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Pointless Inventions
Tattoo Failure
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Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.
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-55
when you hear "tartar sauce" you think that it's actually made from tartar -MATT
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-59
Use a signature that automatically gets me hundreds of red thumbs... Yeah that moral crap...
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-61
sometimes when i see a cop cruising around i try and act suspicious to see if they pull me over.
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-63
Take pieces of loose hair and keep it in a plastic bag in my wallet so if I ever get killed and my ID stolen, my body can still be identified.
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-65
listening to music and not realizing ur favorite song is on until the last word
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-67
Hide your I pod when your parents walk in at 12pm and then go back to what ever you were doing when they leave.
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-67
When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.
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-73
Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <
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-73
I Never read the Terms of Service but click the box anyway .
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-75
When I was little I used to cover myself all the way up and put pillows around me, then ask my sister if she could see me, trying to be invisible when I sleep just in case someone breaks into my house at night.
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-79
that time where you open the fridge door and stare at it for like 10 min then close it and walk away?
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-79
Nodding while talking on the phone then remembering the person can't see you
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-85
Scroll aimlessly through the posts on this website and for some reason, creepily stop and check the comments on the one that has the word "boobs" in it.
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-93
Sometimes I worry that my life is just someones dream and that I'm not real.
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-93
Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.
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-93
taking a shit while brushing my teeth.
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-103
I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?
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-109
putting your hand in the water in the back of the toilet and thinking its gross toilet water and get grossed out
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-119
When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.
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+42
Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.
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+30
realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention
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+16
When eating chips I always look at each side before eating it to choose which side will taste better
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+16
Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment
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+12
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.