after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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make south park refferences every day

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read on youtube comments with too unlikes

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When you have the " If I'm on an elevator and it breaks and is about to crash at the bottom, and I jump up before it does, will I live?" thought.

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Go through a bunch of the boxes with the messed up letters (The ones making sure your not a robot) trying to find one you like. Then, click the refresh button and realize that the last one might have been the best one you were going to get.

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Pretend you are turning Super Saiyan when sat on the toilet

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Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

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Everytime aplane is flying low you think it's going to crash right in front of your eyes

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when walking i always count how many steps i have taken as i go

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I was not born in the country I am living in now

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I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

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When I listen to certain songs,it makes me feel awsome :D I listen to alot of LinkinPark -Briarwoodninja

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filling your mouth with water in the shower and spitting it at the wall.

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When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

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Go for a 10 mile run.

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.don't congratulate someone on facebook until someone other does, because maybe it's a fail.

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Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

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Analyzing what could be wrong or false about your religion and God, then shooing the thoughts away in fear you won't get into Heaven.

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While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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Glance at your friend beside you, smile to yourself, and think, "I could murder them."

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Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

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I wonder if sport games are rigged?

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When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.