Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

Wondering how your funeral would play out if you die

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I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

Pretend you are turning Super Saiyan when sat on the toilet

Leave coins on the floor in the corner when I have a party to see if there is a petty thief around

I sniff my finger after I scatch my bunghole lol

Cover the built in webcam on my laptop when I'm using it with a folded piece of paper just in case

when im lying in bed and fart i bring the blanket up to my nose and smell it. And nod in approval..

When the toilet paper falls to the floor, I quickly roll it again so nobody notices it.

laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

think of who i would kill if i found out i only had a few weeks to live. i.e. sickest criminal alive.

When someone is really, really angry is telling me their story, I keep a straight face but I can't help mentally laughing my ass off because of their weird facial expressions. Sorry.

Think that my ice tastes different than my water.

Have troubles sleeping when it's hot.

Getting secretly pissed off when people don't like your birthday post on their Facebook wall.

Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

When I'm in the shower, you think of arguments that can occur, then think of good comebacks to say to your opponent. And when it actually does happen in real life, you don't have the courage to say it.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.