Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

try to give your friends spirit animals

Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

Stare at something long enough thinking it will eventually move.

Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

Cover the built in webcam on my laptop when I'm using it with a folded piece of paper just in case

I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention

sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection

Glance at your friend beside you, smile to yourself, and think, "I could murder them."

Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

Watch a familiar movie, and then freak out when you see a suspensful part, only to later realize that there was no point in getting worked up since you already know what happens.

Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

You look over the edge of a tall building/structure, and have that sudden urge to jump off.

brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

Sometimes I toot.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.