While in bed, I cover my head with my bed sheets because it makes me feel safe from monsters.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

After eating a sandwich, eat the leftover sesame seeds one-by-one.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Counting down on a digital clock, trying to say "0" just as the time changes.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

when passing someone in a car beside you, you try to wonder where they are going just by looking at them, their clothes or their expressions

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Remove all the stupid gobbldegook words that the captchas from this site add to my predictive text.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

try to rip the top off an Oreo without messing up the cream and then if the cream comes out on both parts not wanting to eat the Oreo because its wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

blink

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Pick your butt and then wipe your hand/fingers somewhere hoping that the smell dosn't stick to you and that no one smells it....

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Leftovers are better than the actual meal ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -55

start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Before I meet someone I've never met before, I think of stuff to say or do to prevent it from being awkward, but when I finally meet them I do none of the things I thought about doing.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Wondering how your funeral would play out if you die

thumb_up thumb_down -61

sometimes when i see a cop cruising around i try and act suspicious to see if they pull me over.

thumb_up thumb_down -61

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

thumb_up thumb_down -61

I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

thumb_up thumb_down -63

All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

thumb_up thumb_down -65

When bored you watch the minute hand on a clock and try to see if you can see it move

thumb_up thumb_down -65

I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

I can't piss with my shoes on.

thumb_up thumb_down -73

Go to bed at 9 am and then regret whole day is wasted

thumb_up thumb_down -75

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.