CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

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When I used to go on car rides at night I would look up at the moon and I would think it was following us.

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When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

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when you wave at a car thinking its someone you know and it ends up being some old lady.

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If I have to put the garbage out at night I sprint back into the house so the monsters don't get me

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When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

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I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

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Don't make a sound when sitting in the stall and someone walks in; and in turn, don't say anything to the person in the stall even if you know who it is!

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when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

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I sniff my finger after I scatch my bunghole lol

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I wonder why people were happy after the last election

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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pretend you have a fishing pole and are reeling in cars to pass them when your in the passengers seat going down the freeway.

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When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

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Have arguments with yourself about what to wear, where you put that other shoe, whether to get out of bed, etc. Just get up! No, you do it! You're the one who set the alarm! Ughhhhh I hate you!!

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When in the shower dread putting the shower gel on you chest as it is freezing!!!

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Feeling self conscious about breathing to loudly

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I always feel chinese accents are unintelligent.

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Think it's awesome when I look at a clock and it reads the same numbers that my address starts with.

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Look at every individual line on my hands and see if they are identicle

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when you hear "tartar sauce" you think that it's actually made from tartar -MATT

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as soon as i put some mint gum in my mouth, i sneeze countless times.

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listening to music and not realizing ur favorite song is on until the last word

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putting your hand in the water in the back of the toilet and thinking its gross toilet water and get grossed out

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.