I have won so many competitions online for things like being the 99, 999th visitor on the site

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Think of someone you love while trying to fall asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

thumb_up thumb_down -48

pretend your on the phone talking to someone to make you look like you not a loner

thumb_up thumb_down -52

as soon as i put some mint gum in my mouth, i sneeze countless times.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Wish you could delete a post if it gets thumbs down

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Think about my life as a book when I'm in public, for example "I then walked over to my friend to say hello to him."

thumb_up thumb_down -66

eating a sandwich with strategically placed bites such that i get the same ratio of crust to tastier non-crust sandwich center in each bite. sometimes i just take two smaller bites of crust and center part so that i don't have to taste mostly bread crust in a mouthful.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

When the wind is blowing like crazy, I pretend I am the god who controls it.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

I sit up all night on the computer/xbox then when people ask if i have slept i just lie and say yes to avoid the drama.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

Going to the very last pages of "Things you think you only do" with the lowest ratings and realizing that they really are the only ones who do that stuff...

thumb_up thumb_down +41

When eating chips I always look at each side before eating it to choose which side will taste better

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Delete the whole password when I mess up only the one letter.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Thinking epic thoughts like "Man, had a great workout today" just in case someone is reading my mind.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whenever I hear someone say a word in a way that I like, I repeat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I don't like to meet people when I'm well dressed because that's not me all of the time.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Press cancel on your toaster before it finishes so that you can eat faster

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Keep things on my body equal. ex. Hold something in my right hand so I hold something equally heavy in my left hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Feels my beard with my tongue.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.