Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

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Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

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Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

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When in the shower hit the plug like a bath then just sit there for a few minutes as the water fills up.

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I only EVER take my watch off if I need tto put on big gloves, like cricket gloves.

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Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

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I lay in bed at night with my eyes closed but not asleep,and my mind will tell me that thier is someone standing by my bed,i will think and say to myself,im not looking because thats ridiculous. Then after a 30 seconds pause,have a quick peep.

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When in shower, I turn the heat to max for a few minutes to warm up the whole bathroom.

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If someone tells me what I did when I was drinking and it's stupid or embarrassing I pretend I don't remember because I was too drunk.

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try to only take one step on each sidewalk square.

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I have dreams that I am really rich and wake up to be thankful for my life just the way it is

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Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

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Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

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When peeing at a urinal, move my stream back and forth the coat as much of the wall as I can.

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When an ice cube fall on the floor I kick it under the fridge.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Pretend i'm a sim.

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When I see someone with similar hair to mine, I stare at them from behind and try to figure out if that's what I look like from the back.

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After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

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I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

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LOG OFF OF ICHAT BECAUSE THE PERSON U WERE JUST TALKING TO WENT OFFLINE.

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Drink alcohol out of styrofoam soda cups on the bus and train.

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Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

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Use a signature that automatically gets me hundreds of red thumbs... Yeah that moral crap...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.