I would try to make my pencil shavings as long as possible.

Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

I try to sympathize when some celebrity butthole has problems but, I can't.

Log onto facebook, notice a family member is also logged on, and immediately log off before they trap you in a never-ending facebook chat.

get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

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make sure you hit every crack in the sidewalk evenly. slowly over time, you discover that you found an awkward walking pace to match the obsession.

When I wake up after having a good dream I try to remember it but I don't

Sometimes I look at security cameras and start to act suspiciously like I'm up to something... but really... I'm not.

When ever i hear music that i like i imagine im in a fight and i know martial arts with people i dont know

Have a sudden urge to say "bomb" at an airport.

When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

I spin around in a spot, and then close my eyes and tilt my head up and to the opposite side i'm spinning to. It just feels awesome and it's even better while listening to music.

When a passneger in the car, I sing songs in my head and hope the song is in time with the signs and streetlights as I drive past them.

When in a public toilet, I never leave the cubicle until everyone is either out of the room or in their own cubicle.

While in bed, I cover my head with my bed sheets because it makes me feel safe from monsters.

After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

When I'm walking and I step on a crack with my left food, the next time I step on a crack it has to be my right foot and vise versa. I can't step on a crack twice in a row with the same foot. But I don't have to step on every crack.

Listening to music walking through town and feeling like you're in a music video

I cant ride a bike

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.