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Whenever I go to the toilet on an airplane I worry that during the time I'm there the plane will drop out the sky.
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-50
When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.
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-50
I'll imagine that I'm having a conversation with a celebrity, and either giving them advice or telling them why I hate them and calling them out on bullshit.
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-52
When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.
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-52
When I see a 20th Century Fox movie, I always sing the intro.
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-58
Mostly make fun of my best friends but never make fun of just regular friends
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-60
Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.
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-62
Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.
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-64
Think about my life as a book when I'm in public, for example "I then walked over to my friend to say hello to him."
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-66
I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.
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-68
Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O
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-70
I can't piss with my shoes on.
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-70
don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time
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-78
Pretend you are turning Super Saiyan when sat on the toilet
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-78
Nodding while talking on the phone then remembering the person can't see you
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-86
I only EVER take my watch off if I need tto put on big gloves, like cricket gloves.
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-98
laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.
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-106
putting your hand in the water in the back of the toilet and thinking its gross toilet water and get grossed out
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-118
I think of doing something productive, but can't work up the motivation and end up on the internet instead.
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+49
When your talking to a hot girl and then picture her naked with you in bed but then stop thinking about that because you think she can read your mind
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+23
Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.
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+17
Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv
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+17
When at Burger King, McDonalds etc. I always finish the drink before the food so that I still have the taste of the food in my mouth when I'm finished.
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+11
Getting secretly pissed off when people don't like your birthday post on their Facebook wall.
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+7
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.