When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

I lift my butt when I'm farting

thumb_up thumb_down -40

have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Stand on the first floor and look up through the 2nd story railing just to look up women's skirts.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

thumb_up thumb_down -46

When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

thumb_up thumb_down -48

getting really nervous about random white vans that drive by you.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

thumb_up thumb_down -56

I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Play my music so low in public that I can hardly hear it in my headphones for fear of others being able to hear what I'm listening to.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Picking my nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Being fat

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

YEET! TURN UP! KEEP IT ONEHUNNIT DADDY!! YAS GAGA YASS!! SIGN ME UP FOR THAT!! PU$$Y ON FLEEK!! PULLOUT GAME STRONG! LARRY IS REAL!! IMMA LET YOU FINISH!! IMMA REAL G! HOLYMOTHERFUCKINGSHIT!!!!!! I SAID HA! BITCH WHERE??? GIVE ME SOME ASS!! WHAT ARE THOOOSE!!! WHERE THEY AT THO?! BITCH BETTA HAVE MUH MONEY! FCK HER RIGHT IN THE PSSY! EAT THAT BOOTY LIKE GROCERIES!!!!! SURFBOARD! IM NOT GAY NO MORE! WHO'S YOUR DADDY? HOW YOU LIKE DEM APPLES?!! QUEEN! SLAY!

thumb_up thumb_down -64

All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

When you have the " If I'm on an elevator and it breaks and is about to crash at the bottom, and I jump up before it does, will I live?" thought.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

Think that when you're reading something or watching tv some people somewhere are knowing what your watching or whether or not you understand what you just read so you don't wanna reread it to risk looking stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

After getting up from the grass, I use my foot to move the grass I was sitting on around so that there isn't a butt print in the grass.

thumb_up thumb_down -72

when you're walking down the streets and you listen to your iPod, you pretend you're part of the music video for that song and when no ones looking, lip sync to the lyrics, as if the camera man's filming you >.

thumb_up thumb_down -72

Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

thumb_up thumb_down -76

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.