Hope that one day your closet will have a secret world like Narnia...

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When I drive I cut corners even at low speeds so that the people behind me think I am experienced race car driver.

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RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

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Forget a seemingly simple word. Shout it out at random 3 days later...(don't tell me you don't do this)

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I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

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Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

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When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

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i get an headache when i each cheese. but i don't get one when i have pizza or cheese and onion crisps

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trip over nothing. break into spontaneous dancing.

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Brake for tail-gaters

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pretend your on the phone talking to someone to make you look like you not a loner

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My parents are annoying.

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when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

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I play out romantic scenarios with myself when I'm alone. We're talking full-blown just straight up talking out loud- to myself, of course. It's not that I'm lonely or anything since I did this when I had a boyfriend anyway (just to clarify, it didn't end because of this XD.) I really just feel like doing it because it's really friggin' entertaining. If you've never done it, well... it's basically like being in a really crappy, low budget soap opera, with a plot that doesn't make any damn sense, staring you as every character and the audience. That's basically the only way I could describe it lol.

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When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

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When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

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I sometimes look at a guy and wonder how big their dick is.

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After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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Read something strange and funny that you don't actually do, then say: "whaat?" And lough and everyone around you just look at you not knowing why you're talking to yourself an laughing.

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My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

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Whenever I hear someone say a word in a way that I like, I repeat it.

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Having gay sex

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Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.