Sometimes when I'm sitting still I visualize myself being able to move myself using my mind.

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think up the funniest jokes right before i go to sleep and cant think of them the next day

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whenever someone pulls up beside you in another car, you are fully aware of them, but never look at them, your too cool to care what they look like.

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I have memorized my drivers license registration number

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Sometimes I pee sitting down and act like i'm a girl.

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Wish you could delete a post if it gets thumbs down

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I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

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Sorry I posted last comment 3 times. And it is best ever not beat ever.

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you know that when things have only one like on this site, the people who wrote it liked it

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Pretend you are turning Super Saiyan when sat on the toilet

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filling your mouth with water in the shower and spitting it at the wall.

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when im lying in bed and fart i bring the blanket up to my nose and smell it. And nod in approval..

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Sometimes I worry that my life is just someones dream and that I'm not real.

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Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

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I sometimes look at a guy and wonder how big their dick is.

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Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

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think of who i would kill if i found out i only had a few weeks to live. i.e. sickest criminal alive.

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When i am home alone i think there are hidden cameras in my house and wave at objects that might conceal the camers to scare the people looking through them

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

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Delete the whole password when I mess up only the one letter.

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When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

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When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

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Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.