- Things You Think Only You Do

only read the short jokes on this website

Knowing and feeling that the whole world is out to get me............ And only me......... I know.......... Weird right??????

When a book is boring, i will think of my favouite song and then i will start singing the book, like i will look at the words and ligit, start singing them in my favourite tune~im so weird

when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

Looking at something suggestive on your computer and worrying that someone else in your family can see what you're doing on their computer.

Bored. Open refrigerator. Nothing to eat. Open it again five minutes later.

I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

Ur mum

expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

Leftovers are better than the actual meal ;)

Only use the left earphone.

Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.