I have dreams that I am really rich and wake up to be thankful for my life just the way it is

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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I worry because I keep wondering why I worry.

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try to get abs by doing the stupidest things

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Try stick to something but fail in the end

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(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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I see something glittery, someone tells me not to pick it up because I'll glitter all over myself, I pick it up anyway and glitter all over myself.

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Imagining how it would feel to switch bodies with your crush

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Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

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Sometimes I think that if we play with dolls, maybe we're just dolls that someone is playing with and creating lives for.

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I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

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I don't like to meet people when I'm well dressed because that's not me all of the time.

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Wanting to change your name to Peter Jankins

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Listening to romantic hollywood sad core and feeling depressed because your single.

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I still put my thumb in my mouth, BUT only because I like the feel of putting my eye lashes under my fingernails and my thumb inconveniantly fits in my mouth. Now I know I'm the only person in the world who does this. I'm trying to drop the habit. But it feels so GOOD!

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Covering the movement sensors with toilet paper on public toilets incase it's a secret camera.

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Sometimes hold a piece of chocolate between your fingers until it melts then lick the yummy gooeyness off your fingers

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When ever i hear music that i like i imagine im in a fight and i know martial arts with people i dont know

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Walking around on the streets wondering if you are really walking in place, and the earth is spinning according to how you walk, like a treadmill.

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I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

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I use the internet to validate that weirdness is not actually weird at all.

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Not eat French fries because I don't like the taste rather than because they are unhealthy?

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Everytime my sibling starts a sentance with "I remember when","I have an idea"etc.,I get up and walk out.

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wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.