Use my phone to see what time it is

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When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

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You look over the edge of a tall building/structure, and have that sudden urge to jump off.

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When ever I'm walking up or down stairs, i always have to step on the last step with my left foot.

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Call out the mistakes I see drivers make in front of me.

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Drop something down the side of the couch, say that you'll get it in a minute and then forget about it

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Try to acomplish getting the rest of your meal reaady before the microwave timer goes off.

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When an ice cube fall on the floor I kick it under the fridge.

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I put toilet paper in first before i poop, so the water dosent splash me.

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Save more than once on your favourite game.

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Sometimes when I'm laughing really hard I awkwardly clap my hands.

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Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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if your behind glass or a window and you see a group outside, imagine their conversation.

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I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

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I used to eat bath bubbles

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when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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Listening to romantic hollywood sad core and feeling depressed because your single.

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think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

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When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

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Whenever I watch TV, the volume has to be on multiples of 5. Even if the perfect volume is in between.

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Stepping on people's feet when I approach to kiss/hug/say hi to them.

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While going to sleep, you turn the pillow downside-up several times to find a cooler surface.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.