I sometime's wonder if other people can see and feel everything I can but are just in my body too judge me.

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If someone tells me what I did when I was drinking and it's stupid or embarrassing I pretend I don't remember because I was too drunk.

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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Sometimes I toot.

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Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

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I mean Diana Ross.

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When i talk i say i like how or i hate that.

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Sometimes, for no real reason, I'll make strange or funny noises when no one is around.

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When I am making submissions to this site I sometimes accidentally put them in the comment section

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Playing hide-and-seek and finding the best spot ever, only to realize you have to pee

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Press cancel on your toaster before it finishes so that you can eat faster

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I watch American football with the sound down low because the announcers are always trying to tell us that we didn't see what we just saw when the referees make bad calls

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Whenever I get sweaty I put baby powder around my groin area and under arms. Ramos

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How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

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Learning a definition of a word and after that seeing it everywhere.

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I always have to remake my bed right before going to sleep in it

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shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

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when i watch a movie, and a character in it gos underwater, i hold my breath with that person until that person gets above water, then i let go, either that, after the character comes up from the water, i still hold my breath until i cant take it anymore.

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When I dont feel like sweeping I sweep the stuff under the fridge or something

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I used to eat bath bubbles

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Close all the windows on my computer when parents walk in.

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Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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When I see someone with similar hair to mine, I stare at them from behind and try to figure out if that's what I look like from the back.

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make sure you hit every crack in the sidewalk evenly. slowly over time, you discover that you found an awkward walking pace to match the obsession.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.