Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

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When i go into a public toilet and one of the cubical doors is slightly shut, I will be really quiet or slightly push the door to see if anyone is in there.

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Press cancel on your toaster before it finishes so that you can eat faster

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when i watch a movie, and a character in it gos underwater, i hold my breath with that person until that person gets above water, then i let go, either that, after the character comes up from the water, i still hold my breath until i cant take it anymore.

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I speak dialogues at home to myself that I could possibly have with people in hypothetical situations. Km

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I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

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when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window

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I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

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I don't read the terms of service.

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think up the funniest jokes right before i go to sleep and cant think of them the next day

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When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

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Comment on here and wait a few days and see if I got some likes . CMOOON , You do it .

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imagine a bunch of girls are watching you at home, so you don't look like a dumbass

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when you hear "tartar sauce" you think that it's actually made from tartar -MATT

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when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

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Before getting in the shower, staring at your naked body, thinking your sexy.

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Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

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I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.

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filling your mouth with water in the shower and spitting it at the wall.

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When you look in the mirror, and it ruins your whole day.

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When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

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Scroll aimlessly through the posts on this website and for some reason, creepily stop and check the comments on the one that has the word "boobs" in it.

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Sometimes I worry that my life is just someones dream and that I'm not real.

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I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.