Drop something down the side of the couch, say that you'll get it in a minute and then forget about it

I always write b as d or d as b since I've learned the alphabet, and i hate my keyboarb cuz its on lower case every time.

I speak dialogues at home to myself that I could possibly have with people in hypothetical situations. Km

Look at a guy and think that he is a good looking guy, than immidiatly try to think of something else because thats gay.

I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

I wonder if old women enjoy sex?

When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

pick nose in car and realize people can see you when stopped at a red light

I don't read the terms of service.

Sometimes I lie in bed and wonder what the house would look like upside down.

When I'm watching a video on YouTube, I repeatedly click on the video slider section below the video because I feel uncomfortable not doing it, ever since I realized that you can't move to different parts of the video with your keyboard without clicking there first.

I always feel chinese accents are unintelligent.

Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <<

try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

trip over nothing. break into spontaneous dancing.

Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

Wipe a soda can after somebody else in my family drinks out of it just in case I get sick or I may feel there spit.

Before getting in the shower, staring at your naked body, thinking your sexy.

I gotta get down of Friday

When I'm watching something or playing something and the character goes underwater, I hold my breath until the character reaches the surface. This is weird as hell, does anyone else do this?

Doing a little dance after having sex because your so proud you're a FATHER!!! - Uncle Jerrett

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.