when a sex scene comes on the tv i try make up an excuse to go somewhere like i need a drink or a pee.

I pee in the shower. :3

I wear my boxers so I can poop through the pee hole

I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

When I take a shower, I screw with my iPod for a half an hour "Waiting for the water to warm up".

i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

when you're texting in class and you realize you are staring at your crotch and smiling.

when you are on EXCEL file on your computer, you scroll down so far, that it goes to 1000

The volume level on my TV has to be either an even number or a multiple of five.

Play as both sides on fifa

Sit at your desk at work and think to yourself "is this it? I feel like I was meant for something bigger, like being an actor or a real life hero." then you look around you and feel bad because you feel like you dumped on everyone else who seem happy wih their lives. Then you go back to your boring desk job anyway.

I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.

I always feel like i have to eat something while watching a movie that I've seen so many times.

I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

When I used to go on car rides at night I would look up at the moon and I would think it was following us.

Every time I walk up the stairs in my own house, I feel compelled to do it on all fours.

Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.

I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

Leave coins on the floor in the corner when I have a party to see if there is a petty thief around

Scroll aimlessly through the posts on this website and for some reason, creepily stop and check the comments on the one that has the word "boobs" in it.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.