Almost every time someone tells me something sad I have to fight the urge to grin.

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on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

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check shower for murder then pee

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humiliating little girls

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Stare off into space in the middle of a conversation

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Look at my poo before I flush it.

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I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

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Pee while setting down even if your a dude.

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Still record on VHS tapes.

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Sometimes if I am by myself at the house or in the car I will act completely insane and absurd. This usually involves me screaming incoherent babble, whole body twitching, making absurd faces and doing this thing where I bite my tongue and shake my head violently. If any normal person saw me they would either think I am having a seizure or currently possessed by Satan.

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Whenever I go to the toilet on an airplane I worry that during the time I'm there the plane will drop out the sky.

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If I'm alone, I'll imagine myself as somebody else an start acting as if I'm in a different life, complete with different people and places because in my imagination, I get to control what is going to happen next. Because, my imagination is way better than my reality.

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After brushing my teeth I used to suck the water from it

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as soon as i put some mint gum in my mouth, i sneeze countless times.

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Rubbing the corners of your lips on the side of your hand and smelling it.

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when you wave at a car thinking its someone you know and it ends up being some old lady.

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I tilt my head back and eat grapes pretending like im a greek god

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put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

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I have the background on my computer a picture of some cartoon characters,and when I'm alone I talk to the screen like those characters are actually in the room. -Briarwoodninja

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I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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thinking your pants are wet when you only just sat down for a long time

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Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

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I pee in the shower. :3

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Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.