Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

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When in the shower hit the plug like a bath then just sit there for a few minutes as the water fills up.

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Sometimes I walk around town and watch peoples TVs through their windows. When they see me and confront me, I try to get a conversation about the show going.

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Scroll aimlessly through the posts on this website and for some reason, creepily stop and check the comments on the one that has the word "boobs" in it.

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Take off the ends of the banana (

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Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

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Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

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When your talking to a hot girl and then picture her naked with you in bed but then stop thinking about that because you think she can read your mind

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When in a room by myself and I hear someone coming to walk into the room I'm in, I feel an overwhelming urge to hide behind the door so they don't see me first.

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Watch a familiar movie, and then freak out when you see a suspensful part, only to later realize that there was no point in getting worked up since you already know what happens.

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Say to yourself "I really should get that work done" then do nothing about it

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Not likeing something someone posted because you have a secret crush on them and you don't want them to think you check there Facebook too much.

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Do somthing only you do

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Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

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Try to time the traffic light so that when I snap, my light turns green. Always so so close.

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I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

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when I go shopping I go in the store, get what I need and then I leave I don't browse.

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When reading a book where the main character has the same name as someone I know, I visualize that character in my head as that person.

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when i have a head or toothache...i hit it harder thinking it will stop or get better

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Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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While in bed, I cover my head with my bed sheets because it makes me feel safe from monsters.

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Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

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Try to keep a balloon in the air with out touching the ground, using anything but my hands -Noel

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.