I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

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When in a room by myself and I hear someone coming to walk into the room I'm in, I feel an overwhelming urge to hide behind the door so they don't see me first.

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When in shower, I turn the heat to max for a few minutes to warm up the whole bathroom.

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I don't leave the toilet in a public restroom until the other person leaves, so I don't have to make awkward eye contact.

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I pee in the shower. :3

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Read posts on this website and realize there are a lot of weirdos in the world.

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Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

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Search for blackheads on your arms for hours just because youre bored!

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Pee while setting down even if your a dude.

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I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

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I always feel like i have to eat something while watching a movie that I've seen so many times.

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If I'm alone, I'll imagine myself as somebody else an start acting as if I'm in a different life, complete with different people and places because in my imagination, I get to control what is going to happen next. Because, my imagination is way better than my reality.

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When sitting on the pot I whip and then I feel like I have to crap again.

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when you read a post that you don't do then start doing it

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getting excited when you find a recycled tissue in your robe/sweatshirt so you don't know have to get up to get one yourself?

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Having the tv on always, just for background noise. Doesn't work with a computer/laptop, must be the tv.

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after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

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fart then blame it on the guy next to me realizing theres no one near me and everyone looks at me....awkward

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When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

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Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie)

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when you are on EXCEL file on your computer, you scroll down so far, that it goes to 1000

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.