You feel compelled to stab someone in the face... But you don't since you know its wrong. Instead you play violent video games to get it off your mind.

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RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

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Link gross things with porn i.e: Think of really gross things (or friends or family) when fapping to really hot stuff ( the porn becomes ruined)

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Remove all the stupid gobbldegook words that the captchas from this site add to my predictive text.

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try to rip the top off an Oreo without messing up the cream and then if the cream comes out on both parts not wanting to eat the Oreo because its wrong.

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think up the funniest jokes right before i go to sleep and cant think of them the next day

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Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

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I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

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Leftovers are better than the actual meal ;)

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getting excited when you find a recycled tissue in your robe/sweatshirt so you don't know have to get up to get one yourself?

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Use a signature that automatically gets me hundreds of red thumbs... Yeah that moral crap...

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I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

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I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

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When in the shower hit the plug like a bath then just sit there for a few minutes as the water fills up.

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that movie-like moment when you want to rush out to dance in the rain

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When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

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Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

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I sometimes look at a guy and wonder how big their dick is.

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Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

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Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

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I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

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Constantly hearing your name in public and asking "did you just hear my name?"

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imagine killing someone by accident and feeling really guilty about it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.