When I'm walking in the street and I hear a car coming from behind I try to beat it by running to the closest telephonepole.

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Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

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Make odd grunting noises and sighs of relief while going #2.

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When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

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Fantasize a situation that turns you into a person with superpowers or something.

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I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

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I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

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When calling someone you hang up after 3 or 4 rings because you're tired of waiting rather than it being time to leave a message.

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When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

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Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

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Every time I see a pretty girl,the first thing I think is how I'd love to pin her down and tickle her.

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Play with my own boobs for no reason

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I got 12 months free xbox live gold from this website http://freexboxlivegoldcodes.org .You can also get it.

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Every time I walk up the stairs in my own house, I feel compelled to do it on all fours.

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look at bins as i walk past them

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I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

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I am always SO sure the metal detector or store alarms will go off when I walk through them. –Ikka

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Close the Facebook page, after not having a single message in hours, and re open it in a minute, expecting numerous new messages......

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Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

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I sniff my finger after I scatch my bunghole lol

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

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While listening to music, I take my headphones off to make sure nobody else can hear it.

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when i piss in the toilet, i flush half way through and race the toilet to the finish.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.