Use my phone to see what time it is

When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

You look over the edge of a tall building/structure, and have that sudden urge to jump off.

When ever I'm walking up or down stairs, i always have to step on the last step with my left foot.

Call out the mistakes I see drivers make in front of me.

Drop something down the side of the couch, say that you'll get it in a minute and then forget about it

Try to acomplish getting the rest of your meal reaady before the microwave timer goes off.

When an ice cube fall on the floor I kick it under the fridge.

I put toilet paper in first before i poop, so the water dosent splash me.

Save more than once on your favourite game.

Sometimes when I'm laughing really hard I awkwardly clap my hands.

Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

if your behind glass or a window and you see a group outside, imagine their conversation.

I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

I used to eat bath bubbles

when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window

Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

Listening to romantic hollywood sad core and feeling depressed because your single.

think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

Whenever I watch TV, the volume has to be on multiples of 5. Even if the perfect volume is in between.

Stepping on people's feet when I approach to kiss/hug/say hi to them.

While going to sleep, you turn the pillow downside-up several times to find a cooler surface.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.