Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

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pee when you are dreaming haha lol

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Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

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think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

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After peeling an apple, I will put the apple in a zip-lock and hold it through the plastic so my hands won't get sticky while I eat it.

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Get extremly pissed off when everyone on youtube thinks that only guys use the website and call you "dude" , "bro" or "sir" when they respond to a comment you posted -_-

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Try to keep a balloon in the air with out touching the ground, using anything but my hands -Noel

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Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

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Think it's awesome when I look at a clock and it reads the same numbers that my address starts with.

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think up the funniest jokes right before i go to sleep and cant think of them the next day

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When your at your friends house and they run out of toilet paper, so you sit there like "what do i do now?"

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I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

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Mostly make fun of my best friends but never make fun of just regular friends

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Boinked my neighbor

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I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

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don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

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Leave coins on the floor in the corner when I have a party to see if there is a petty thief around

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I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

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I sit up all night on the computer/xbox then when people ask if i have slept i just lie and say yes to avoid the drama.

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Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

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When i was a kid. I really dont care about the story of any animated film. As long as im watching it.

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When someone is really, really angry is telling me their story, I keep a straight face but I can't help mentally laughing my ass off because of their weird facial expressions. Sorry.

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When in a room by myself and I hear someone coming to walk into the room I'm in, I feel an overwhelming urge to hide behind the door so they don't see me first.

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Getting secretly pissed off when people don't like your birthday post on their Facebook wall.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.