touching something (like a crack in a wall) and then thinking to yourself that your the only person thats ever touched it..

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Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

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Not likeing something someone posted because you have a secret crush on them and you don't want them to think you check there Facebook too much.

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Mayada stupid

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Getting secretly pissed off when people don't like your birthday post on their Facebook wall.

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When receiving instructions from people one on one, whether it's a man or a woman, I wonder what they would do if I kissed them while they are talking.

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Lay in bed , and think what i could of said while i was talking to my crush or what could of happen.

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Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

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Tear up when I poop

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Think long and hard about something but then realise you don't care

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I stick used soap to a new soap so I don't waste it.

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Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

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moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

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Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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When I see someone with similar hair to mine, I stare at them from behind and try to figure out if that's what I look like from the back.

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I like making subliminal messages (givemeyourmoney)

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When texting someone on the toilet & they ask, "What are you doing?" I respond with, "Oh, just chillin." LOL. -Jade

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i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

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After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

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Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

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Videotape my mother in the shower.

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I speak dialogues at home to myself that I could possibly have with people in hypothetical situations. Km

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have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.