Whenever I think of something creative or weird, I always wonder if someone thought of the same thing.

I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

When you like your own comment or status', but then you feel kind of pathetic for doing it so you unlike it.

Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment

Anytime I walk in anyplace with cracks in the ground (tiled floors, cement squares, etc.) I do my best to avoid stepping on cracks in fear of something happening if I do.

When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

I wonder what a baby is laughing about when they are apparently being entertained by something in the room I can't see

Getting secretly pissed off when people don't like your birthday post on their Facebook wall.

Pretend to be texting to look popular in public

try to get abs by doing the stupidest things

When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

Can't stop tears from comeing to your eyes when singing

When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

I used to eat bath bubbles

i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

make sure you hit every crack in the sidewalk evenly. slowly over time, you discover that you found an awkward walking pace to match the obsession.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.