try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

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Whenever I accidentally drop a glass or cup it always bounces the first time but breaks the second

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imagine a bunch of girls are watching you at home, so you don't look like a dumbass

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rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.

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All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

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check behind the shower curtain before taking a piss xD E E S

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When I listen to certain songs,it makes me feel awsome :D I listen to alot of LinkinPark -Briarwoodninja

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filling your mouth with water in the shower and spitting it at the wall.

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I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

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Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

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Take off the ends of the banana (

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The older I get the more honest I get

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Constantly hearing your name in public and asking "did you just hear my name?"

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When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

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When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

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like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

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When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

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When I can't find my phone so I panic and shearch everywhere only to find out it was in my pocket.

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try to get abs by doing the stupidest things

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Seeing an acquaintance who you would feel awkward talking to in a public place, knowing they see you as well, and pretending not to see them, while hoping they pretend not to see you as well.

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(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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When i go into a public toilet and one of the cubical doors is slightly shut, I will be really quiet or slightly push the door to see if anyone is in there.

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Sometimes while texting or messaging, I enact the physical gestures that accompany what I'm saying as if it were an in-person conversation, even though no one can see me.

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i leave tv on when i sleep...cant close it cause i hate to hear....noices...in my bedroom that cant identify......

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.