up and talk to her....cant think of anything cool to say and afraid of denial. Just me?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.