Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.

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If I'm alone, I'll imagine myself as somebody else an start acting as if I'm in a different life, complete with different people and places because in my imagination, I get to control what is going to happen next. Because, my imagination is way better than my reality.

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After reading some good posts here, I skipped to the last pages just to find out really sick people and stupid things.

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See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

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I think Lois Griffin on Family Guy is hot!

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Rubbing the corners of your lips on the side of your hand and smelling it.

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Moisturize "down there" after a really drying wipe session.

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Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

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I tilt my head back and eat grapes pretending like im a greek god

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When bored you watch the minute hand on a clock and try to see if you can see it move

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My parents are annoying.

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Skip lines to read faster then get confused by everything for the next 10 pages.

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Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

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Pick your dead skin then eat it.

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Being the only one laughing at something on TV, then feeling awkward.

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I worry because I keep wondering why I worry.

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Hope that one day your closet will have a secret world like Narnia...

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Look into your neighbor's house and halucinate someone watching back

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Look at my poop before flushing

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When I'm alone with my pet, sometimes we just sit down and stare at each each other for a minute or two

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Almost every time someone tells me something sad I have to fight the urge to grin.

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I never find things funny unless I'm in a completely silent room, and it is then that I think or see something funny and begin to almost cry of laughter.

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check shower for murder then pee

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Tally mark everytime I take a shit.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.