Whenever I think of something creative or weird, I always wonder if someone thought of the same thing.

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I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

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Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

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I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

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When you like your own comment or status', but then you feel kind of pathetic for doing it so you unlike it.

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Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

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Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

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Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment

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Anytime I walk in anyplace with cracks in the ground (tiled floors, cement squares, etc.) I do my best to avoid stepping on cracks in fear of something happening if I do.

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When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

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I wonder what a baby is laughing about when they are apparently being entertained by something in the room I can't see

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Getting secretly pissed off when people don't like your birthday post on their Facebook wall.

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Pretend to be texting to look popular in public

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try to get abs by doing the stupidest things

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When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

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Can't stop tears from comeing to your eyes when singing

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When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

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I used to eat bath bubbles

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i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

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make sure you hit every crack in the sidewalk evenly. slowly over time, you discover that you found an awkward walking pace to match the obsession.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.